Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Epic Beta White knight POF forum thread!

Naughty Ninja

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Just read this dudes thread on the POF forums. Jesus it's cringe worthy. Perhaps he'll score some "points" with the "ladies" who frequent that site. (And no it's not me the OP)

Of course the site lets it stay as it's a WK going against his fellow men. If it was a dude talking about chicks it would be pounced upon and shut down quicher than someone could reply.


Title: I hate to say it but I think men ruined the online dating experience for ourselves.

The OPs first post:

Just hearing stories and members talk about what online dating use to be like and past successes makes shows that it definitely isn't what it use to be. It seems as if the horny wave of unintelligent men have swarmed ALL these sites and just spam women with request for sex so now most women think all men are like this, which I think explains a lot of the lack of interest guys are experiencing on this site as they are just swept away and overshadowed by the flood. Does anyone else think dating sites need to take greater steps against this? Like more harsh sanctions and reporting system against men who just request sex and make new rules or separate sites? Even if I am just making excuses for my own failings it doesn't change the fact that a lot of women on here are apprehensive to men and less open because of these spammers, the actions of a few jerks have knocked down our chances even more.

The link to view the responses and "advice", The replies are just as cringe worthy as the OPs post and chick responses...lulzy :crackup:

http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts15766376.aspx

Told you that most dudes on there are pathetic/ clueless.

"The "guys" looking for sex "ruin" it." LMFAO. As if chicks who resort to online dating aren't doing the same thing or aren't screwed up etc.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Pimp-sicle

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Told you that most dudes on there are pathetic/ clueless.
LOLL! NN, I'm sure your spot on. But I wanted to point out that you didn't finish your sentence above, it should read:

"Told you that most dudes IN THE WORLD are pathetic/clueless when it comes to attracting and getting women."







PIMP
 

Asterisk

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I seems one guy isn't totally clueless.....

Title: Re: I hate to say it but I think men ruined the online dating experience for ourselves.
Posted: 1/1/2013 9:13:18 PM


OutMind said:
I personally have to thank all the creepy guys, all the good looking guys asking for sex right away, all the nice guys that want to email for ever, or send photos of their ding dong on the third email. I don't think it has ruined it for everyone. Every time a hot chic goes out with a hot guy and gets played, it opens the door for guys like me.

Yes, I want sex. Yes, I know all the tricks all the PUAs use. I don't use them, not because they do not work, they do. But because they only attract a particular type of woman and it only works to keep her for one night. I like sex too much to want to keep a woman for only one night. I want to enjoy that relationship for a long term.

Darwin said that the world does not belong to the strongest animal, not even the smartest or the fittest. The world belongs to those that can adapt the quickest. It's also a very Buddhist thought, the impermanence of things. So everything changes, and will continue to change, so we can complaint that the past was better, the present has been ruined, when in reality the past was not better, just with different dynamics.

The problem I see here with most guys is that you have been taught a polarity of life. Either you are an a ss whole, bad boy, or you are a nice guy, a needy idiot. Sorry. Life is tones of gray, and there are more than 50. There are things that I am blunt with a woman about. There are some things that I am a total gentleman about. And there's some of the b u ll sh it that I do not buy.

So to answer your question. The stupidity of what many men do, has actually made it better, not worse, for those that believe and want a long term relationship like me.
It looks like he's still trying to wife them up though....
 

spang

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i want to beat that guys as$ right now
 

Zarky

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I troll for sex online but don't see the problem with that guy's post. He's running "beta game" and that's fine. Beta game is a perfectly legit type of game and I'm not a hater. It doesn't work for me because it's not my personality and it requires a lot of effort, but it works for some.

It's not recommended by most online sources but it's still a legit way of getting laid. Certainly doesn't work as well as it did generations ago though...

Here's an excellent writeup about it:

http://rationalmale.wordpress.com/2011/09/02/beta-game/

And here Roissy talks about it, saying it needs an underlying base of alphaness. And I agree to a certain extent, but I've seen extreme betas pull extremely hot chicks.

http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2012/07/31/when-beta-male-strategies-can-work/

Generally extreme betas will pull ONE extremely hot chick and marry her. But hey, some guys dig that. I would rather drown in a vat of animal dung, but that's me.

In fact, now that I think back, I knew a guy who was a HUGE beta who pulled two threesomes with four different chicks in two weeks. It took him about 3 years of being their loyal beta friend (he had almost exclusively female friends), but he cashed it all in in one fell swoop and he can say he was in two MFF threesomes which I certainly can't.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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TillTheEndOfTime

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Please explain to me how the OP was anything but true???? lol Really? "Cringe-worthy"? Make a female account and you are spammed by 10 men within the first 15 minutes asking if they want to fvck and who can't spell basic words.

Everything in the OP is true except that it is not all men's fault. Men didn't create monster. They are only feeding it.
 

floydb25

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He's just going by what women say / claim, which is where the mistake lies. He'll learn how full of **** they are eventually... Or keep believing their lies like a dumbass. They all say what he's going off of, in their profiles, or on the forums. But he's still a dumbass regardless.

