Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Dreams, show yourself!

Nocturnal

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There are a great many things I enjoy. So many things I wouldn't mind spending my time doing. In fact, right now my life is heading in the direction of doing things I don't mind doing. But that's not good enough for me.

For quite some time I've developed a yearning to follow my dreams. To live my passions. I've lectured and convinced myself time and time again just why I should give up all of the mediocrity that absorbs my life, and focus instead on the things I love, the thoughts of which make my heart race and steal all of my mind's attention away.

But the passions which I urge on to engross me, the dreams that I beg to at least consider me, I am blind to them.

No matter how many times I tell myself that, with patience, my heart will lead me to the place which I unconsciously seek, I can't get rid of the feeling that I might just find myself waiting forever. I can't eliminate the possibility that society has convinced me to put my dreams aside, and scrub all traces of them from my memory. What if I've been leading a life for these 18 years, which has meant a metamorphisis that I can not revert? Has my soul been taken--no, has it been given away, never to be found again? That can't be it, for if I did not have a bit of it left to spare, the simple thought of having dreams would have been shunned by its conqueror.

Some men start as boys with unfaultering aspirations: "I want to be a fireman when I grow up!" "I want to build bridges when I grow up!" "I want to be a doctor!" I recall no such visions. Were my dreams ever there? Were they snuffed out before they even had a chance to germinate? Before I could even recognize them? Could it be, that my entire life I've been trying so hard to let the right things happen by themselves, that I've trained myself not to make them happen myself?

I could not deny any of those accusations, whether I were to accept them all or not. But upon realizing that living ones dreams is the only way to truly live, I thought that following this epiphany would be the discovery of what I loved. Time goes on, and I have yet to find what I love.

Do I wait forever? What if it never comes? I've allowed myself to experience many things, and like I said, many of them I enjoy. But none of them could I completely devote myself to.

A man cannot be completely devoid of dreams... can he? I don't want to believe that, but I will not deny the truth, if that's what it is. I can only hope that my dreams surface eventually... and when they do, I will grasp them with an unbreakable iron grip. I will seize them and never allow them to leave me.

I just hope they come soon, because there is nothing worse than expecting something that turns its back on you and never comes.

So for those of you who believe you might have an answer, I implore you: where do dreams hide themselves?
 

drixsa

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dreams hide themselves in denial.

you are 18, stop with the philosophy.

Though needless to say i think we'd get along great.
 

CrotchSniffer

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You ARE your dreams. There is no distinction except for the ones we create in our minds.

The problem arises with our parents. Some encourage dreams and others don't. I feel sorry for those of you who didn't have support like my folks gave me. It made all the difference in the world.

My advice is simple.

Next time you see your mom, put her in the full nelson and DEMAND that she give you your dreams back. If she does not comply, you have my permission to punch her in the titties!
 

Gus

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Do you think it impresses everybody when you use big words and convoluted, but meaningless sentences? No, I bet that hardly anybody finishes your post because finding your meaning requires such intense untangling that people spend all their time trying to decipher it...and THEN it registers with them what you are talking about. You're harder to read than Kant.
you are 18, stop with the philosophy.
Nocturnal, over the years I've noticed that many times you seem to be detached from reality...living in a fantasy land of daydreams and what-ifs.
Some men start as boys with unfaultering aspirations: "I want to be a fireman when I grow up!" "I want to build bridges when I grow up!" "I want to be a doctor!" I recall no such visions.
I thought you didn't compare yourself with society.
Could it be, that my entire life I've been trying so hard to let the right things happen by themselves
The right things don't happen by themselves. Perhaps instead of training to make them happen by themselves, you should have been training to actually make them happen.
Has my soul been taken
By whom?
has it been given away
To whom?
No matter how many times I tell myself that, with patience, my heart will lead me to the place which I unconsciously seek
You're letting your emotions dictate who you are. Maybe it's time to let your mind take over.
I've lectured and convinced myself time and time again just why I should give up all of the mediocrity that absorbs my life, and focus instead on the things I love, the thoughts of which make my heart race and steal all of my mind's attention away.
So are you focused on doing what you love, or doing what you think is not "mediocre"?
I can only hope that my dreams surface eventually
Dreams are not some seperate entity that float around and choose people to attach to. Dreams are created by people; they are products of thought and reason. They are NOT the little light bulb above your head, or a little poof of cloud above you while you sleep. They're simply ideas.
Do I wait forever?
Stop waiting, it won't show up at your doorstep.
What if it never comes?
It won't come. It doesn't even exist until you design it.
which has meant a metamorphisis that I can not revert
Change will happen, whether you want it to or not. Reason will follow and logic will flow, whether you're happy or sad or confused. Regardless of your emotions, reason will follow. Based on your post, your entire life is determined by your emotions...you are clashing with reality, with consciousness, with yourself, and with life. Smack yourself out of it!
 

