"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

Egocentric Transformation

Sammo

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2003
Messages
1,244
Reaction score
11
Location
.
I'm sure you all feel it, that burning desire right at the bottom of your hearts that is telling you that you are destined for greater things. That feeling, tells you that your better then the people around you, you know that your potential is greater then any one elses. You, are a don juan.

Does everyone get this feeling? Or are you different? The answer to these questions are irrelevant. You have to feed off this feeling, you have to let it burn within you and grow in to a permanent motivation which continually pushes you on to bigger and better things, things that other people aren't capable of doing.

You know you are better then everyone else. When you neglect this feeling (ego) at the bottom of your hearts, you neglect your potential, you banish the person you are able to become. Never forget, you are a don juan.

While you bust your balls at the gym and stick to a strict diet, the rest are watching TV and eating at McDonalds.

While you are approaching girls and improving your game, making you irresistable to women, the rest are still worrying wether she looked at them once in maths.

While you are having sex with gorgeous women, the rest are masturbating.

While you are studying hard at school to expand your conversational ability and ensure future success, the rest play computer games and just feed their stress with even more McDonalds.

While you are studying finances and educating yourself to become financially stable, the rest are still on the couch watching TV.

While you always walk in to a room gracefully, greeting everyone and beaming with charisma, the rest try to sneak in to the room and hope their not seen.

While you are consistently the talk of the school, the rest are still wondering wether the girls know their name.

You are a Don Juan.

Welcome to Egocentric Motivation.

Egocentric motivation.. motivating yourself by comparison to everyone else. A (fake, but never the less effective) sense of ego. Know you are destined to do better things then the people around you, and act accordingly. Let that little whisper telling you your better grow in to a motivational monster which permantely pushes your benchmark of what you thought was self-improvement.

Now this brings forward an issue...

Egocentric motivation.. Is it the ultimate motivator? Or is it the pinacle of insecurity? It can be both. EEgocentric motivation can force you to be arrogant, and people begin to hate you, not like you. This is where you have to exercise some self control.

With great power comes great responsibility. As a don juan, remember to look after those around you and especially those close to you. Dont let the defenseless be abused, dont let old friends be left behind in the aftermath of your drastic transformation, be caring to your family, to your friends, to the needy, and to everyone who doesn't insult you. The people who insult you aren't worth your time.

When you begin to release your transformation, remember to be graceful. Don't be diluded by your recognised power. If you do this, you will become an ******* and this is how you will let insecurity consume you. Don't pick on that nerd because your friends do, stick up for the nerd, and then your friends will do the same once they realise your epic improvement.

Having said all that, let's begin your transformation. Whenever you feel your beggining to procrastinace or become fearful just remember your destiny, your greatness to be. Remember, you area don juan.

TIP: If any of this is information overload. WRITE DOWN what you have to do the night before in simple "To-Do Lists".
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

Sammo

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2003
Messages
1,244
Reaction score
11
Location
.
Your transformation - Part 1

The first part of your transformation is designed to make you "fit in". You have to fit in before you can stand out. This is perhaps for the nerd guys, we are going to improve you in the basics. Improve your main physical aspects, your main social aspects as well as your main academic aspects.

Optimistic Life-Style

This is the biggest improvement you can possibly make in your life. This is just those simple things you do every day that make your day so much more fulfilling. With this, it make alot of the other stuff come naturally. It consists of doing a couple of things.

Morning walks/runs - Every morning go for a short walk. This realses endorphins and has GREAT effects on the brain. Also if your fat, it has good effects on the metabolism. Make it a 10-15 minute walk, nothing to exciting. Don't always walk the same route, spice it up a bit and get a bit of change going in your life. If your fat then make 3-4 of these walks in to runs. This way you can get the benefits as well as losing weight. Remember to do it every morning. Once you do it for about 2 months you will find you start enjoying them and your day seems **** without them.

A healthy breakfast - This is really important guys. The old saying "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day" is 100% true. Make it a big breakfast, eggs, toast, fruit, cereal, milk, etc. Go nuts! :) Don't miss breakfast!

