Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Epiphany

MedDude

Don Juan
Joined
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Take a look back at some of my older posts. Get a real good idea of what a blubbering, emotional fool I have been before you read any further on this one.

G'head. I'll wait.
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You back? Good. Let's get started.

I'm the recent dumpee of a nearly two year relationship. The details of the relationship are not important nor are the details of the breakup. That's not the focus of what I'm posting about. My focus is instead on what has happened to be over the last few days.

Post break up I have been an emotional mess. Analyzing every angle of the break up, reaching far far into the relationship at threads that I thought eventually lead to the unraveling if it all, made a timeline to determine where it went bad. You name it, I probably did it. Pathetic, I know.

So, even in my emotional state of mess, a sweet little number had been coming onto me. This eventually led me to a date last night that turned out swell. We had such great chemistry the entire night. This felt great as post break up I felt as though I may never find a woman that is not only interesting to talk to, but also sexy and engaging as well. But lo' and behold, such one was setting in front of me. So, with that, my fears of finding chemistry with another woman were vanquished.

Next, she is very flirty. While I never had too many insecurities about my looks it is always good for the ego to have an attractive woman reciprocate flirtiness in kind.

This is where the epiphany finally comes into play. We finally get to her place and things are escalating. I recognize all of the signs that she wants to get physical. Thing is, this girl has a boyfriend whom she says does not treat her well. This girl also considers my ex a very close friend. She says she does not want to get physical because of these reasons but her body language says different.

Any other time I would look at this and say, "let's do it!". But not this time. Something about my break up and this situation made me realize something. I hold loyalty and trust in high regard. Yet, here is a woman willing to betray her boyfriend and her friend to get with me. This disgusted me (I anticipate to be made fun of for this, lol). The fact that she is willing ot betray her friend and her boyfriend.

It made me realize that I put too much stock into women and not into myself. I have been worrying an pining over this breakup for the fact that I may never find someone I could just set down an d chill with like my ex. Wrong. The date showed me otherwise. I worried I may never have attractive women come onto me again. Wrong. This date showed me otherwise, as well. The date also left me a bit jaded towards women as it showed me that some are willing to betray people close to them and lie to them.

What I took from this the most is that it made me realize that I need to focus more on myself, my career, my interests, and my family. Make myself the best person I can be. Continue to date and have fun and not to get too tied up with women. Learn more about them as I interact and find traits that I admire in them. Then someday possibly find that one in a million someone I am willing to spend the rest of my life with. Stop worrying about women so much and stop putting them on a pedastal because they are so many out there that can give you the same things as the one before her or even more.

Live, laugh, love gentlemen. Take it easy.
 

samspade

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 5, 2008
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Good for you bro. First of all good job getting out there and having a little fun. Secondly good for you for choosing Respect with a capital R. guru1000 recently posted elsewhere one should always choose respect. Here was pu$$y being handed to you on a silver platter, but with certain caveats that made you uncomfortable. A lot of men wouldn't have turned it down.

I was in a similar situation recently and even though it was tempting to take advantage, I felt far better passing on it. Not that I cared so much about the boyfriend, but I don't need to be a scavenger.

As far as you being a blubbering, emotional fool - don't beat yourself up over that. It took me about a year to get over my ex-wife, and I left her. When you spend practically every day with someone for a long time, the separation hurts and can cause you to question everything. Sounds like you've found some answers.
 

MedDude

Don Juan
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Feb 7, 2012
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The strangest and most eye opening part was when her BF called and she went into the other room to talk to him like nothing had happened. Like she didn't have a dude in the other room, lol. A part of me regrets not doing anything, a bigger part of me felt I made the right decision considering how much trouble could come from it had I gone through with it.
 

Scaramouche

Master Don Juan
Joined
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Australia
Dear Med Dude,
You are pretty low on this Ladies priority list, if she even leaves the phone on during a romantic interval...that she choses,to talk to her Ex tells it all...Why be used MedDude?
 
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