aBAzLLnA

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drixsa: He's questioning his path, his way of life. It's not quite philosophizing, but the way he chooses to live.

Nocturnal: What is the purpose of your search for a dream in the first place? Is it because society expects you to have some sort of direction in life? To truly live, one lives his own desires, does what he wants to do. You live for yourself, not for others, but it is your choice, your freewill to choose how you live. But I'm telling you, go ahead and search for your own dream, your own passion, but you won't be successful because dreams and passions aren't found, they just exist. You don't all of a sudden realize "oh ****, I'm passionate about art". It's a feeling, and something you just know.
 

drixsa

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Originally posted by aBAzLLnA
drixsa: He's questioning his path, his way of life.
yes i think that was quite obvious but as i mentioned before, he is 18 so your going to have to forgive me if i think that his sermon was a bit frivolous.

It's not quite philosophizing, but the way he chooses to live.

or the way he is talking but not doing.


and yes this is philosophizing but as i mentioned before which you probably didn't understand when i said :
Though needless to say i think we'd get along great.
 

Nocturnal

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drixsa:

I thought dreams hid in denial. I still do. But after consciously opening myself up to them, they remain hidden. Unless you are implying that I'm still in denial, in which case a more elaborate explanation is what would be most helpful.

Why is it that whenever I ask about why things aren't where I want them in my life, people point out my age and consider the matter settled? Yes I am young. But I didn't say I was patient. The most successful people in life are the ones who didn't sit around waiting for things to happen, or for the right moment to come. Why should I?

About getting along great: glad to hear it.

CrotchSniffer:

You ARE your dreams. There is no distinction except for the ones we create in our minds.

Could you explain this a bit more? It seems to be as close to being on the right track as anything else.

derEikopf:
Do you think it impresses everybody when you use big words and convoluted, but meaningless sentences?

No I don't. The most important thing I mean to get out of most posts that I write is usually just to solidify my thoughts. When I use metaphors and "big words" it is usually to attempt to pinpoint exactly what I'm thinking so that I understand my own thoughts better. Granted, I know that a lot of people don't want to or cannot take the time to decipher them, but that's ok. This post would still have been helpful to me with no replies at all.

Nocturnal, over the years I've noticed that many times you seem to be detached from reality...living in a fantasy land of daydreams and what-ifs.

I may very well have been "living in a fantasy land of daydreams and what-ifs," but for good reason. Are what-ifs really so bad if they open your eyes to how things should be? I've always been in the habit of contemplation, not constantly but once in a while, some times more so than others, and contemplating and exploring was what shook me out of my nice-guy/AFC daydream, as well as others. To the man stuck in a fantasy, isn't reality but another fantasy? I do know what you mean though, and although you say it in such a condescending way, I think I agree with your contempt for daydreams and fantasies.

I thought you didn't compare yourself with society.

On no, of course I compare myself to society. Habits are hard to break, and that is one that is still being broken. But when I speak of children dreaming of their future, and saying that I never had those dreams, I mean to compare myself to how I would have liked to be, whether it is society or not.

Perhaps instead of training to make them happen by themselves, you should have been training to actually make them happen.

You're right. But my question is how do I make non-existant dreams happen. Although I will say that I find myself seeing part of an answer as I write this.

You're letting your emotions dictate who you are. Maybe it's time to let your mind take over.

Aha. But emotions should dictate who you are. I quote myself from this post:

If your goal is truly to become a great artist, then you only have to identify that goal and allow logic to tell you what to do to take you there.

The goal is driven completely by emotion though, and THAT is the emotion you need to listen to.
But when I am without goal-directing emotion, I am without my dreams. In that sense, I am asking the emotion for orders, but I recieve none because I don't feel its existence.

