"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Dopamine detox?

oOh Nasty

Master Don Juan
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I've tried it several times in the past, but I usually never get past a day and a half. What I've definitely observed is that after a good 4 or 5 hours of having my TV turned off, phone put away, laptop lid closed, and any other distracting things, my mental state feels more clear and focused. Refraining from checking social media, checking forums *cough sosuave*, or any other quick-fix dopamine things leads to this strange peaceful state of boredom where my mind is more receptive to things coming at me and I have this sense of stronger mental willpower and ability to resist temptation and time-wasting activities. Once in this state, I find that my relationship to temptations is similar to my relationship to hunger during intermittent fasting in that temptation is there, but it's so miniscule and easy to overcome in comparison to a normal situation (checking reddit, instagram, etc. every half hour or more, or constantly snacking and/or having multiple meals per day).

I've given myself a pretty intense deadline for my biz. It would require that I'm in a near perfect mental state. It's true what they say about office workers - that they only work a percentage of the time they're on the clock. I'm no different, admittedly. Once I start down the path of opening up instagram, or reddit, or whatever, I'll end up searching for that dopamine rush again within 15 to 30 minutes. I'll mindlessly check e-mail, turn on YouTube, open up a dating app and just start swiping, or some other time-wasting sh*t that I don't really need to be doing. Sure, just sitting down and doing nothing is the same as not being productive anyways, but atleast I won't be digging myself down a dopamine hole. And for some reason, I never regret staring out of my living room office window (I have a nice view of trees and lots of sky).

My plan is to, upon getting an urge to do a dopamine quick-fix activity, just simply not do it and sit still instead and see what happens.

Dopamine quick fixes for me are things like: Checking e-mail when I don't need to, opening up news apps, turning on the TV to watch YT vids that have nothing to do with my current business objective, opening up one of my messaging apps to randomly scroll to see people's updates, opening up any kind of SM app, viewing pr0n, looking for something to snack on just because I'm bored, and lots of other things. Each person individually will know exactly what these things are for themselves.

I'll also have to resist being sidetracked on these SM apps (because I do need to work on my business instagram and facebook, etc) and messaging apps and to make sure to only do messaging that has anything to do with work.

One thing that I want to expand upon is that "peaceful boredom" feeling once you're no longer hungry for dopamine. My first few experiments of detoxing and coming upon this feeling made me feel a slight angst. It's in no way a negative feeling after some hindsight. But back then, after a few hours of it, I'd end up thinking I deserved some kind of small reward and ended up pouring myself a drink or going to the bar with a friend. And quite predictably, I'd somehow end up back in my dopamine-craving phase. This feeling of clarity and stillness is quite boring indeed, but it far outweighs the alternative and I have a theory that my life may improve dramatically if I'm able to harness the benefits of this state of mind.. I'll be looking forward to it and I'd like to see how long I can stay in this focused state.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Black Widow Void

Master Don Juan
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Good luck!
I recognize my own as well.
Here's someone that spoke and planned to do the same. Haven't seen any recent updates form this member.

 

RBK

Senior Don Juan
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This is why I've been buying books in paperback and keeping my phone in another room. We spend FAR too much time on electronic devices. No wonder why everyones depressed.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Dust 2 Dust

Master Don Juan
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I like to shut my phone off for entire days as a break. I also dont use social media or watch the news outside of a few youtube videos. Our brains arent designed to be bombarded with all these status and news updates. "Being Informed" doesnt really make any difference in anything.
Same thing goes for pornography. Our brains arent designed for the amount of sexual imagery on demand the internet offers. IMO there is a correlation between heavy porn usage and erectile disfunction. Shut off the devices go for a walk lift weights and be mindful. Cutout the consumerist noise and become a minimalist.
 
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