Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Don't Need Advice, But Worth A Thread Anyways!

ENIGMA16

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So a few years ago back when I was working as a supervisor in the computer lab department at my university this girl started working there that was kind of cute but I never really thought about trying to get her number or anything, for whatever reason. Anyways, one day she started talking to me, because she saw I was reading a philosophy book and she started talking about how much she likes philosophy and said she had a book for me to read and ultimately ended up saying "we should hang out".

I ended up getting her number, but not too much came of it at first. She gave me the book to read and I read it and enjoyed it, but we didn't really hang out for a while. Anyways, it turned out that she lived like a block away from me with her boyfriend.

Now, I have absolutely no problem with hooking up with girls if they have boyfriends. The problem was, that I started hanging out with both of them and he started buying me beer. Lots of beer. As in, whenever I went out with him I would drink for free. This kind of threw a wrench in the whole thing because now I felt obligated to this guy so that I could keep getting free beer and because he's awesome for doing that.

So I was on the fence about making a move on her for forever. One night we all got blackout drunk, they got on a fight, and I ended up waking up in her bed and we were in our underwear, but I don't think anything happened whatsoever.

So that's about the way the situation was for a year or two. I'd hang out with her sometimes and we'd totally hit on each other, but I'd never be comfortable with making a move because her boyfriend was so cool towards me. So I somehow was able to keep her interest maintained for a really long time, probably because I didn't hang out with her that much.

Eventually she stopped calling me, and I stopped calling her. We didn't talk for a few weeks. I'd call her once in a while to see if she wanted to grab some lunch or come out with my friends but she wouldn't respond. So I was just thinking no big deal, I'm not really invested in it so whatever. We probably went two or three months without talking.

Then I run into them completely randomly at this block party. We all go to a bar and hang out with her boyfriend's friends. Keep in mind that both myself and her are really drunk. Shes giving me like pecks on the lip all night when her boyfriend's not looking. So finally, as I'm leaving we somehow ended up around the corner of the bar together and she gives me a peck and at that point I was just like fvck it and started making out with her.

We walk back to the bar to see what everyone else is doing, and as I'm starting to leave to walk home (I believe, again I was really drunk so I don't remember everything) her boyfriend walks up to me and confronts me about it. "Did you just kiss my girlfriend?" Obviously I deny it, and I don't remember what I said but I do remember being blown away at how convincing I was sounding hahaha. He tells me that his girlfriend told him about it, and that all of his friends saw, which I knew wasn't true. Anyways, I somehow get him calmed down and convince him that I have no idea what he's talking about. It was awesome.

Now we're back to her not really talking to me again. I think she doesn't want to talk to me or hang out with me because she knows that she'll end up cheating on her boyfriend if she does haha. We'll see how this ends; I don't really have anything invested in this but I thought it was pretty funny, and definitely at least worth a read. :D
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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yuppaz

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Just because you CAN do something doesn't always mean you should. Looks like you were drunk and that's why that happened, I get that but because the guy was so cool with you, you shouldn't be so happy about your lying abilities or the fact that you made out w/ her.
 

Real Talk

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JLay87 said:
Why? It's not a big deal...
A fellow young man in these difficult times sits you down and buys you a beer, and you pursue his woman?

Idiot.
 

ENIGMA16

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If a girl wants to cheat on her boyfriend it's no skin off my back. I'm not going to get in the middle of whatever her reasoning is.

If he was my friend it'd be a different story, obviously. Just because he buys me beer doesn't mean that I need to befriend him.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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jophil28

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JLay87 said:
He tells me that his girlfriend told him about it ...
Now why do you suppose that she did that ?
 

Iceberg

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JLay87 said:
If a girl wants to cheat on her boyfriend it's no skin off my back. I'm not going to get in the middle of whatever her reasoning is.

If he was my friend it'd be a different story, obviously. Just because he buys me beer doesn't mean that I need to befriend him.
I'd agree. This girl obviously isn't some innocent little flower and if it weren't you she was making out with, it'd be the next guy who showed her some attention.

I've actually been in your exact same situation. Meet a flirty chick for drinks, find out she has b/f...and b/f buys me drinks, which confused my attempts to bang the girl.

jophil28 said:
Now why do you suppose that she did that ?
Well there's a chance the boyfriend was lying just to get some answers. But there's an equally likely chance that this girl thrives on drama and attention. The "cheat-on-boyfriend-while-he's-20 feet away type" normally do.
 

ENIGMA16

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Iceberg said:
I'd agree. This girl obviously isn't some innocent little flower and if it weren't you she was making out with, it'd be the next guy who showed her some attention.

I've actually been in your exact same situation. Meet a flirty chick for drinks, find out she has b/f...and b/f buys me drinks, which confused my attempts to bang the girl.
And?

Iceberg said:
Well there's a chance the boyfriend was lying just to get some answers.
This is what happened for sure.

Iceberg said:
But there's an equally likely chance that this girl thrives on drama and attention. The "cheat-on-boyfriend-while-he's-20 feet away type" normally do.
Meh she isn't really the drama type. I think she was just completely wasted and her vagina got the best of her.
 
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