So are you focused on doing what you love, or doing what you think is not "mediocre"?

Neither. I would like to think they are both the same, because if I loved it then it would not be mediocre to me. But as I said before, I don't feel it there so I can't really say.

Dreams are not some seperate entity that float around and choose people to attach to. Dreams are created by people; they are products of thought and reason. They are NOT the little light bulb above your head, or a little poof of cloud above you while you sleep. They're simply ideas.

This is the perspective I needed to hear. It actually makes sense. But I still see the ultimate driving force as emotion... could it be that that emotion is developed by the process of thought and reason?


Change will happen, whether you want it to or not. Reason will follow and logic will flow, whether you're happy or sad or confused. Regardless of your emotions, reason will follow. Based on your post, your entire life is determined by your emotions...you are clashing with reality, with consciousness, with yourself, and with life. Smack yourself out of it!

Thank you.

I will have to get back to the rest of the thread later. My lunch break is over.

I appreciate everyone's input.
 

Visceral

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EVERYONE has dreams, Nocturnal, and that includes you.

What very few people have, however, is the desire or the discipline to follow through on them.

We live in a universe of infinite possiblities, but we possess only finite ambition. I think this is what you're running into; it's not the dream that you lack, but the desire to live it.

There are a million things that I could do right now: I could bust my ass on my school project, I could go out tonight and try to approach some women, I could bust my ass in the gym ... you name it, I could do it.

But am I going to do any of them? No.

Why? Because the desire and the discipline aren't there.

There are millions of things that you could do with yourself, and plenty of things that I'm sure youi would like to do, so don't say that you have no dreams. If anything, you have more dreams than you could fit into one lifetime.

What you're looking for is not your dreams - because I'm sure you see them in your head every time you have a free moment - but the desire and discipline to get up, go out, and live them.
 

drixsa

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Originally posted by Nocturnal
drixsa:

I thought dreams hid in denial. I still do. But after consciously opening myself up to them, they remain hidden. Unless you are implying that I'm still in denial, in which case a more elaborate explanation is what would be most helpful.

what did you mean exactly by opening yourself up to your dreams?

i did not consider you in denail i answered the question (assuming the situation)

you don't seem to need more elaboration or do you?

Why is it that whenever I ask about why things aren't where I want them in my life, people point out my age and consider the matter settled?

because at this age many of us think we have it figured out, when in truth we have seen very little.

Yes I am young. But I didn't say I was patient. The most successful people in life are the ones who didn't sit around waiting for things to happen, or for the right moment to come. Why should I?

i am not requesting your patience but we all sit around in one way or another. Now I "sit and wait" for my degree so i can take the next step.

the general problem (myself included thus the last sentence in my original post) is that we spend to much time looking at the intricate details to really move forward. Just because you embrace a dream doesn't guarantee the dreams success or yours. What no one ever mentions is that many people that failed didn't sit around either.

Now i am not telling you which direction to take (simply becuase i don't have a clue into the details of your life), to stand up or to sit around.

But what i will tell you that trying to figure out answers to questions we don't understand is a waste.
 

ethnomethodologist

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Damn Nocturnal, are you always searching for your purpose?

Why not just pick one and be done with it?
 

insanity

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my dream hid from me in a piece of wood with six strings. once i learned how to play it, it spoke to me and said take that talent to the u.s.a.

when i walk into a guitar store. i just get this feeling that this is my calling.
it's not really a dream anymore because it is turning into more of a reality.

1 year till i head to the u.s.a. i'm scared, yet excited at the same time.
 

Nocturnal

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ethnomethodologist said:
Damn Nocturnal, are you always searching for your purpose?

Why not just pick one and be done with it?
Everyone has a purpose already, whether they know it or not. Every time you make a decision which will lead your life in one direction or the other, you are making that decision based on however your philosophy tells you to fulfill whatever purpose you have. For most people, there is the underlying purpose of trying to be happy. Although their philosophies are inevitably not completely solid, most people are smart enough to know that they will be happier if they eat than starve, happier if they sleep when they need to instead of stay awake, happier to earn money than to live without it.

The problem is that most people stop there. Most people can tell you what their beliefs and values are. Few people can provide a reasonable explanation for why they hold those beliefs and values. Ask a random individual if he values honesty. If he says yes, have him explain it. Few people can really do it. Usually they end up stopping somewhere like "because that's how I was raised."