What you said at the bottom is true. The problem is, women deny / lie / blame, and the guy's assume it to be true. Same as the nice guy ****. They dont read between the lines, pay attention to what's really going on, how people are actually like, what they respond to, etc. They just believe, assume. sympathize, and act from what people are SAYING.

Mistake. Most people are delusional, biased, conceited, full of ****... They say whats most appropriate and least shallow, and blame everyone else to look pure and innocent. They're the LAST person you should listen to, as it relates to themselves. You'll hear nothing but good things (for them) and bad things (for everyone else). Never fails. They're a special cookie.

But this is common on dating sites. Its just another avenue (not unlike bars and parties) for shallow / crazy / stupid / dysfunctional girls to hook up with hot guys / bad boys / players - then playing the victim, claiming all guys are jerks, looking for a "real man" who doesnt play games, and basically complaining about the same things they are / feeling entitled to what they're not - then having the nice guy white knight idiots sympathizing with them - only to complain when they get used / played / dumped.

Its all the same. Just a bunch of morons and losers plaguing up the scene. Avoid.
 

bukowski_merit

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TillTheEndOfTime said:
Please explain to me how the OP was anything but true???? lol Really? "Cringe-worthy"? Make a female account and you are spammed by 10 men within the first 15 minutes asking if they want to fvck and who can't spell basic words.

Everything in the OP is true except that it is not all men's fault. Men didn't create monster. They are only feeding it.
Because he's talking about dating women on POF....... :crackup:

That's cringe-worthy in itself.

But to break it down sentence by sentence:

Just hearing stories and members talk about what online dating use to be like and past successes makes shows that it definitely isn't what it use to be.
I've been doing online dating since 1999. It has always been this way. The problem is not what the OP is focusing on, it's simply there's a lot more people doing it than there was a long time ago.

In 99, it was simple. Go in a local chat room on yahoo chat and A/S/L your way to same night meets.



It seems as if the horny wave of unintelligent men have swarmed ALL these sites and just spam women with request for sex
Again, this is nothing new. The only difference is - there's a lot more men online dating now (and women as well).

so now most women think all men are like this, which I think explains a lot of the lack of interest guys are experiencing on this site as they are just swept away and overshadowed by the flood.
The lack of interest has nothing to do with them getting "played" or "used" by men, or by perverts hitting on women. A pervert is only a man she isn't attracted to.


Does anyone else think dating sites need to take greater steps against this?
Does he realize there's pay sites that do this?


Like more harsh sanctions and reporting system against men who just request sex and make new rules or separate sites?
I don't understand what the OPs gripe is if he's not requesting sex from women. He should use that to his advantage and seperate himself.... I can almost guarentee this dude is sending boring emails to women and has boring pictures and talks about himself in his profile in a boring way............. That's his problem......



Even if I am just making excuses for my own failings it doesn't change the fact that a lot of women on here are apprehensive to men and less open because of these spammers,
So here's his matrix revealed. He's simply backwards rationalizing his own failures.

It's as simple as that.

Women are still just as open with the right guy. A guy who interests them; rather through appearance or through wit/humor/sexuality.

This guys failures is because he's the wrong guy. A typical guy. A boring guy.



the actions of a few jerks have knocked down our chances even more.
Men who openly request sex from women (in the first email) are often ignored! The same is said for the guys who say "hey" or "how's your day going?" etc.

The "jerks" are the guys who actually game who know how to get the women's interest....

The truth is though - the large majority of women on these free dating sites are the female version of these "jerks". They play men just the same, and do much better when it's a back and fourth thing (they use the guy for sex, he uses her for sex.)

Ignore all the nonsense in their profile about not wanting guys just for sex. They normally can't admit that out in the open or to themselves. They think the web they're caught in was put there by men. When it was put there by themsevles.
 

The Gambler

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^^^^ Everyone needs to reread the above post by bukowski_merit, just to make sure you didn't miss anything. If you EVER fall hook, line and sinker into believing what a woman says about herself on a dating site, be ready to be yanked out of the water and fried up for dinner.

I don't hate women because of the way they hedge themselves on these sites (and in real life, too -- no woman wants to be branded as a slut in the workplace or a social circle). As bukowski is saying, learn how to read between the lines. Begin a dialogue with a woman, listen to what she's saying, then TRANSLATE what she really said. Frankly, the first several minutes of your conversation with her should be taken lightly, as the shields are still fully up. As the conversation goes on however, that's when you'll start to get a feel for who this person is:

* Is she opening up to you?
* Is she enjoying the conversation?
* Any red flags? (i.e. "I always put my kids first", "If someone doesn't like me for who I am they can just move on", etc.)
* A huge red flag is excessive bitterness. We've all been screwed over, but if the tone of the whole conversation involves her being a victim, this ain't gonna work unless you want to be a white knight or AFC who will eventually be fried for dinner.

One more thing to consider is how long you should keep the conversation going (basic DJ Bible stuff). Don't let her talk about her problems for the next three hours straight. As a matter of fact, don't talk for three hours straight period. Not yet, anyway. These early conversations set the frame of who you are (Mr. Friend-Zone, emotional tampon, and nice guy means you have failed yet again). Your time has value and you have other things going on in your life... Right?

These simple points are true both in person and online.

The Gambler
 
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