Reyaj
Master Don Juan
me too. This is a great thread. No doubt
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Don't wait for a sign of interest.
- Thread starter squirrels
- Start date
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
I knew this one girl who was fairly hot, and I tried kino on her...A LOT. And she never did reciprocate. She didn't blow me off by any means, but she never reciprocated.
So yeah, the possibility of an attention wh0re is very real.
Randallpink83
Master Don Juan
werd, great post! Thanks.
Paintballguy
Master Don Juan
great post! This definitely happens a lot with guys. I don't know how many times I've heard friends say stuff like, "oh there is no way she is into me".
Squirrel, do you ever hit any clubs in Baltimore up? I usually go up to the powerplant area every once in awhile.
Squirrel, do you ever hit any clubs in Baltimore up? I usually go up to the powerplant area every once in awhile.
just another newb??
Don Juan
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superb...i have messed this up many times.
"unless you put your full ego on the line, there can be no growth"
because if you keep playing it safe... ul just get nowhere
"unless you put your full ego on the line, there can be no growth"
because if you keep playing it safe... ul just get nowhere
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
unnamed04
Don Juan
If you disagree with the purpose of the post by Squrrels then you are an AFC plain and simple. Of course they'll give you some sign of intrest, otherwise you wouldn't be out on a date with them.
When it comes to women, anything but a NO is a YES. Assume everything is a test. Rejecting yourself is so common I used to do it all the time.
Here is my very recent story about the exact topic. I hadn't read this post before hand, because this exact thing is a SIDE EFFECT OF BEING A MAN!
I had a date with a girl two days ago. She's a couple of years older than me (22 vs 20) average face but hot body. I'm far from a good looking guy, skinny as ****, average face (crap skin), average hair and clothing, but i make up for it with a nice smile, nice eyes, INNER CONFIDENCE, and a genuine interest in other people.
Anyway - We'd hung out in a group of 4 with another guy and girl from where I work. We got along well so I asked her to hang out one day. She agreed, although on the phone it sounded like she was a little reluctant as I really had no plans and didn't hide it at all (there's not much to do in my town).
Date came along, and she didn't give any explicit signs of interest. I made plenty of mistakes, not advancing the conversation past boring topics, and pretty much not doing anything other than being my silly self with playful kino.
We climbed a nice tall tower and walked around for a while having a chat. Driving around (her driving me) trying to find something to do (more mistakes on my behalf, but I digress) she tells me about some tower/momument thing around where we are. I've never heard of it but apparently it's cool. She says it lights up at night time. I ask if she's hungry and we go get some food and eat it by the beach (in the car as it's ****ing freezing outside) with the plan to come back to the momument when it's dark.
OPPORTUNITY was created. She is allowing herself to be with me in the dark just the two of us. As mentioned in Squirrels post, a girl will create opportunities for you, but won't seal the deal. In the end, it's going to be the MAN who takes ACTION.
Running up a hill to a nice spot under the stars, grab her by the hand and lead, she lets go once we get to the top - who cares. She walks up to the 'thing', so I stand behind her and stand close holding her around the waist and speak softly into her ear. Still nothing positive so I continue.
We sit down on the side of the hill overlooking the whole city we live in. It really was an amazing view i've never seen before (and a great spot for future prospects). I put my arm around her to keep her warm and she pulls in close. We sit and talk for a while, but we're both a little restless and she pulls in and out every now and then. So far I could have written myself off MANY times due to lack of positive signs, but that is completely self destructive and pointless. We move to the other side of the hill where the grass is softer and we lie down. I hold her in my arms but she faces my chest. We lie for a while and the minute she faces me, 1 second eye contact, lean in a kiss her. We make out until our faces are numb from the freezing cold (ocean breeze). Get back in her car and drive to some other random place and make-out in the back of her car for a bit. I decide to end the date there. She messages me later that night saying what a great time she had. The end.
NO POSITIVE REACTION = KEEP GOING
NO NEGATIVE REACTION = KEEP GOING
BE A MAN AND TAKE WHAT YOU WANT OR YOU'LL REGRET IT FOREVER.
I take no responsibility for any brain tumours you get from attempting to read my post; I just typed it as it comes out of my brain, which is FUBAR
When it comes to women, anything but a NO is a YES. Assume everything is a test. Rejecting yourself is so common I used to do it all the time.
Here is my very recent story about the exact topic. I hadn't read this post before hand, because this exact thing is a SIDE EFFECT OF BEING A MAN!
I had a date with a girl two days ago. She's a couple of years older than me (22 vs 20) average face but hot body. I'm far from a good looking guy, skinny as ****, average face (crap skin), average hair and clothing, but i make up for it with a nice smile, nice eyes, INNER CONFIDENCE, and a genuine interest in other people.