I think the explanation for this is summed up rather well in the following passage:

"Apart from its many other evils, conventional morality is not concerned with the formatoin of a child's character. It does not teaach or show him what kind of man he ought to be and why; it is concerned only with imposing a set of rules upon him--concrete, arbitrary, contradictory rules, which are mainly prohibitions and duties. A child whose only notion of morality (i.e., of values) consists of such matters as: 'Wash your ears!'--'Don't be rude to Aunt Rosalie!'--'Do your homework!'--'Help papa to mow the lawn (or mama to wash the dishes)!'--faces the alternative of: either a passively amoral resignation, leading to a future of hopeless cynicism, or a blind rebellion."
Ayn Rand, 145-146 The Romantic Manifesto

Principles are absolutes. For a concept to become a principle, it must be true for all cases. To hold the concept that stealing is immoral as a principle, you must hold that stealing is immoral in all cases. No exceptions, no shades of gray. For me to believe in something that strongly, to make decisions based on principles that I know that I do not have to question -- ever -- I want a good reason for it. You are your principles. Why accept random ones on a whim?

Principles are generally based on the one, irreducible, primary goal that the individual has. This is usually the goal to be happy, fulfilled, satisfied, whatever you want to call it. Basically, over the course of their lifetimes, people want to feel as good as they can. This involves short term feelings like pleasure, and long term ones, which are usually more rewarding, such as fulfillment. When you know that you have this goal, you can use it as a rationale for holding certain principles and doing certain actions in the name of achieving the goal.

Following this is the idea of having a philosophy or belief system designed to help in fulfilling a primary goal through the use of a set of organized principles. When you know your irreducible, primary long term goal, you can say something like, "I believe in the principle of honesty because I know that in all cases, being dishonest compromises my goal." If you can rationally deduce that, then whenever you have to make a decision about whether you should be honest or dishonest, the answer is simple--you've already deterimined it. You don't have to go through the process of evaluating whether honesty is a good idea on a case-by-case basis, because you know that for all cases, it's a good idea. This is the nature of a principle. Throughout one's life, more and more principles can be developed, all contributing to one belief system and the success of one's goals.

This brings me to your question. Why don't I just "pick up a purpose and be done with it?"

The answer is, I know my purpose already. I know that every action I commit is going to be made in such a way that it will bring me as much happiness as possible. That is my purpose, which never took me long to figure out and is very clear. It gets fuzzier when answering the question of how I achieve that purpose. My success in achieving that purpose comes down to the integration of all of the decisions that I make in my entire lifetime. Every time there is a question of what I should do in a given situation, I can use the evidence I've observed to make a decision which will either put me a little bit closer to achieving my goal, or a little bit further away. Obviously I want to make decisions that put me closer.

So when I am faced with a decision that has very heavy consequences, I'm going to give it a lot of consideration. Choosing a career can certainly have very heavy consequences--for better or for worse. Sometimes people don't give it much thought, and they end up being miserable for it. Some people think that every career will be roughly the same--something they will hate--so they give up before they start. The only meaning or value that your life can have to you is the meaning and value that you give to it or create for it. The more you put in, the more you will get out. I don't want to live life as if I'm sitting in a waiting room listening for death to call my name. I don't plan on having a career as a necessary burden that I have to deal with just to survive, but a medium for me to make my greatest achievements.

When I originally made this thread, I was at a point in my life where things weren't clicking for me but I so badly wanted them to. I wanted something to be passionate about that I could devote myself to. But I made the mistake of thinking that that can happen instantaneously. derEikopf was exactly right when he said that dreams are products of thought and reason. They must be constructed. When I made this post, I was on track to complete a computer science and business double major, with a greater focus in computer science. Then I started thinking about why I was enrolled in those two programs. Computer science was easy--I'd always had a lot of exposure to computers and my father's projects as a programmer; I'd already experienced part of it and knew that I liked it. The plan was also to get a degree in business so that I could work for myself and work independently. But I really wasn't liking what I was seeing in class and I came to the conclusion that I'd rather do work that I love, under an employer, with a smaller wage, than struggle to make a living working for myself doing management. I dropped business right away and started thinking about other possibilities. A friend mentioned engineering, and the wheels started turning. I thought about the different things engineering would have to offer, such as the chance to solve problems and design things. It seemed like a good match, so I started an engineering major. It's a big commitment (I also have to do an extra year of undergrad), but I am already feeling the benefits so I don't have any hesitation or regret. When I hear of all of the innovative breakthroughs throughout the sciences (including engineering), I find myself intruiged at the possibility of doing something similar. The deeper I go into my studies, the more I can understand how some people really are living their dreams and doing work that they love, which is exactly what I want.