Always be friendly - This is also a big one (having a look at it - there all pretty big, haha). If your having a bad day, then why the **** should someone have to cop your bad mood. I don't care if its your parents or someone you have known your whole life, they didn't do anything wrong so they shouldn't have to put up with your ****. One exception is, if someone insults you, remember, don't get nasty at them, just dont take their **** and stand up for yourself. Everyone else should see the friendly side of you, and eventually you will become permanently friendly. An extremely admirable trait and is one of the first social developments you should undertake. This will also put you in a better mood.

Keep a diary - I know i made online ones but i quickly traded that up for a paper version. It worked alot better for me. I'm a lot more harsh on myself when i dont have other people reading it, it's a much better motivator. It also make your life appear a lot more simple which stops any confusion which could lead to depression. Try to write in it every night, NEVER skip 2 nights in a row. You don't have to write a whole essay, just write a quick summary of your day and whatevers on your mind, also add what you really wanted to improve on that day.

Always have something to read - This sounds stupid, but always have a book to read. Reading books is extremely relaxing and helps clear the mind. I always have a book on financial independance, only because i don't enjoy other books but its your choice. I'm not going to tell you what to read. However, magazines don't count. Read this at least 30 minutes every day, and I highly reccomend you do it in the 30 minutes before you go to bed (This is also a good time for you to write in your diary). If your going out that night, then do it in the morning, just dont skip it.

Get some sleep - You need AT LEAST 8 hours sleep a night, so go to bed an hour before that, read for 30 mins and write in your diary and that should help you get to sleep. Also, don't oversleep, this can force you to become lathargic and that has a terrible effect on your progress. Use an alarm and wake up in 8 hours even if you have nothing to do that day. Sleeping in can wreck your whole day.

Stop masturbating - If you can, stop masturbating all together. However if you absolutely must do it, then do it a maximum of once every 4 days. This is to try and keep testosterone levels as high as possible. If you stop all together then your gains at the gym will be better, you will lose fat faster, and more importantly you will have a higher sex drive.

Change your physique

Lift weights - Go to the H&F forum and get yourself a program. If your just starting weights, DO NOT get straight in to it, you will injure yourself. Start with 12 reps and work your way down to 8 reps. Also, take advantage of being new to weight lifting and do full body splits. Meaning train every body part 3-4 times a week, you can do this for a while until you start over training, and then you have to go down to training each body part 2 times a week and eventually end up training each body part 1 time a week. Here's an example of a full body split:

Do this 3-4 times a week:
Bench press 3x12
Pec Dips 3xFailure
DB Press 3x12
Lat pulldowns 3x12
Hyper extensions(optional) 3x12
Barbell curls 3x12
Tricep pushdowns 3x12
Leg press 3x12
Leg Extensions 3x12
Abs.

Remember, have perfect form. The first few weeks are about perfecting your form. When you start overtraining then move on to a split like this.

Do each twice a week
Split 1:
Bench press 3x10
Incline Bench press 3x10
Pec dips - 3xfailure
Shoulder press - 3x10
Lateral raises 3x10
Tricep pushdown 3x10
Close grip bench press 3x10
Split 2:
Lat pulldowns 3x10
Rev. Lat pulldowns. 3x10
Deadlifts - 3x10
Leg press - 3x10
Leg extension - 3x10
Leg Curls - 3x10
Barbell curls - 3x10
Pracher bar curls 3x10

When this makes you overtrain, then look at DEISELS guides in the H&F forum for more information.

NOTE: If you have any queries about weight lifting, DO NOT bring them up in this thread. Please PM me or make a post in the H&F forum. Sorry, but i dont want this thread to turn in to a weight lifting debate.

Eat right - This is more important then lifting weights. You dont have to come up with a strict diet straight away. Just start eating right. The first change you can make is no soda and a **** load more water. This is the best change you can make in your diet. Also, just start eating fruits instead of snacks, wholemeal bread, etc. You know the healthy food, just start eating it. More strict dietry changes are to be made in the 2nd part of your transformation.