Anyway - We'd hung out in a group of 4 with another guy and girl from where I work. We got along well so I asked her to hang out one day. She agreed, although on the phone it sounded like she was a little reluctant as I really had no plans and didn't hide it at all (there's not much to do in my town).
Date came along, and she didn't give any explicit signs of interest. I made plenty of mistakes, not advancing the conversation past boring topics, and pretty much not doing anything other than being my silly self with playful kino.
We climbed a nice tall tower and walked around for a while having a chat. Driving around (her driving me) trying to find something to do (more mistakes on my behalf, but I digress) she tells me about some tower/momument thing around where we are. I've never heard of it but apparently it's cool. She says it lights up at night time. I ask if she's hungry and we go get some food and eat it by the beach (in the car as it's ****ing freezing outside) with the plan to come back to the momument when it's dark.
OPPORTUNITY was created. She is allowing herself to be with me in the dark just the two of us. As mentioned in Squirrels post, a girl will create opportunities for you, but won't seal the deal. In the end, it's going to be the MAN who takes ACTION.
Running up a hill to a nice spot under the stars, grab her by the hand and lead, she lets go once we get to the top - who cares. She walks up to the 'thing', so I stand behind her and stand close holding her around the waist and speak softly into her ear. Still nothing positive so I continue.
We sit down on the side of the hill overlooking the whole city we live in. It really was an amazing view i've never seen before (and a great spot for future prospects). I put my arm around her to keep her warm and she pulls in close. We sit and talk for a while, but we're both a little restless and she pulls in and out every now and then. So far I could have written myself off MANY times due to lack of positive signs, but that is completely self destructive and pointless. We move to the other side of the hill where the grass is softer and we lie down. I hold her in my arms but she faces my chest. We lie for a while and the minute she faces me, 1 second eye contact, lean in a kiss her. We make out until our faces are numb from the freezing cold (ocean breeze). Get back in her car and drive to some other random place and make-out in the back of her car for a bit. I decide to end the date there. She messages me later that night saying what a great time she had. The end.
NO POSITIVE REACTION = KEEP GOING
NO NEGATIVE REACTION = KEEP GOING
BE A MAN AND TAKE WHAT YOU WANT OR YOU'LL REGRET IT FOREVER.
I take no responsibility for any brain tumours you get from attempting to read my post; I just typed it as it comes out of my brain, which is FUBAR
At first I agreed to a point, but after you responded I agree 100%. Good post.squirrels said:To me, a girl accepting my date invitation is enough of an IOI.
I don't wait the socially acceptable three-days. I work fast and am always trying to get frisky with women who are attracted to me. That's all I meant by this post. It's kind of along the same lines as GWM..."Make the ho say no". Most women WILL give signs they're into you, but because of ASD, they don't overtly show signs that they wanna f*ck. That's where most guys assume DISinterest and back off, just when things are getting hot.
Technical1
Senior Don Juan
bump!!!!!! vital!!!
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
date is one thing -- here we can pretty much agree that untill you hear no u can go, but what about casual encounters? I always feel i can easily tell when a girl is into me, but when she's cold (we are talking strangers in a bar etc.) towards me i feel that the whole situation is a no go.
I'm looking to hear for more extreme examples such as Macca's.
I'm looking to hear for more extreme examples such as Macca's.
JackPrescott
Banned
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- 860
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Except if you are in a bar talking to a woman, and another man tried to interfere, he is to be sharply "*****slapped" so he will know his role around you.whistler said:
DismantleRepair
Don Juan
Thanks for the bumps. This is legendary advice.
JackPrescott
Banned
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- 860
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Great Advice. IF I can get a woman to accept a REAL date with me, without the "Friendszone" crap, yes, it's "Game on"....I am going in with the attitude that she does indeed want to sleep with me.squirrels said:To me, a girl accepting my date invitation is enough of an IOI.
I don't wait the socially acceptable three-days. I work fast and am always trying to get frisky with women who are attracted to me. That's all I meant by this post. It's kind of along the same lines as GWM..."Make the ho say no". Most women WILL give signs they're into you, but because of ASD, they don't overtly show signs that they wanna f*ck. That's where most guys assume DISinterest and back off, just when things are getting hot.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
ImpatientFire
Don Juan
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- 42
Preach on brother! This **** applies directly to me right now. I got a hot girl's number last week (HB 9.5) and she was all interested in me, smiling at me and everyhting but this week when I meet her she's still smiley but isn't acting as happy to see me as she was last week (or maybe it's just in my head lol) but it isn't discouraging me tho'. I already asked what she's doing this weekend and she says nothing. I asked if she wanted to hang out and she said yes and she told me to call her to set something up. So we are definitely going on a date this weekend lol but if I was waiting for her interest level to spike I wouldn't be anywhere by now. You gotta grab life by the horns and go for it! Chicks are strange creatures that don't know exactly what they want all the time so sometimes you have to already assume she's into you.