So, once again, to answer your question: if I were to just "pick up a purpose and be done with it," I would be making one of the biggest mistakes of my life.
 

ethnomethodologist

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Well, that certainly is a unique "end all, be all" argument, to make a decision, would be the biggest mistake of my life. Like letting life wash over you, there's no dream in that process, it's just logic leading your brain to allow you to live within your principles. I originally thought, and heard arguments that coincided with the thought, that you wanted to live more dreams, but you could not find them.

Have you now begun to realize your dreams?

I constructed this argument, as always, before hearing the final statement. Something that men and women are generally known to do. In reality, the statement comes first, women tend to desire emotions, so reason comes first, with men, reason is far enough, and statements come after the fact.

Here it goes, read my first quote for instructions.

I am the product of my childhood, my prior thoughts and convictions in life. I have countless negative and positive memorys. I was regarded as rather intelligent, creative and athletic and as a result I took on an attitude of being lazy and feeling unchallenged. I would actively shy away from attention in order to fit in and downplay my talents and achievements. I did everything possible to prevent my distinction from my peers.

I hit puberty full at 16 and went utterly insane for a good 2 years, 1 part curious, 2 parts testosterone and many parts apathy and detachment. I’m still not sure exactly what the problem was, but it is still with me. Looking back it seems like a big game that just got way out of hand. What can we get away with, what limit remains unbroken? It is a little scary and I can’t totally explain it yet. I’m glad I made it through, though without a little luck and a lot of help I’m not so sure I would of.

The Sosuave community, the members within, connected with my thoughts and desires. Few times have I read articles that meant so much to me. This is the only place that argued against absolute acceptance and absolute pessimism in a mature manner. Though, these days, maturity is something to be argued about.

I found that I draw most of my energy from new knowledge, being able to use the knowledge, and confirming the knowledge. Experience plays a vital role in my life, new experiences are my dream, my dreams manifest themselves in ways I dare not decieve, so I stay open to everything.

The only time I become irate, is when my dreams are impeded by extenuating circumstances, things I CANNOT control... I learned, that I am happy with my life.

The thing that bothers me, is I know I can be happier. I believe that is what you search for as well. It's the internal greed factor in all of us, we seek to be happier, and neglect others happiness in the process.

AFC's are wrought with this type of thinking, but they believe they are being kind while doing so.

This post would still have been helpful to me with no replies at all.
Here's an indication of what consitutes your dreams. The fact that you also used this as an argument shows your desire to, well argue.

Denial and understanding lie in so many different areas of your life. to see one point, you must neglect another. It's just basically the way your mind works. Once everything is congruent within your mind, you draw happiness from it.

A murderer can go for years and be happy killing people, than one day in jail, and he shoots himself.

One thing I see you consistently do, is avoiding making your dreams heard. You stifle your dreams with questions, and say "i'll get back to it later". I don't see how that is in any way productive.

I don't know how else to say it, it's ineffible...

"stop looking for answers"

Every time there is a question of what I should do in a given situation, I can use the evidence I've observed to make a decision which will either put me a little bit closer to achieving my goal, or a little bit further away. Obviously I want to make decisions that put me closer.
Does this realte to your values and principles? I'm sure it does, the tracks in your mind overlap millions of times in the process of making decisions. To live life fully, you must choose to take the good plan NOW, instead of the PERFECT plan tomorrow. Afterwards, you evaluate your decision, and make a more logical answer the next time you encounter the system.

Your dreams flow from your emotions, literally, it draws memory's and thoughts from your cortex, and translates them into memorys. When you dream, your body interprets the days proceedings accordingly. Your logic and emotions coincide with eachother, and are compared to patterns. If you force the new logic or emotion upon the old pattern, you begin to change your thinking. If you allow the emotions to take control, you induce insanity. Sleep, as you said, is needed in puruit of happiness, because sleep allows us to mainatin control of our logic, without sleep, our PRIMITVE minds take over, our emotions, and survival instincts are in control. The instincts are changeable though, that's where reasoning comes into play, reasoning is ingrained in your mind, deeper than logic.

