"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Dude!!! L-O-V-E

What's your viewpoint?

  • When there is love, there is life

    Votes: 11 26.2%
  • Love deeply affects me, but there are many things of greater importance

    Votes: 7 16.7%
  • I am not quite sure whether I buy the whole ordeal

    Votes: 3 7.1%
  • I don't think I've experienced that love yet

    Votes: 15 35.7%
  • I've traversed life, and love is a mere illusion that tempts us to make babies

    Votes: 6 14.3%

  • Total voters
    42

California Love

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Lately, it seems, both in SoSuave and real life, that dating and relationships have become exceedingly mechanical. I constantly see infatuation, sexual passion, and serious talk, but rarely tenderness and love. A few weeks ago, I was driving by a local italian restaurant, Florentine, and I saw a young couple standing out in the rain in deep embrace. Although it was quite a distance away, I could clearly see soft serene smiles and closed, empassioned eyes on both faces. The woman clutched the man's arms and he gently caressed her hair with his hand. It was pouring like a mother, the skies a dark gray, but you could tell that the two have never been happier. This one-second experience left me rejuvenated and warm for the remainder of the night.


For those of you who still believe in love, tell us about your experiences with that special someone who touched your life.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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CLOONEY

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Lol, I think you are talking about infatuation!
 

Sart

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CLOONEY

Im with Clooney. BUT! What a great move by that bloke carressing the chick. I mean, she would have swooned. You know, he still made her sleep in the wet spot that night right?
 

WaterTiger

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Nahhh! That's L-O-V-E. That wonderful, deep, warm feeling of security.

Infatuation is that wild, zesty tingle you get when you see your significant other.
 

California Love

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Clooney and Sart, I understand what you guys are getting at, but I believe that there is a very subtle but important difference between infatuation and love. There's a tenderness and understanding in love that infatuation never touches upon, similar to that between siblings, where both sides share the feeling at the same intensity and are focused upon nurturing the other. Often, the love is not manifested (sibling rivalry, arguments), but in the long run, it is obvious how much the two care for each other through a multitude of small actions that do not inquire for a response.

Keep up the replies! :)
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Wyldfire

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My deceased fiance' and I were just like the couple described in the first post. Complete strangers would just look at us together and smile. I think seeing a couple that happy just makes people feel good about the world for at least a little while.
 

CLOONEY

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Infatuation causes people to do things like that! They do things out of the ordinary, and I would call that out of the ordinary. They are still very soft and tender towards eachother and feel like they know they other profoundly. Everything the other does, is just perfect to them, and they see past all their flaws.

Then, once the honeymoon period ends, usually within 6months to 2 years, those same things they once "loved" become VERY annoying!

Love is something that is built over years, it is very hard and has to be tough sometimes. It is a mutual respect for eachother, and is based very much on compramise.

This is where I see a BIG difference in it to you!

Once you have been through the infatuation stages with some girls and realised how hard work, EVERY relationship is, you will understand what I mean. Love is something that is VERY rare. However, seeing two people infatuated can be much more entertaining, because they are experiencing emotions beyond their control. Emotions caused simply by a mix of brain chemicals.
 

Wyldfire

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What he saw was a happy couple, period. Whether they were still fresh in their relationship or had been together awhile makes no difference in the grand scheme of things. All that matters is at that moment they were very happy and totally lost in each other. Yes, two people who are infatuated with each other can look like that, but two people who are genuinely in love look like that, too.
 

00Kevin

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I know that I could fall in love with two women at the same time.

love does exists dude!
 

CLOONEY

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Originally posted by Wyldfire
What he saw was a happy couple, period. Whether they were still fresh in their relationship or had been together awhile makes no difference in the grand scheme of things. All that matters is at that moment they were very happy and totally lost in each other. Yes, two people who are infatuated with each other can look like that, but two people who are genuinely in love look like that, too.
They sure can.

The chances? A LOT slimmer! How many happily married 40 year olds do you see like that? How many young 20 year olds do you see like that?

One far outweights the other.

This is why I still say, he probably saw a young couple infatuated with eachother!

How long were u with your fiance for Wyldfire? Thats sad sad news, sorry!
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Love is the natural order of things but it is hard to fanrhom that it is genuine in such artificial times as today!!! Or if we do imagine it as real and sincere then we can only view it as temporal and not permanent - such is the sad state of relationships in the 21st century - welcome to the real world!!

What's up Clooney - you were on hiatus from this forum for some time.
 

