"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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dont know how to progress with this girl help plz

smoothtalker72

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ok i've been talking to this girl for a couple of months, i know shes interested but i feel like im stuck. i did ask her out but like i said in another topic theres a lot in the way of that (work school sports). how should i work on progressing this past just talking. i dont want her to get bored with me and just move on.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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smoothtalker72

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we hang out at work and on breaks but nothing outside of work because of school work sports and her parents. i guess what im trying to say is, is she going to end up bored with me if we dont get the chance to go out relatively soon? like initially we used to talk almost daily but now we talk less and less. i can tell shes still into me but getting bored because we havent been able to do much in the form of dating.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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john paul

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aka Shes getting bored because she isnt getting any

I know it sucks but that means you have to make a move on her and possibly even get head, God forbid.

Gotta hang out with her alone and show her why it would be dumb to get bored of you.
 

smoothtalker72

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thats whats so difficult about the situation, i cant get her alone too often because we only see each other at work, we go to different schools. and even at work its only for a few minutes at a time because we work in different areas. they stopped letting us go on breaks together and it looks like we wont be scheduled together anymore either because someone "hinted" to the managers that there was something going on between us.
 

Cry For Love

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is there any reason to keep trying it with her? if its too much trouble to go through just seek the next one (away from work, that is!).
 

smoothtalker72

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we get along well and have alot in common. i really wanna give her a try but i know it shouldnt be this difficult.
 

Bryce556

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hang out outside of work or school.... give her a ride home. or just simly ask her to come hang out at a movie or when your doing somthing with friends. encorperate her into your daily things or events you go to. Going to a thing (sports,golfing,shopping) with your dad or mom or friends? invite her along.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Teh_Wolf

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dude i just went ice skating with some girls this weekend. they hadnt done it very many times and were terrible, its alot of fun lol :p
 

smoothtalker72

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ok so i was talking to the same girl today, told her i was going to the movies and invited her to come along but i never got an answer. the conversation took place via texts, she texted me after she got home from work. anyway that kinda pissed me off so i figured id just ignore her for the rest of the week. normally id see her on saturday but im not going to be working this saturday so i may not see her until next week. i dont know the circumstances as to why i never got an answer, i just pretty much assumed she ignored me. should i just wait a couple more days and try to call her or should i go through with my original plan and just put her on ice until the next time i see her or the next time she tries to get in contact with me? and if i do decide to call her should i ask her why she didnt respond to my invitation or just play it off?
 

2.0

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I think it's pretty obvious that you should definitely not initiate contact with her until she contacts you first. Also, being the confident man that you are, you don't really care that she didn't respond to your offer about the movie... she has no effect on your self-worth. Thus, you have no reason to bring it up because you are not insecure about it.
 

smoothtalker72

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thanks, that was my original plan. i've decided that i should sit her down and straighten things out when we do eventually see eachother. i plan to say something like this "im really interested in you but im not interested in playing games. if you really do want to try to work something out let me know now before i spend time trying to develop something that just isnt there." any thoughts on this?
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Jokerlsk

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Ugggh. That turns them off man. Your overanalyzing it. I would just flirt with other girls and keep your options open. It's not worth it if she doesn't care about you
 

smoothtalker72

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i've been doing that, but i get the feeling that shes only reluctant go out with me because of the rumors that some jealous dude at work has been spreading. and its pretty hard when you've got a hectic schedule along with parents who are semi strict. maybe i am just excusing everything.

i've been tempted to call her, i havent tho. i guess you could say i cant get her off my mind. don't get me wrong, im not obsessing over her. its just that when talking to other girls im not as interested as i was before. im just not inclined to try to chat it up with them like i normally would be.
 
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smoothtalker72

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im not going to see her until next weekend. i feel like i should just suck it up and call her. any thoughts?
 

smoothtalker72

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havent seen her or talked to her in about two weeks. think i should call her to at least show her that im still interested or just call it quits?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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