"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Enthusiasm vs. Goofiness

DmanD

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whats crackin fellow DJs?

yep so couple days ago was another day of practice for my skills when we (along w/ some friends) were working, doing some boring things w/ many new people from places. I was feeling really well starting conversations w/ new people (hb too) and making alot of people laugh, making the work not as boring. Now while I mixed some C+F when talking to the girls and even other people one of my friends kept calling me loud and goofy (in a good "loving" way, i guess).

Now any of u guys can share the difference between suave + funny (Enthusiastic) vs. just goofy?

PS The whole time I enjoying myself ( not really trying hard or anything) and positive reactions kept me going (btw did u notice how w/ some people u r on top of your game and w/ some anything u'll say will not be as funny or smart, and it influences u too??)

So if anybody can clarify on the subject... please DO!!!

Thanks
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Michele l'Arcangelo

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it's simpler than you make it seem.

a good balance of everything is better than being JUST suave+funny... or just goofy.

be it all... but as you observed, not everyone you talk to is the same... thats when you can lean a little bit towards being slightly goofier, more suave, or funnier.

but just TRY don't be someone you're not! you'll look awkward. if you're a calm and collected person... who's trying to act goofy... you'll just look like you're trying to hard.
 

Snow Plowman

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Goofy is more like you giving your power away and being a dancing monkey. Basically I'm saying your doing all that stuff in order to get a response out of her which is a big no-no. The purpose should be you doing it for your own amusement and playing around with her.

Enthusiasim is more of an expression of how your feeling. So if your enthusiastic about what your saying then girls will feel that same emotional spike that you felt as you spoke about it.
 

EdHunter

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I think the above two posters have made some excellent points...leading me to I think the Cliffs Note for this thread:
Ask yourself, who are you doing <whatever> for? For yourself, or for someone else? It's usually easy to tell...
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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