Your argument for your choice of lifestyle is great, informed, and desirable. I cannot argue with it. You rounded off the argument with inspiration, an admiral deed, one of the things that are in my dreams, that I cannot manifest.
 

KillingTime

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All my dreams were lies.
Ive had a major, major change of heart these past six months... I'm a new person.
Only a year ago my dream was to go into business, I wanted to make it big.
I can't stand it now, the boredom I would go through would not be worth it, all the money in the world wouldn't make up for it.
Looking back it wasn't really my dream, it was pressure from society more than anything.

I'm still getting a degree but I don't plan on using it, I've discovered that I'm a very deep person that questions everything, I can't live day to day for the rest of my life living a typical lifestyle, I would go insane... I don't know where the hell I'm going but i'll tell you this much:
I could be a pastry chef, a pornstar or a lumberjack... all I know is I'm not going to do the typical corporate gig that was once my dream, I would rather live under a bridge then spend my days in some cubicle. I don't care if I have to take a vow of poverty... it's what will make me happy.

I'm only 21 now, but ever since high school I had felt so lost about what I wanted to do, I'm FINALLY starting to realize what it is after tons of soul searching.
 

bauer_23

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ethnomethodologist said:
Damn Nocturnal, are you always searching for your purpose?

Why not just pick one and be done with it?
to search for a purpose is human. I don't believe there is a purpose to anything. To say there is would be as inane as trying to decipher why gravity is an attractive force, or something like that. Things are the way they are. nothing happens for a reason.

I think mediocrity is too hard for people to accept, which is why people invent a self fulfilling purpose in life. I am content knowing that while my life will never be significant, it will be fun with friends, doing what I want.

My dream is simple: to be content with whatever life I live.
 

Nocturnal

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I'm not even sure whether you agree with me or disagree with me, so if I interpret some of what you have said incorrectly let me know.

ethnomethodologist said:
Well, that certainly is a unique "end all, be all" argument, to make a decision, would be the biggest mistake of my life. Like letting life wash over you, there's no dream in that process, it's just logic leading your brain to allow you to live within your principles. I originally thought, and heard arguments that coincided with the thought, that you wanted to live more dreams, but you could not find them.
Why is it so hard to understand that logic can be used in conjunction with emotional motivation? The reason that I explained why I use logic to live within my principles was to show that it would be a mistake to take my life in the direction that any random whim points me in. If I am not behind my dreams, then they cannot be my dreams. Picking up some arbirtary purpose would be self-defeating.

ethnomethodologist said:
Have you now begun to realize your dreams?
Yes. And I would not have, if I had just taken your advice of picking one.

ethnomethodologist said:
I constructed this argument, as always, before hearing the final statement. Something that men and women are generally known to do. In reality, the statement comes first, women tend to desire emotions, so reason comes first, with men, reason is far enough, and statements come after the fact.
I'm not really sure what you're talking about. What argument? What statement? And are you saying that men generally don't have problem with letting their emotions contradict reason?

ethnomethodologist said:
The thing that bothers me, is I know I can be happier. I believe that is what you search for as well. It's the internal greed factor in all of us, we seek to be happier, and neglect others happiness in the process.

AFC's are wrought with this type of thinking, but they believe they are being kind while doing so.
I don't see a problem with being driven by that internal greed factor (selfishness). Without it, I would have no motivation to even continue living. I exist only for myself.

I don't see a problem with neglecting others in the process. Kindness is not a virtue or a requirement, it is a courtesy. Neglect is different than direct harm, you aren't infringing on anyone's rights so there is no problem.

ethnomethodologist said:
Here's an indication of what consitutes your dreams. The fact that you also used this as an argument shows your desire to, well argue.
That's assuming that only benefit I can get out of posting this is whatever joy I derive from arguing, which is not true. Discussion serves many purposes, not only entertainment. By inviting people to discuss it, I might see the situation in a new light or consider something I hadn't thought about. At the same time, I still got something out of the post just by writing it.

ethnomethodologist said:
Denial and understanding lie in so many different areas of your life. to see one point, you must neglect another. It's just basically the way your mind works. Once everything is congruent within your mind, you draw happiness from it.

