Wyldfire,
Do you want to know why people attack you so much? From what I observe, it is for two reasons.
1. You spill out your life story with excessive details.
This has two effects:
First - Do you think people who come to a men’s self-improvement/dating forum want to hear about how a single mother raised a son? Or how your husband was in jail? You make some good posts, but often it is littered with your whole life story. Most of the time it has little relevance to the thread. Even if it did, you do not need to post in such detail. Look, you even provided me with an example in this thread!
I've never trolled here. The only place I ever trolled was Yahoo Message Boards...and only because my best friend was a rather prolific Yahoo troll. He tore up the Dating and Romance message boards there...and is legend. He was a phenomenal writer who would post extremely politically incorrect and borderline offensive things to set a trap for hyper emotional people to react and then he'd slowly lure them into a debate and then rip them to shreds. He was the most intelligent person I have ever known. The only time I ever really enjoyed trolling was with him and it was never something I did on my own. He has since passed away, so rest assured...there is no risk of me trolling here or anywhere else. I do love to debate, though...and if provoked enough I can be very mean...but I don't troll anymore. If I did I wouldn't have admitted being a troll in the past.
Really, did you have to post all of that? In such detail?
To tell you the truth, I feel you offer great advice most of the time. It’s when you go on and on about your son or your husband that gets annoying.
Second – Posting personal information makes it easy for people to attack you. There is a reason why people like Pook don’t post their personal information. Imagined if he did. It would lower the quality of his posts and make it easy for people to attack him. You might want to be completely honest and open, but understand the position you put yourself in when you post personal information. Especially when you post information that can make you emotional.
Now for the second reason.
2. Your comments can be incredibly arrogant.
Look at what you wrote in this thread.
The thread locking is a separate issue. You left a very insulting post on the thread that should have been deleted. That's why I bit back. You have to understand that I am in a very unique position on this forum. I am one of only a very few women and have the strongest personality out of all the women who post here. I am intelligent, write well, am not afraid to challenge something I don't agree with. I have been here a very long time and there is always a few guys who feel compelled to make these kinds of personal attacks against me. If I sit back and ignore them it doesn't make the attacks and insults go away or happen less often. The opposite is true with me because of my unique circumstances. If the moderators allow it and I don't stand up firmly and show that I won't put up with it then a bunch of guys who are too afraid to join in when I am snarky will jump in and derail every single thread I post on.
Pay attention to the bold part.
What was the point of saying that? Did you even stop to think how the other women would respond to that statement? Do you think by saying that people will all of a sudden start listening to you? Do you really achieve much by saying that? To tell you the truth, all I see you achieving is getting more people mad at you (the women in particular). What is the point of self-proclaiming your intelligence or personality?
Now take a look at what you said here.
What typically happens is that I will start a thread and it will be going along fine...until someone decides to come in and just throw out an uninvited personal attack on me, usually entirely unrelated to the topic being discussed.
A lot of your attacks are invited. Maybe you don’t see the connection. If a woman who post on this forum decides to attack you later, you may think it’s a random out of the blue thing, but it’s really because of what you said previously in this post. You see, even though you have not made the conscious decision to troll, your arrogance in a way creates the effect of trolling. Then remember you also spill out your life story which makes your attacks even more invited. To add to that, because of your unpopular status, you tend to hijack almost every thread you post in because people attack you so much. This only makes it worse as you already know.
Last but not least, it really isn’t a great idea to rely on the moderators to fix everything. They are not on this site 24/7. They are people too and can have a particular bias. Instead, learn how to protect yourself instead of relying on the moderators.
