Dumbest/Weirdest thing you've said while in the throes of passion/sex

[AmIAFC]

This happened years ago, but to this day, I can't help but chuckle when I think about it.

I was making out with a HB6.5, and let me tell you, she was pushing all the right buttons. We were in the missionary position, and I was just hammering her (doing the slow stroke/hard stroke combo). I was seconds from climaxing -- sweat pouring, face contorted, snarling -- and as I unloaded, I screamed out to the ceiling, "On.." -- thrust -- "...top..." -- thrust -- "..OF.." -- thrust -- "THE WORLD..." -- thrust -- "MAaaAaaAaaawwwww!!!" I collapsed on top of her, but when I quickly lifted my head to see her reaction, she was glancing left and right like, "What the f was that?"

What about you guys?

 

[Create Reality]

I told her I "was tired".

 

[silverwex]

and as I unloaded, I screamed out to the ceiling, "On.." -- thrust -- "...top..." -- thrust -- "..OF.." -- thrust -- "THE WORLD..." -- thrust -- "MAaaAaaAaaawwwww!!!" I collapsed on top of her, but when I quickly lifted my head to see her reaction, she was glancing left and right like, "What the f was that?"

lol!

 

[Disconnect]

ROFL! That's some funny ****. Can't say it happened to me, though. I'm trying to imagine what "MAaaAaaAaaawwwww!!!" would sound like .

 

[Disconnect]

This happened a year ago. Me and this girl were going in for the kiss, and as we were an inch away, I whispered: "Kiss me!"

We laughed so hard we fell out of the tree.

 

[The Bad Ass Canadian]

This happened less than a week ago.

I was doing this chick I just met, and while we were going at it she said that she hadn't had sex in ages. I said "me too. It's been almost a month!" lol


Needless to say i had to do some damage control, hahaha. I guess her idea of "ages" is a lot longer than mine :crackup:

 

[Dimebag_Darrell]

I was at this girl's house and as we proceeded to do it. I couldn't get it up and I was like, "I'm tired!" and she was like "I Understand." and then with my drunk ass I proceeded to jump into the pool where her friend was swimming and I started banging her friend in front of her right after I told her I was "too tired". I got kicked out of her house afterwards and hadn't seen her since.

 

[piranha45]

Originally posted by Dimebag_Darrell
I was at this girl's house and as we proceeded to do it. I couldn't get it up and I was like, "I'm tired!" and she was like "I Understand." and then with my drunk ass I proceeded to jump into the pool where her friend was swimming and I started banging her friend in front of her right after I told her I was "too tired". I got kicked out of her house afterwards and hadn't seen her since.

her friend just spontaneously turned around and let you **** her? or were you already doing her friend for some time before that day?

 

[HBK]

Just after cummin in a girl once , and she looked at me waiting for me 2 say something sexy or romantic, typical irish man i winked and said "now so!"
turned on my side and fell asleep

 

[Dimebag_Darrell]

Originally posted by piranha45
her friend just spontaneously turned around and let you **** her? or were you already doing her friend for some time before that day?

Ok look. It was the I got out of jail and my friends tell me to chill with them. Well when I'm there, these girls come over and hang out. I was a horny bastard and I got them really interested in me. Afterwards I suggest going over to their house to chill since they mentioned a swimming pool. We agree head over there and I proceed to use push pull technique. We began drinking and I just kept acting like a bad mofo. A few minutes later she told my friend that he was boring and he got pissed off and left me and my friend with these two chicks. We're drunk and in her spa and damn I should have seen it coming because out of nowhere this hoe just jumps on my **** and begins raping me. It definately was uncomfortable at first but then I was cool with it and we start porking and somehow I'm like "yo I'm tired" truth was, I wasn't in sexual mode and as much as I wanna bang my d*ck needs a good reason to wake up. She was like, its ok I understand". Now I'm really drunk and not giving a f*ck and I spot the other girl in the swimming pool after she apparently rejected my friend.

I didn't even tell the girl I was with anything at all and by impulse I jump into the pool and begin rubbing this girl's tits and kissing her neck and sh*t.

She begs for me to slam her and I did and I banged her and called her a slut and all the works and she was cool with it. And then I came on her tits and got back up out of the pool and headed towards the other girl and she got pissed and told me to leave.

She still has my tanktop, that b*tch

 

[piranha45]

hahahahaha, nice score

 

[Bonhomme]

One gal I was dating told me of a guy who, out of some strange neurological quirk, always shouted "LONG LIVE THE REPUBLIC" when he came. So, one time when we were having sex ...

 

[spider_007]

Originally posted by Bonhomme
"LONG LIVE THE REPUBLIC"

now that's desturbing

 

[wheelin&dealin]

During some heavy groping I put my hand firmly around the girl's neck like I was gonna choke her and said "I wanna hurt you"...

You should've seen her reaction... lol

 

[WORKEROUTER]

Originally posted by wheelin&dealin
During some heavy groping I put my hand firmly around the girl's neck like I was gonna choke her and said "I wanna hurt you"...

You should've seen her reaction... lol

Ya, sometimes a triangle choke just happens.

 

[Soprano]

"are those the panties your mother laid out for you?"

 

[Teen Spirit]

"damn, your pu$$y's not as tight as your mom's"

 

[seanchai]

F-ck that first story is funny. If I was drinking milk I'd snort it out me nose.

With my stamina, I don't have time to talk.

 

[JH6]

so there was this hoodrat type girl on my street.

Jeez, this is going back like a year ago over one of my unemployed summers.

We had made out a few times, and i ff'd her while driving 70mph down the thruway, but never had sex.

So we're making out and whatever, i know we're going to do it.

All of a sudden I tasted the cigarette that she had just smoked, and was totally grossed out.

I couldn't get hard at all, but wanted to have sex just for the sake of having sex.

So, i'm like umm i'll be right back.

I went to the bathroom with a maxim to get, umm, excited, and surprisingly that worked well enough that i could do this chic and think of the maxim model.

Haha, goodtimes.

 

[donjuan87]

Oh, M'Lady, I'm storming your castle on my steed!

(a little Anchorman reference for ya)