I've been dating this girl for almost 2 years now and all of the sudden she started talking to me about how she is scared, wants space, and doesn't want commitment at this time in her life. She says she doesn't know if she wants to break up but she wants to think about it over the weekend. Over this weekend she also told me not to call her so she can think about it more, and that if she wants to talk she will call me. What should I do? I'm really into this girl and I don't want her to leave me. What should I do to convince her to stay with me if anything. I'm really worried about losing her, she's an all around awesome girl (shes got the looks, brains, and personality). Please help!
Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single
She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.
You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.
The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.
Don't Know What To Do
- Thread starter danro
- Start date
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
DonGorgon
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 28, 2007
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Your time has run out my friend... Actually it ran out quite some time ago but she is choosing to let you know now since she has chosen her next mate already... OK so shes got the looks, brains, and personality.. but what she does not have is the desire to be with you..
WHAT SHOULD YOU DO?
Cut off all communication dont talk to her, treat her like the strainger that she has chosen to become..
Women often give subtle hints that they are over us that we ignore and then we have to go through what you are now... Next time dont wait.. dump her at the peak of her emotional attachement to you then you will have her as long as you want..
WHAT SHOULD YOU DO?
Cut off all communication dont talk to her, treat her like the strainger that she has chosen to become..
Women often give subtle hints that they are over us that we ignore and then we have to go through what you are now... Next time dont wait.. dump her at the peak of her emotional attachement to you then you will have her as long as you want..
I am very sorry to hear that this is happening to you.
Take it from someone who got the "I need space line" two months ago. It's over and there is nothing you can do to fix it.
You're not gonna want to hear this but you have to forget about anything you thought you two had together. Your past with this woman is irrelevant now. She has lost all interest in you and the remaining interest she has is dropping drastically every day. You have to forget all the times she looked you in the eyes and told you she loved you. The way she once felt about you and how she feels now are completely different
Let me ask you a question, would you tell a woman you loved and cared about that you need space from her?
please please please please take the dongorgons advice. Cut all contact with her right now. There is still a small chance you can save this if you cut all contact with her right now.
Don't make contact with her at all and ignore her for at least 2-3 months. If she is still calling after that amount of time and wants you back you can choose to take her back, but under your terms.
Also if you take her back make sure you make it clear to her not that her behavior is unacceptable and that by doing that she has lost exclusive rights to you and has to earn them back very slowly
Again there is about a 1% chance of getting her back because she most likely has someone else chosen now so don't get your hopes up.
Even if you can't get her back I promise you will feel so much better than if you chase her because it is only a matter of time until she delivers the final blow.
Trust me. I was in an almost identical situation to you two months ago, but instead of letting her go I got super clingy and tried to convince her how much she loved me. I made a thread on here and everyone told me the same thing "cut all contact and disappear", but I didn't listen. I told myself my situation was different and that she loved me. Now I am super depressed and can't stop thinking about her and I cry a lot because I can't control my emotions. I let her take my soul and self respect and now I have to build it all back up bit by bit.
Again I am sorry for this happening to you. A bad relationship is like cancer. If you stop it early enough you can heal it with only minor pain, however if you ignore it and do nothing then it will cripple you.
EDIT TO GET AROUND 10 POST LIMIT
Everything you said in the post below is irrelevant. She is already over you. Whenever a person pulls the "I need space" they have found someone else. The only exception for this is if you messed up really badly and physically or verbally abused her. The last thing a person "in love" wants is space from the person they supposedly love. It's like saying I love eating pizza, it's my favorite food therefore I won't order anymore of it.
I suggest you jump ship before it hits the ice berg. As I said above there is a tiny tiny chance of getting her back but you have to act fast and be strong. You have to cut contact for at least several months and focus on becoming a better man. Focus on becoming more muscular, more confident, richer, and more popular. Improve yourself and become better. Thats what I'm doing. You are going to feel powerless, but in reality you will be in complete control. Take it from me, I didn't follow this advice when it was given to me months ago and I'm paying for it dearly.
Don't take this personally either. You simply lost out to another man, it happens so don't be bitter about it. My plan is to improve myself so much that no matter how perfect my ex's next bf is, I will be superior to him in every way humanly possible. Even if I never see her again Knowing that is all the revenge I will need.
Take it from someone who got the "I need space line" two months ago. It's over and there is nothing you can do to fix it.