Dress right

This is a fairly obvious one. Don't worry about buying those $130 jeans. Just stick with the normal kinda clothes, remember at the moment you are just trying to fit in. No extrememly bright colours, just the basic things. A couple of nice T's/jumpers (depending wether its summer/winter), one or 2 pairs of fitting jeans/shorts(again, depending wether it summer/winter), a pair of new shoes, and maybe a couple of hats if they suit you.

Learning to socialise

This is just about learning to talk. Here are some of the major tips i can give you to help you "Fit In" as far as conversations go. Remember this isnt the be-all end-all. This is just getting you used to talking in groups, etc.
  • Remember to TALK, don't sit there and say nothing. Be the main contributor in group convo's.
  • Always ask about the other person, and go from there. Open them up. Talk with them, laugh with them, etc.
  • Make the first move, talk to people before they talk to you, be the dominator.
  • Look people in the eyes when you talk, not at the ground.
  • LISTEN! People ussually talk about what they want to talk about, so stay on that subject.
  • Give a good handshake to your friends

That should do for this part. We will get more specific in the next part. Stick to the above for both guys and girls. A good way to learn these is to stick with one point at a time until they all come naturally.

Academic studies

This is really important. I'm not going to college but im still excelling. Why? Because i want to learn. People think school is there to help you get to college, no, school is there to help you learn. I have found there are 3 things you can do to help you do well at school.

Daily revision - Every time you get home from school, look over all your work and make sure its all ingrained in you head. Don't rush through it, make sure you understand it. This is the most important factor when it comes to doing well at school.

Test revision - With test, try and simplify it. Write down everything down on a piece of paper and read over it, again and again.

Assignment completion - The biggest tip i can give you when it comes to assignment is, ask the teacher for help. It's amazing how much of the assignment the teacher will actually do for you. :) Also, don't leave it till the last day, do it in the afternoons. Try and leave you weekends free.

Your looks

So you have improved your physique, but you have to get rid of some other problems if you have them.

Acne and pimles - Buy some daily face wash and use it twice every day. Also, buy some more serious treatment if you have it bad. If that still doesnt work then it is a great idea to go to the doctor and see if he can help you.

Your hair - Get a good thing going with your hair if you havent done so allready. Don't be afraid to ask the hair dresser what they think you should do. Try something new, colouring it, etc.

Your hygeine - Allthough this isn't your looks i didnt know where else to put it. Get deoderant that works, shower every day. Just an important reminder. Noone likes a guy who smells. Simple :)

That's all you have to do in terms of looks at the moment.

Play a sport

Get involved in a sport, any sport. The competition is really good for ya. Also, dont say your in to weight lifting, because that doesn't count. However, i can accept bodybuilding if you have studied everything and are really getting in to it (have a strict diet plan, using supplements, etc.).
 
Last edited:

Sammo

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2003
Messages
1,244
Reaction score
11
Location
.
So once you have all this completed part 1 you will be:

  • Always in a good mood and friendly towards people.
  • Be dressed nicely.
  • Be on top of all your homework.
  • Be able to communicate effectively with people leaving a moderate to good impression on them.
  • Be in good physique
  • Have fairly good looks
  • Are involved in sport

That's fitting in, is it not? Once you have done all of the above stuff then feel free to move on to part 2.

Your transformation - Part 2

So part 1 was all about fitting in right. Well part 2 is, you guessed it. All about standing out. :) It's pretty much just more of an improvement of what we have all ready done. This is when you really start showing your stuff.

Remember to keep on with all the stuff in part 1, that is the bread and butter. Keep improving with that. I can gaurantee you that if you keep excelling with all the basics in part 1 then you will acheive more then just fitting in. Think of part 1 as your foundation from which you grow from.

Your style

So now is the time to start REALLY standing out in terms of your style.