I also got the number of another chick I met today (HB 9). We talked for like a few minutes at the library, she seemed tired and lost but I still got her digits. She kinda looked shocked when I was asking for her number lol but I didn't care. I'm kinda feeling ****y and confident right now so the last thing on my mind is if a girl will say no. You gotta have confidence to survive with the ladies. If you don't have it, create it by telling yourself that you're the man and believing it. I'm a good looking guy (tall, dark, intelligent, athletic and all that good stuff) but I still get insecure around the ladies for no reason at all. Maybe it's the teasing I got as a kid for being too skinny but I've decided to brush that **** aside and go for it! I'm going to be going hard all the time and not looking back!
I also got the number of another chick I met today (HB 9). We talked for like a few minutes at the library, she seemed tired and lost but I still got her digits
. She kinda looked shocked when I was asking for her number lol but I didn't care. I'm kinda feeling ****y and confident right now so the last thing on my mind is if a girl will say no. You gotta have confidence to survive with the ladies. If you don't have it, create it by telling yourself that you're the man and believing it. I'm a good looking guy (tall, dark, intelligent, athletic and all that good stuff) but I still get insecure around the ladies for no reason at all. Maybe it's the teasing I got as a kid for being too skinny but I've decided to brush that **** aside and go for it! I'm going to be going hard all the time and not looking back!women haze
Senior Don Juan
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Holy crap...I needed to see this.
thecurtainfalls
Senior Don Juan
I remember reading this post years ago - it's so true and is still vitally important. You're the man, it's up to you to pull the trigger and make a move. If you refuse to risk the possibility of failure, you'll never gain the rewards that are yours for the taking.
What's the worst thing that can happen? I mean seriously, speaking from experience I can tell you that in my mega AFC days I had BOTH of these situations happen to me:
A) Got a cute girl (NOT interested in me) alone, escalated kino, went for the kiss, got blown out/LJBF'd
B) Got a cute girl alone (WAS interested in me), escalated kino, talked myself out of it because I wasn't getting any bash-you-over-the-head obvious signs of interest, and pu$$ied out only to talk for a little while longer then walk her to her car.
Guess which situation ultimately makes you feel worse? Guess which situation ended up making me look creepier?? Guess which situation would actually be remembered by the girl in the future? The time some guy manned up and tried to make a move on her (which has happened to her before, is flattering, and plus it shows you can grab your sack and man up)? Or the girl who had to sit in creepy silence with a guy while he non-verbally screamed that he was too scared to do anything (and socially illiterate to boot).
Usually like 4/5 times if you're even allowing yourself to strongly consider making a move, you're IN. Unless you have a tendency to delude yourself or the girl is an attention wh0re, your gut instinct combined with a girl's willingness to put herself in isolated proximity to you mean that you're good to go.
What's the worst thing that can happen? I mean seriously, speaking from experience I can tell you that in my mega AFC days I had BOTH of these situations happen to me:
A) Got a cute girl (NOT interested in me) alone, escalated kino, went for the kiss, got blown out/LJBF'd
B) Got a cute girl alone (WAS interested in me), escalated kino, talked myself out of it because I wasn't getting any bash-you-over-the-head obvious signs of interest, and pu$$ied out only to talk for a little while longer then walk her to her car.
Guess which situation ultimately makes you feel worse? Guess which situation ended up making me look creepier?? Guess which situation would actually be remembered by the girl in the future? The time some guy manned up and tried to make a move on her (which has happened to her before, is flattering, and plus it shows you can grab your sack and man up)? Or the girl who had to sit in creepy silence with a guy while he non-verbally screamed that he was too scared to do anything (and socially illiterate to boot).
Usually like 4/5 times if you're even allowing yourself to strongly consider making a move, you're IN. Unless you have a tendency to delude yourself or the girl is an attention wh0re, your gut instinct combined with a girl's willingness to put herself in isolated proximity to you mean that you're good to go.
Words of wisdom. Often times I've stopped because I was not eliciting a positive reaction from the girl so I wrote her off as uninterested when in reality she was just waiting for me to do work. Good sh!t man.unnamed04 said:
LOL we've all been there. It sucks.thecurtainfalls said:
facadegeniality
Don Juan
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bump...great post!
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.