You're not gonna want to hear this but you have to forget about anything you thought you two had together. Your past with this woman is irrelevant now. She has lost all interest in you and the remaining interest she has is dropping drastically every day. You have to forget all the times she looked you in the eyes and told you she loved you. The way she once felt about you and how she feels now are completely different
Let me ask you a question, would you tell a woman you loved and cared about that you need space from her?
please please please please take the dongorgons advice. Cut all contact with her right now. There is still a small chance you can save this if you cut all contact with her right now.
Don't make contact with her at all and ignore her for at least 2-3 months. If she is still calling after that amount of time and wants you back you can choose to take her back, but under your terms.
Also if you take her back make sure you make it clear to her not that her behavior is unacceptable and that by doing that she has lost exclusive rights to you and has to earn them back very slowly
Again there is about a 1% chance of getting her back because she most likely has someone else chosen now so don't get your hopes up.
Even if you can't get her back I promise you will feel so much better than if you chase her because it is only a matter of time until she delivers the final blow.
Trust me. I was in an almost identical situation to you two months ago, but instead of letting her go I got super clingy and tried to convince her how much she loved me. I made a thread on here and everyone told me the same thing "cut all contact and disappear", but I didn't listen. I told myself my situation was different and that she loved me. Now I am super depressed and can't stop thinking about her and I cry a lot because I can't control my emotions. I let her take my soul and self respect and now I have to build it all back up bit by bit.
Again I am sorry for this happening to you. A bad relationship is like cancer. If you stop it early enough you can heal it with only minor pain, however if you ignore it and do nothing then it will cripple you.
EDIT TO GET AROUND 10 POST LIMIT
Everything you said in the post below is irrelevant. She is already over you. Whenever a person pulls the "I need space" they have found someone else. The only exception for this is if you messed up really badly and physically or verbally abused her. The last thing a person "in love" wants is space from the person they supposedly love. It's like saying I love eating pizza, it's my favorite food therefore I won't order anymore of it.
I suggest you jump ship before it hits the ice berg. As I said above there is a tiny tiny chance of getting her back but you have to act fast and be strong. You have to cut contact for at least several months and focus on becoming a better man. Focus on becoming more muscular, more confident, richer, and more popular. Improve yourself and become better. Thats what I'm doing. You are going to feel powerless, but in reality you will be in complete control. Take it from me, I didn't follow this advice when it was given to me months ago and I'm paying for it dearly.
Don't take this personally either. You simply lost out to another man, it happens so don't be bitter about it. My plan is to improve myself so much that no matter how perfect my ex's next bf is, I will be superior to him in every way humanly possible. Even if I never see her again Knowing that is all the revenge I will need.
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Don't know if this changes anything but we where talking and she said breaking up would be the worst case scenario. She said she would rather see how the Summer goes and keep a good amount of space but still see each other... but she still wants to think. Can anyone translate this? Is she being sincere? Also I could use this to stay together but ignore her as much as possible, like you said to do, and if she still is contacting me by the end of the Summer I'll give her another chance.
I think this situation is completely obvious, and I hate to say it so bluntly, but this chick is over you and even if she does want to stay together this weekend you need to bail FAST.
Read into a chicks mind for a second here. Why does she need a weekend to think about it? Basically, she has another guy lined up and she is about to move on to him - she just hasn't closed the deal yet so she wants you there in case things don't go according to plan.
I know it sucks, but you'll be best served by moving on now. Don't let her string you along for as long as possible so she has a fallback boyfriend.
Read into a chicks mind for a second here. Why does she need a weekend to think about it? Basically, she has another guy lined up and she is about to move on to him - she just hasn't closed the deal yet so she wants you there in case things don't go according to plan.
I know it sucks, but you'll be best served by moving on now. Don't let her string you along for as long as possible so she has a fallback boyfriend.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
MacAvoy
Banned
The following post is considered the authority on the board regarding breaks
Click her e to read Joekerr31's thread on BREAKS
Click her e to read Joekerr31's thread on BREAKS
In response to Joekerr31's post and the example of an employer that "kinda" lays you off.....I actually had that happen. I was put in the "surge pool". Laid off. Sucked.
But....just as I was landing another job, they called back and said "We'd love you have you back."
In a nice way....I told them to fvck off. Rather gratifying. They tried getting me back several more times. Like the AFCs they are. Got a great job now.
But....just as I was landing another job, they called back and said "We'd love you have you back."
In a nice way....I told them to fvck off. Rather gratifying. They tried getting me back several more times. Like the AFCs they are. Got a great job now.