Don't try to give chicks advice, right?

[madgame]

Should this rule only be applied if a girl is talking and talking..and well talking about her problems, but nor asking you what to do or also if shes talking and takling about her problems, but keeps asking you what to do?

Im asking this because of a female friend of mine (who im only friends with and thats fine with me) and she keeps running into guys who play her or arent ready for a relationship and then keeps asking me what to do..and well I try to give her advice and keep telling her "next him" (not with these words though ) but maybe this, too, is just talking and talking and asking for solutions but not really expecting to get an answer?

But then again...Girls do this all the time and I've always thought this was more of a "I'm a female, I need a strong man who can make a decision for me"..when they ask you WHAT to do..and not just talk about their problems...

 

[Wyldfire]

Most of the time when women talk about their problems they aren't looking for advice from anyone. Women tend to sort out what they should or will do about their problem while they're talking about it. Basically...they just want you to listen. If they actually ask you for advice you can offer it, but it might end up being a loaded question. Sometimes if you answer she'll get mad at you and it will lead to a fight. The best way to answer that question of "what should I do?" Is by saying, "Well what do YOU want to do?" or "What do you think you should do?" If you can lead her towards figuring it out for herself that is the best and safest bet.

Oh...and you should only be friends with a woman if the friendship is equal. If you're being her emotional tampon then she should also be your emotional tampon. If it's not equal and balanced then it's not really a friendship.

 

[Tazman]

If you're being her emotional tampon then she should also be your emotional tampon.

Seems logical, but the only problem with this is men tend not to need an emotional tampon. We usually keep things bottled up until we get so angry we explode!!! That, or cry like a baby.

 

[jprjrjr]

If you can be her tampon, she can be yours.

 

[brenbaus]

If you can find a girl that will actually listen to your problems and not tell you to "suck it up" or "deal with it", I applaude you, because it has been my expirenece that all women want is a man to be thier emtional tampon, and they could care less about your problems and what you have going on...

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by Tazman
Seems logical, but the only problem with this is men tend not to need an emotional tampon. We usually keep things bottled up until we get so angry we explode!!! That, or cry like a baby.

Yes, men need emotional tampons, too...and sometimes they biotch more than women do. My best friend is a man (a VERY manly man's man too) and there have been plenty of times where I've been his emotional tampon far more frequently than he's been mine. Men just tend to rant more, and don't really realize that they're basically doing the same thing women do when they complain about their problems. Being a whine arse in one form or another is not a feminine or masculine trait...it's a human trait.

 

[madgame]

Oh...and you should only be friends with a woman if the friendship is equal. If you're being her emotional tampon then she should also be your emotional tampon. If it's not equal and balanced then it's not really a friendship.

Don't worry, she's been my emotional tampoon before, too. Actually I have 3 female friends..or maybe 4 if I count my friend's g/f who I go to college with, too...and actually I have to say, all those friendships tend to be a bit more on my side, as they are never at my house but everytime I'm at their house or go out with them or anything, they offer me drinks and food lol..I mean seriously sometimes I've actually felt like I was taking advantage of them, though I'm not, because it's always like "I'll go to the supermarket before coming to your house" - "why?" - "because I still need to buy some alcohol" - "you don't need to we have enough to drink at home". Or when I go to their house they have everything prepared for the evening with food and little snacks or something all over...I guess they just have that mother type of instinct in them, that makes them want to cater to everyone.

If you can find a girl that will actually listen to your problems and not tell you to "suck it up" or "deal with it", I applaude you, because it has been my expirenece that all women want is a man to be thier emtional tampon, and they could care less about your problems and what you have going on...

I have to say with the (few) female friends I have, it's really not like that..but I have enough female acquaintances who are like that, too but I wouldnt call them friends..