Clothes - Lets talk about clothes. Have a look at some magazines to get your own definite style going. When it comes down to it, if you don;t want to dress a particular way then dont do it. However if you are like me, and you simply don't care what clothes you wear, your not affected either way, then you might as well wear what will make you appear more stylish. :)

Here is how i weant about it. I started by deciding that from now on I will have 2 wardrobes (not literally, of course). Clothes for going out, and casual clothes. All the clothes in part 1 were pretty much for casual needs, but i will include what you should have in terms of casual clothes anyway.

Casual clothes - Try to have at least 5 casual T shirts, they don;t have to be to fancy, this is just to wear around at school, etc. They should be cool but not over the top. If you've got the body, then go the tight shirts! Make sure you get a couple of the base colours. white & black, and i find a tan shirt is always good. Now, depending on wether it is summer or winter, it's time to buy some shorts and jeans/pants. I find just the basic shorts do the job, when it comes to shorts there are plenty of styles, the choice is yours really. Pants are the same, try not to always wear sports pants, try some fitting jeans. Grab a couple of fitting jumpers and jackets as well, not any big baggy stuff, just some jumpers that fit will do just fine.

Going out clothes - Now the first thing you should focus on in terms of going out clothes are a couple of under shirts, these can either be singlets or actual under-shirts. 2 are enough, one black and one white. I find it good to sometimes grab a fashionable T shirt, these are ussually casual clothes but if you find a good one then you can wear it out, just something different. Now for the fashionable shirts, it's up to you guys, Just pick a couple of different colours, you don't want to look the same every time you go out. Also grab 2 pairs of fashionable jeans, one a lighter colour and one a darker colour.

Cologne - Buy a cologne! This is really important, only wear it when you go out however, if you wear it in the middle of the day you just look like you are trying way to hard. One of the best style tips i read around here somewhere is only put a bit of cologne on, don't have a 2 metre radius of cologne. The reason for this is because girls will associate that nice smell with being close to you, there for they will want to be closer to you more often.

conclusion (get a job) - Thats all for style. I know you may need a fair bit of money for all that so i guess this is a good time to remind you all of the importance of having a job. Without a job you miss out on a lot of the simplest improvement oppurtunities. Gym membership, clothes, etc. They all cost money, and if you don't have it your going to have a difficult time. Personally i have been through a lot of jobs so if any one wants a hand trying to find a casual job then PM me and ill give you a few tips.

Bootcamp

The bootcamp attributes this part extremely well. Complete the bootcamp and you really will start standing out. This is probably the hardest part of your transformation but one of the best steps for it. Good luck!

Remember to keep a record of your progress in your journal. It will prove to be an extremely motivating idea.

Learn to Socialise more effectively

The next stage in your social advancement. Same as last time, focus on each point one at a time and keep trying at it until you get it naturally.

  • Use good bodylanguage - always look people in the eyes, stand/sit up straight, talk confidently, smile, keep your legs a bit apart, etc. There are heaps of posts about body language, you should focus on the basics here guys. Part 3 we can look at the more complicated body language things, such as pacing.
  • Try cracking a joke, start becoming a little more humorous, some good ways of doing this is telling the group about a funny story a couple of you were involved in, playfully teasing one of your GOOD FRIENDS, making a funny observation on something nearby, etc. Use your imagination. Practise make perfect!
  • Include everyone in the conversation - Make sure everyone is included in the conversation some how. As the leader, you should be making sure everyone is kept happy.
  • Enthusiasm, being enthusiastic without looking stupid is a hard skill to master. Just really get in to what your saying and people will to.

More changes to your looks

The purpose of this section is to make yourself even better looking. If you do all the stuff in part 1 as well as complete this, then you will look great. No matter how bad you are, you would have to be AT LEAST a 7 out of 10. Which is all you need to get any girl. An average guy after completing all this would be an 8 or a 9.

Your skin - Either just get tanning oil and tan out side or if it is 100% necessary start going to the solarium. Either way, get a tan. :) A tan is possibly the number one thing you can do to improve your looks. Don't get spray on tans, they tend to look blotchy and orange rather then tan, they look stupid. If your skin is dry then get a moisturiser.

