Drunkedly kirked on my girl, whats the best way to diffuse the situation

[-=Ice-T=-]

So I got drunk tonight and hung out with my girlfriend at this party. As usual, she's pretty wasted too. I try and bum a cigarette from this other chick and my girlfriend absolutely hates me smoking cigs (she doesn't have a problem with pot though). My girlfriend snatches the cig and snaps it in half. Normally I wouldn't care as she is drunk, but I'm wasted too and I start cursing her out and calling her names in front of all her friends, which probably embarassed the crap out of her. I was saying some pretty mean and f*cked up things. In the end she gets upset and cries and tries to make me feel bad and argue with me. So I end up leaving her there and going to another party and drinking/blazing more without her.

She kept calling me throughout the night and crying to me over the phone but I Was just like "Look I'm busy right now, I'll stop by tomorrow and we'll talk."

In the past, I would not apologize and find a way to put the blame on her while covering my ass because I really didn't give a damn, and in the end things would work out and I come out on top. I'm just wondering is there a better way to diffuse the situation aside from my selfish and jerk way, without coming off as a wussy?

She made a point by saying "What if I talked hard sh*t about you in front of all your guy friends, what would you do? You probably wouldn't stand there and take it like me." That kind of made me feel bad. I guess David D's teaching have made me kind of selfish in a way. How should I approach the situation with her?

 

[snowbert]

I think david d said something like 'just not get involved in such a situation'

but now that ur in... ur in deep sh*t lol

 

[-=Ice-T=-]

bump

 

[flexion_]

The easiest way is prevention of this crap. You essentially blame the alchohol on your situation and its actually you that is the problem. Learn to control yourself when you are drinking. Be a happy drunk instead of the other. That is the solution.

 

[Demon]

I'm just wondering is there a better way to diffuse the situation aside from my selfish and jerk way, without coming off as a wussy?

You were a complete prick. I highly recommend you take responsibility for your behavior, blame yourself, and grovel at her knees for forgiveness. If I were at that party, I would have knocked you out. She may have broken your cigarette, but there's no doubt that what she did was in the interest of your health. She boldly demonstrated that, and you verbally abused her and then ditched her.

That's no way for a DJ to act. That's no way for a man to act. Wise up, and make certain she knows that you are deeply sorry. Make sure that she knows that you understand if she doesn't want to be with you anymore. She didn't deserve what you did. More importantly, you don't deserve her. Let her know that's how you feel.

In the future, don't drink to get drunk. You clearly can't handle yourself at that point. Get a buzz, have fun, and make sure everyone, especially your girlfriend, has a good time.

 

[-=Ice-T=-]

Update: Apologized and talked it out with my girl. I had no right to do what I did and it was a selfish act. I'm glad she's an understanding girl.

 

[Demon]

Surprising update. I really didn't expect you to apologize given your claimed aversion to "coming off as a wussy". Some guys apparently think saying sorry is a bad thing. It's not. Good job.

 

[Faded Image]

That's what happens when you first start listening to David D and reading sosuave. You become a sponge that soaks up everything (i.e. nice guys always lose and a whole lot of other stuff) with that in mind, you actually become a jerk.

Don't worry about it, it's a cycle that a lot of guys here has gone through including me. Eventually your thoughts will change and you can enjoy a happy medium.

You f*cked up so apologizing was all you can do.

Just make sure it doesn't happen again.

 

[NatiL]

Oh My God Don"t ****ing Listen To These Afcs

Change Her State Not Her Mind

You Let Your Gf Snatch A Cig From Your Hand And Throw It On The Ground??!?!??!?!?!?!?!

 

[-=Ice-T=-]

Oh My God Don"t ****ing Listen To These Afcs

Change Her State Not Her Mind

You Let Your Gf Snatch A Cig From Your Hand And Throw It On The Ground??!?!??!?!?!?!?!

You're right, but at the same time what I did was unacceptable.

 

[Colinski282]

So I got drunk tonight and hung out with my girlfriend at this party. As usual, she's pretty wasted too. I try and bum a cigarette from this other chick and my girlfriend absolutely hates me smoking cigs (she doesn't have a problem with pot though). My girlfriend snatches the cig and snaps it in half. Normally I wouldn't care as she is drunk, but I'm wasted too and I start cursing her out and calling her names in front of all her friends, which probably embarassed the crap out of her. I was saying some pretty mean and f*cked up things. In the end she gets upset and cries and tries to make me feel bad and argue with me. So I end up leaving her there and going to another party and drinking/blazing more without her.

