"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Don't want to DJ

.illadelph

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i don't want to be a DJ with all the pimp-game in the world to get in all the girls panties when and where he wants to. i simply want more female friends. that alone would boost my self-esteem big time. i try to befriend any girl that i feel has the qualities deserving of my time. it's hard, because as men - we're meant to be the initiators, but it's tough. i simply want to be able to hangout with more females. sure i can talk to them in school or whatever, but i wanna be able to hangout with them outside of school.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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comic_relief

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go for it then. Don't have to enlighten us with your goals in life. Good luck. Check out the DJ bible conversational areas. Take baby steps into the world of a social life. Good luck
 

.illadelph

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i'll stop with all the goals, and where i want to be. thanks for the advice.
 

triple_ultima

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I have almost no female friends and I enjoy it. Girls are too much trouble; I can only handle one at a time. Quite frankly, I get nothing from hanging out with girls that I couldn't get more of by hanging out with guys. I'm not exactly saying that girls are worthless to have as friends, but I wouldn't advise you to go out of your way to make them. The best "girl" friends, in my experience, tend to be the girls who are going out with my guy friends.
 

08aisaac

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Well, The thing about Don Juan system, is that, it isn't about getting girls, it's about improvement, not focusing on girls, and I think it has the same theme's as Buddhism.

Like self improvement, dettachment from needieness, happieness that is derived from your inner self.

And most guys follow this in search of being able to get women, but it is really about a whole new mindset.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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DJ4Real

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Yeah, this isn't a site to learn how to be a "pimp". I mean, the things that we use can help someone be a pimp, if that's what they want to be. But all we do here are things to improve ones' self. Me, personally, I'm not looking to be a pimp.
 

Phat

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wow.. all u gotta do to become a girls friend is suck up to them and give them money and act just like one of thier girlfriends.
 

AB500

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wow.. all u gotta do to become a girls friend is suck up to them and give them money and act just like one of thier girlfriends.
Nu uh! :)


Being a Don Juan isn't about just getting women, its self improvement. If you learn this stuff you'll have a hell of an easier time just interacting with people in general and you will be a better person.

That being said I'm going to agree with
triple_ultima about the friends thing, don't get too many female friends, its a pain. Of course having one or two can bring a female viewpoint to the table, something that guys can't. Plus its fun to test new methods and techniques on them before you bring them into your personality to see how they react.
 

DJ4Real

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Originally posted by Phat
wow.. all u gotta do to become a girls friend is suck up to them and give them money and act just like one of thier girlfriends.
ONLY IF you're looking for prostitutes or gold diggers! But if you want a relationship, NEVER EVER try to win a womans' heart by giving them money.
 

Smooth Player 056

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Originally posted by DJ4Real
ONLY IF you're looking for prostitutes or gold diggers! But if you want a relationship, NEVER EVER try to win a womans' heart by giving them money.
I dont think he means tying to win a girls heart....I think he means just to become a girls friend.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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MetalFortress

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Originally posted by .illadelph
i don't want to be a DJ with all the pimp-game in the world to get in all the girls panties when and where he wants to. i simply want more female friends. that alone would boost my self-esteem big time. i try to befriend any girl that i feel has the qualities deserving of my time. it's hard, because as men - we're meant to be the initiators, but it's tough. i simply want to be able to hangout with more females. sure i can talk to them in school or whatever, but i wanna be able to hangout with them outside of school.
Erm, are you gay? What guy DOESN'T want more attraction from females?
 

DJ_in_making

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It's good to have female friends. To me its a huge confidence booster and helps with my communication. B/c w/ guys communication comes naturally but w/ girls, you gotta get the conversation going.
 

DJ4Real

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Originally posted by Smooth Player 056
I dont think he means tying to win a girls heart....I think he means just to become a girls friend.
Yeah, I realize that now. Same rules still apply though, but instead of being ****y and funny he should be a bit "nicer" being "nice" is sure way to get him straight into that friendship zone. No giving women money....he'll give off the vibe that he's desperate for a friend.
 

.illadelph

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that comment was pretty uneccesary, metal fortress. where did i say that i don't want attraction from females? don't twist my words man. i'm said that i want more female friends. i understnad the drama that girls carry as baggage, but most of the girls i befriend are pretty intelligent and have ambition. i normally don't become friends with materialistic, gold digging type. btw, i've never had a girlfriend, so i don't reallly have much experience, but i know i can learn from other peoples.
 

DJ4Real

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I have experience with women. If you need some help, just ask, that's why we are here.:cool:
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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MetalFortress

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Originally posted by .illadelph
where did i say that i don't want attraction from females?
You said you JUST wanted female friends. In fact, you said it here:
i simply want more female friends.
Making female friends is easy, and done pretty similarly to making guy friends.
 

DJ4Real

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Well, whatever he wants, he just has to specify. If he wants females to be attracted to him, and eventually go out with him, then he has to act like more like a DJ. But if he wants just friends then he knows how to make regular friends. From the title of the post, he doesn't want to be a "DJ". He just wants and would rather make friends.
 

Kidd

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Originally posted by .illadelph
i don't want to be a DJ with all the pimp-game in the world to get in all the girls panties when and where he wants to. i simply want more female friends. that alone would boost my self-esteem big time. i try to befriend any girl that i feel has the qualities deserving of my time. it's hard, because as men - we're meant to be the initiators, but it's tough. i simply want to be able to hangout with more females. sure i can talk to them in school or whatever, but i wanna be able to hangout with them outside of school.
I don't think you grasp the concept of "DJ"
 
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