Body hair - There are plenty of methods of doing this. I would also rather refrain from turning this thread in to another "ass hair removal" thread so i wont get specific. Just get rid of the unwanted hair.

Your teeth - Finally, get some tooth whitening gel. Get to work on your teeth and make them nice and white. :)

So lets look at exactly where you are now!! :)

  • Always in a good mood and friendly towards people.
  • Always be dressed for the occasion, look great in your clothes!
  • Be excelling academically.
  • Be able to stand out in conversations, girls start to notice you and guys start to follow you because your a good comunicator.
  • Be in great physique
  • Have clear skin, a good tan, no disgusting body hair, and your teeth look great!
  • Are involved in sport
  • Are good with women thanks to the bootcamp!

Now that sounds like a cool guy to me. :)

On to part 3~!
 
Last edited:

Sammo

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2003
Messages
1,244
Reaction score
11
Location
.
Your transformation - Part 3

This part is still under construction. Sorry guys, i just feel im not qualified enough to finish this part yet.

Part 3 will be about advancing past just standing out. It will be about being the "coolest" guy in the school, a recognised person around your school. I'm about half way done. I will finish it though. Give me a few weeks to a month.

You will be pleased to know it is allready half complete.
 

Sammo

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2003
Messages
1,244
Reaction score
11
Location
.
Conclusion

In closing, i hope you all enjoyed reading this as much as i enjoyed writing it.

Thanks to all the guys that motivated me here at the forum, consider this my present to the forum.

Good luck, and take care.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

jiza101

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 29, 2004
Messages
614
Reaction score
1
Age
39
Location
Making the most of MY life
great post as always man.. this along with Pooks post has set me on my way, i have goals and i will achieve them, and i thank you for opening my eyes and being able to see them :cool:
 

LikRetsam

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 30, 2003
Messages
1,633
Reaction score
1
Needless to say how great this is ;).

I resent the part in your first post on video games. I play video games all the time and easily keep up with my 'I'm better than you' attitude.

As you said about not going over board with your new found power. I completly agree. The less you use it, the more powerful it becomes.
 

Juggalo

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 24, 2004
Messages
107
Reaction score
0
Awesome post Sammo!

Those posts really helped me out! I learned alot from them and they'll help me out alot with my goals.
 

InsidiousNstinct

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 5, 2003
Messages
763
Reaction score
4
Age
40
Location
Somewhere between the cities of Lost and Found
Awesome post sammo. I myself have decided to get into a gym also. Going to get a membership later on today. :D
 

jonny football hero

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 1, 2003
Messages
705
Reaction score
1
Age
38
Location
!Robin Hood country, Uk!
Too true......'bout time we got back to basics or "old school"
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

Sammo

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2003
Messages
1,244
Reaction score
11
Location
.
Thanks for the replies guys. :) It's really appreciated.

I'll get on to part 3 ASAP.
 

RaMar

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 22, 2002
Messages
214
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Location
California
Excellent stuff. This is a great summary of the material on sosuave. I can't wait till part 3.
 

comic_relief

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 29, 2004
Messages
3,282
Reaction score
49
Location
Baltimore, MD
I read half of it...

and then decided that I should wait until you finish it. I like what you wrote so far so keep it up.:)
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

Read more...

Sammo

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 18, 2003
Messages
1,244
Reaction score
11
Location
.
Update

UPDATE: Part 1 & 2 have been elaborated on in alot of sections. A couple of things added. Also, it's been formatted so it is easier to read now.

Part 3 is coming guys.
 

JSH

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 20, 2003
Messages
1,088
Reaction score
0
Age
39
Location
London
Really good, im slightly sad that i had to wait three days to read it as i was away when it was posted. Sammo, u like your guides dont you?
 

Pfeile

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 21, 2004
Messages
77
Reaction score
0
Originally posted by jiza101
Sammo is the master of self-improvement.
I second that. Your various posts over the past year or so that I have been visiting this site have helped me more than any other user, so I thank you Sammo. :)
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Top