She kept calling me throughout the night and crying to me over the phone but I Was just like "Look I'm busy right now, I'll stop by tomorrow and we'll talk."

In the past, I would not apologize and find a way to put the blame on her while covering my ass because I really didn't give a damn, and in the end things would work out and I come out on top. I'm just wondering is there a better way to diffuse the situation aside from my selfish and jerk way, without coming off as a wussy?

She made a point by saying "What if I talked hard sh*t about you in front of all your guy friends, what would you do? You probably wouldn't stand there and take it like me." That kind of made me feel bad. I guess David D's teaching have made me kind of selfish in a way. How should I approach the situation with her?

Fvck that buddy, you my friend are NOT in some deep sh!t. You handled your business...maybe not in the BEST way, but you definietly handled it. What you need to do is NOT apologize, not right away. You first need to assess why you acted like you did.
You tripped out because she embarassed you in front of everyone...the sole person who is never suppost to embarass you does it at a party, thats unacceptable....tell her it wasnt the cigarette, that it was the whole context....that she can just put her hands in your face and be so controlling.
You then come to a cross road. You either let her do it and she GIGGLES inside and tries it again sometime and in the process look like a b!tch, or you handle up, treat her like accordingly and show her that it is unnaceptable.
What u did was right, Next time dont yell and find better words than ones that wil label her!

 

[mrRuckus]

Update: Apologized and talked it out with my girl. I had no right to do what I did and it was a selfish act. I'm glad she's an understanding girl.

What you say is an understand girl i say is a stupid girl. She should dump your ass. You sound like if you get mad enough you could hit her. She needs to date someone no so childish and isn't so easily rattled

 

[Demon]

You tripped out because she embarassed you in front of everyone...

In other words, he went crazy because he was insecure. Embarassment results from insecurity. A DJ is never insecure.

 

[-=Ice-T=-]

In other words, he went crazy because he was insecure. Embarassment results from insecurity. A DJ is never insecure.

Insecurity had absolutely nothing to do with it, inebriation did.

Stop assuming things, you don't know me and never will.

 

[Demon]

If you wouldn't have overreacted in your usual manner, I would have told you that I was responding to Colinski282's interpretation of your motivation to be a prick, and not assuming anything about you. Since you did overreact and assumed that I was actually talking about you, you've helped me reach the following conclusion...

Insecurity had absolutely nothing to do with it, inebriation did. Stop assuming things, you don't know me and never will.

After what you did, I'm surprised anyone would want to know you.

You were embarassed! Being drunk only served to lessen the degree of control you had over your emotions. You showed your true colors--you're a prick. I know what it's like to be buzzed, drunk, wasted, smashed, and completely incapacitated by alcohol. Don't give me that "blame the alcohol" bull**** that you inevitably told your girlfriend to shift the blame away from you because you are mentally unable to be responsible for your behavior. Don't blame me because you can't own up to your mistakes. But I know you will anyway.

In the past, I would not apologize and find a way to put the blame on her while covering my ass because I really didn't give a damn, and in the end things would work out and I come out on top. I'm just wondering is there a better way to diffuse the situation aside from my selfish and jerk way, without coming off as a wussy?

That says everything anyone ever needs to know about you to avoid you.

Welcome to my Ignore List. :rock:

 

[-=Ice-T=-]

If you wouldn't have overreacted in your usual manner, I would have told you that I was responding to Colinski282's interpretation of your motivation to be a prick, and not assuming anything about you. Since you did overreact and assumed that I was actually talking about you, you've helped me reach the following conclusion...


After what you did, I'm surprised anyone would want to know you.

You were embarassed! Being drunk only served to lessen the degree of control you had over your emotions. You showed your true colors--you're a prick. I know what it's like to be buzzed, drunk, wasted, smashed, and completely incapacitated by alcohol. Don't give me that "blame the alcohol" bull**** that you inevitably told your girlfriend to shift the blame away from you because you are mentally unable to be responsible for your behavior. Don't blame me because you can't own up to your mistakes. But I know you will anyway.


That says everything anyone ever needs to know about you to avoid you.

Welcome to my Ignore List. :rock:

Sorry if I offended you, I didn't mean to. Maybe it was my insecurity, maybe it wasn't. I'm just happy I diffused the situation correctly afterwards or I would have lost a good girl.