Climax

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{{{{ -^ (L)-(O)-(V)-(E) ^- }}}}

Love is a beautifull thing that many people do not get to experiance in their lives... but those that do, have lived a life worth living. If you can find a woman that you will love completelly, and that she will love you back completelly, then you are trully gifted and should be thankfull to have been able to find that. Love is a delicate thing, treat it with care, and it shall be yours... forever. TRUE love never dies, so find yourself the 1 woman that will TRULLY loove you, and that you will tryully love back, and THEN you shall experiance the TRUE beauty of love, and happiness.


Laterz...
 

Wyldfire

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Originally posted by CLOONEY
They sure can.

The chances? A LOT slimmer! How many happily married 40 year olds do you see like that? How many young 20 year olds do you see like that?

One far outweights the other.

This is why I still say, he probably saw a young couple infatuated with eachother!

How long were u with your fiance for Wyldfire? Thats sad sad news, sorry!
I met my fiance' right after leaving a 10 year marriage where I was horribly unhappy. I was with my fiance' for 5 years and we looked at each other the same way the entire time.

No, it doesn't happen a lot, but it would happen more if people knew how to have good relationships. If you know what you're doing it's actually very easy to do.
 

AMF

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"And in the morning, they wore each other's faces."

If you truly have never felt this way, I cannot express the depth of my pity for you.
 

CLOONEY

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Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover


What's up Clooney - you were on hiatus from this forum for some time.
Hey PRL. I sure was, and still am. I still drop into the Anything Else forum really just to talk about sport, and then off to the health and fitness for a quick look. Then outta here. I guess I just cant be bothered anymore explaining the same things over and over, the basic fundamentals of the site still seem to be here, guess its just live and learn for the newbs now! At least they still have you hear to keep them entertained and to keep their little immaginations in the real world!
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

CLOONEY

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Originally posted by Wyldfire
I met my fiance' right after leaving a 10 year marriage where I was horribly unhappy. I was with my fiance' for 5 years and we looked at each other the same way the entire time.

No, it doesn't happen a lot, but it would happen more if people knew how to have good relationships. If you know what you're doing it's actually very easy to do.
Awesome!

Although I dont agree, I think it also takes a LONG LONG time to find that person who is compatible to you! I have dated absolute copious amounts of woman, and out of all, only found 2 I have really "clicked" with. Both were absolute trouble makers and thrived on the downtimes bringing the relationship back to the high, and then the cycle repeating itself multiple times! I have only found 1 who was there to make it work and very very smart when it came to relationships and getting the most out of them, she was very much in love with me, although, too bad I coudlnt say the same for her. It is just a numbers game that can take a long long time and a lot of hard work IMHO.

But, I am glad you found that happiness once, and hope you have already again, or do in the future, find it again!!
 

Wyldfire

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Originally posted by CLOONEY
Awesome!

Although I dont agree, I think it also takes a LONG LONG time to find that person who is compatible to you! I have dated absolute copious amounts of woman, and out of all, only found 2 I have really "clicked" with. Both were absolute trouble makers and thrived on the downtimes bringing the relationship back to the high, and then the cycle repeating itself multiple times! I have only found 1 who was there to make it work and very very smart when it came to relationships and getting the most out of them, she was very much in love with me, although, too bad I coudlnt say the same for her. It is just a numbers game that can take a long long time and a lot of hard work IMHO.

But, I am glad you found that happiness once, and hope you have already again, or do in the future, find it again!!
Well, I have found someone else that I connect with on that level, at least mentally and emotionally, perhaps even on a deeper level than I connected with my fiance'. We've never met in person yet, though. He's still got some wild oats to sow, issues to resolve and growing up to do. Not sure it will ever go anywhere, but one thing is for sure...even if it never goes beyond friendship, he's priceless to me. I'm confident he would say the same about me, too

After my marriage every relationship I've had has been quite good and easy for both myself and the other person. Unfortunately, finding someone smart enough to keep me on my toes and secure enough not to try to stifle my independence is usually what leads me to bolt. I'm virtually impossible to catch and even harder to hold...but very easy to get along with, loyal and devoted. It makes for some very interesting situations, that's for sure.

:D
 

MVPlaya

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L, its for the way you look at me
O, its for the only one... I see
V, its very, very... extraordinary
E, its even more than anyone that you adore
and love, its all that I can give... to you
Love, its more than just a game, for two
Two, in love can make it
Take my heart and please don't break it
Love, was made for me and you

- "L.O.V.E" by Nat King Cole
 
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