A murderer can go for years and be happy killing people, than one day in jail, and he shoots himself.
When you say "you," are you speaking in general terms or specifically to me? I will respond as though you were talking about me.

I don't understand what denial you are talking about. "To see one point, you must neglect another." If by neglect you mean to ignore a necessary point, then I don't see any evidence to support your statement. If you mean that you can't hold thousands of concepts in the focus of your consciousness simultaneously, then I agree, but I don't see how that correlates with denial, or what your example of a murderer has to do with anything.

ethnomethodologist said:
One thing I see you consistently do, is avoiding making your dreams heard. You stifle your dreams with questions, and say "i'll get back to it later". I don't see how that is in any way productive.

I don't know how else to say it, it's ineffible...

"stop looking for answers"
I don't think you see enough of me for that to be a qualified statement. Just because the posts I make here may be focused on a few select ideas or topics does not mean that I dwell about them throughout my daily life. And there is nothing wrong with looking for answers, that is what has built civilization.

ethnomethodologist said:
Does this realte to your values and principles? I'm sure it does, the tracks in your mind overlap millions of times in the process of making decisions. To live life fully, you must choose to take the good plan NOW, instead of the PERFECT plan tomorrow. Afterwards, you evaluate your decision, and make a more logical answer the next time you encounter the system.
While this is often the case, plans that have heavy long term consequences deserve some time to think about them. Whenever you make an investment (in this case you're investing your time, as building a career takes an enormous amount of time), you need to make sure you're not putting yourself at too much risk. If you were making a $50 investment, it might be ok to make a quick decision. But would you do the same thing if you were buying a house or $50,000 in stocks?

ethnomethodologist said:
Your dreams flow from your emotions, literally, it draws memory's and thoughts from your cortex, and translates them into memorys. When you dream, your body interprets the days proceedings accordingly. Your logic and emotions coincide with eachother, and are compared to patterns. If you force the new logic or emotion upon the old pattern, you begin to change your thinking. If you allow the emotions to take control, you induce insanity. Sleep, as you said, is needed in puruit of happiness, because sleep allows us to mainatin control of our logic, without sleep, our PRIMITVE minds take over, our emotions, and survival instincts are in control. The instincts are changeable though, that's where reasoning comes into play, reasoning is ingrained in your mind, deeper than logic.
Reasoning is using logic. http://www.answers.com/reason look at definition 7. Also, men don't have instincts. I think what you may be talking about is the effect of habit. Once you spend enough time living under certain logical conclusions, your emotions do begin to coincide with those evaluations. I think this is the harmony you are speaking of.


ethnomethodologist said:
Your argument for your choice of lifestyle is great, informed, and desirable. I cannot argue with it. You rounded off the argument with inspiration, an admiral deed, one of the things that are in my dreams, that I cannot manifest.
Inspiration comes from knowing there is always more to be gained.


KillingTime: Sometimes it is just a hard thing to figure out. The good thing is, you didn't give up and stick with it, leaving yourself miserable for the rest of your life. Consider the time and effort you spent on going into business as part of the process of discovering what you really wanted to do.

bauer_23: You are already admitting that your life has meaning and that you have a purpose. Your purpose is to be comfortable, which, while not an very admirable goal, is still a goal with meaning nonetheless. Choosing mediocrity is choosing to choke off part of your soul. You get as much as out of life as you put into it. I do not believe that I will exist indefinitely. But that's not stopping me from striving to do great things while I'm still here.
 

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Visceral said:
There are millions of things that you could do with yourself, and plenty of things that I'm sure youi would like to do, so don't say that you have no dreams. If anything, you have more dreams than you could fit into one lifetime.

What you're looking for is not your dreams - because I'm sure you see them in your head every time you have a free moment - but the desire and discipline to get up, go out, and live them.

Well put Vincent. It's not enough to have a dream, you have to have balls and integrity to follow your dreams where ever they lead you. Hard yet smart work is the way to acheive in life. Having a dream can inspire you but if you don't follow up with the necessary work behind it then your dream will die like a fern in the mojave. If you can't or won't persue your dream with 100% mental and phycial commitment then you really didn't want to do it anyway.
 
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