"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Emotional Maturity and Mature games

flippinfreak

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Hey big guys

I know this is the wrong place for me, I read the sticky...

Hear me out though...

When you are young, people protect you so your mind doesn't get fycked up when you grow older right?

How do you gain this maturity, after you've grown?

Can a 30 year old man learn how to be mature, or has his childhood shaped him for the rest of his life?
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Duffty

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flippinfreak said:
Hey big guys

I know this is the wrong place for me, I read the sticky...

Hear me out though...

When you are young, people protect you so your mind doesn't get fycked up when you grow older right?

How do you gain this maturity, after you've grown?

Can a 30 year old man learn how to be mature, or has his childhood shaped him for the rest of his life?
I turn 27 this year, to be honest I LAG behind in terms of experience in about a lot of things. For example, study, job interview, flatting, buying first car, travelling,marriage/dating etc.

Would like some input about "how to develope into a more mature person" !
 

JC9

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I think the only time you will stop learning and maturing is when you stop pushing yourself.

So as long as you get out of your comfort zone from time to time, you will continue to grow, learn, and mature until the day you die.

The more time you spend out of your comfort zone, or at your edge (credit: David Deida's Way of the Superior Male) the faster you will learn and mature.
 

Vulpine

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Throughout one's life, one's sense of "self" (using "self" to encompass emotional, social, ego, etc.) and one's character is constantly evolving. Consequently, a person's interaction with the outside world also changes. People refer to this evolution as "maturing". Throughout what is commonly called the "developmental years", we test our boundaries and take note of outcomes in a sort of experiment with the world. This is why teenagers get a bad rep - the teen years is when the bulk of the "boundary testing" happens. Indeed, "boundaries"are always being tested and life constantly provides new and different scenarios to learn from, so one never really ceases to mature. If learning would stop, maturing would stop, and one would merely "age".

Now, should traumatic experience(s) happen during the formulative years, these experiences can either stunt or accelerate a person's evolution depending on the circumstances. Some people are sheltered and only get "life exposure" in small amounts until later on. Others get too much "life exposure" too early and don't have the emotional capacity to process or cope with such exposure. When I say "life exposure", I'm generally speaking of experiences and inputs that everone has that forces the evolution: deaths, divorce, money, drugs/alcohol, responsibility, Military, graduation, employment, love, loss, religion.... life scenarios.

"Maturity" isn't a switch you flip and you have it, it's not in a crown royal bag stuffed under someone's dashboard for you to find. When one is said to be "mature", it's is meant that, in accordance with their age, they act and interact with their world appropriately. You've heard terms like "mature for one's age". This means that someone has displayed characteristics that an older and more evolved person would typically display. Character traits such as respect, diplomacy, responsibility, tolerance, fallibility and restraint typically don't develop until later years, some never develop these traits. When a person consistantly displays some of these traits early on they are seen as "mature for their age".

There really isn't a gauge to determine maturity. The dictionary only defines it as being ripe. By definition, you are "a mature human" once you can get someone/become pregnant. But we typically refer to someone who is socially and mentally fully functional as mature.

Here's something to help you:

Immature people call other people immature.

Mature people (Adults!) have other things to worry about/consider besides another person's maturity, or, a mature person would have had enough diplomacy/restraint/tolerance to not "call someone immature". Instead, an adult would have the foresight enough to avoid the confrontation and wherewithal to remove the irritation from their life.

I must give the :up: to this site for the fact that there is so much "experience" of others and information on here that normally may take many years to be exposed to. This site is really a maturity gold mine... but how much you dig determines how much gold you find.
 

Desdinova

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How do you gain this maturity, after you've grown?

Can a 30 year old man learn how to be mature, or has his childhood shaped him for the rest of his life?
The way people in life measure maturity is how much or how little a person acts like a child. If you meet a 26 year old with his pants hanging off the tip of his ass, daily smoking dope, and saying "fvck authority", most people would consider him very immature.

However, if you meet a teenager who dresses in "nice" clothing, uses manners, and saves his money for a good purpose, people would consider him mature.

I think maturity comes from self-realization. When you realize you're doing dumb 5hit, you'll make an effort to stop (or outgrow it). However, an immature person will continue to do dumb things because they're "cool" and use that to impress other people.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Egoist

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we grow when we are faced with a challenge, adversity, problems, something we need to overcome.

seriously, this is the only way. that is why you need to constantly push the limits, walk right on the edge if you want to grow.

The more you stay comfortable, the more stagnant you get, the less growth you experience. It's as simple as that.

That's why people who have to deal with a lot of things or make their own way early on mature so much faster than others.
 

Vulpine

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Indeed, Egoist.

It's like learning to swim. Some are coddled and given floaties, others are thrown in and told "sink or swim". The one's that are thrown in either figure it out or are traumatized.
 

Macgyver

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Emotional maturity is basically how you deal with things. If someone is screaming at you, and you instantly scream back attacking their character instead of the dealing with the current issue at hand that is emotional immaturity. If the person rebuts dealing with the current issue in a logical critical manner while listening clearly to others, he/she is emotionally mature.

For Example:

George Bush is Emotionally Immature. He was basically coddled from the day he was born, born into priviledge and he knows no bounds. When someone asks him a serious question whether he knew the low validity of weapons of mass killing power in Iraq, he basically side swifted and used word play to entirely avoid answering the question. This is why some Republicans are dumb shats for following this dimwit.
 

flippinfreak

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You should have chosen a more down to earth example... we all know Geaorge Bush is a bad example(pun intended x 2)
 
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