"Don't be mad at me"

[bigneil]

Did you ever hear those words after a hot date that fell just short of going all the way?

 

[ArcBound]

...

 

[Desdinova]

If you're hearing that, then you've given her the power over you in the bedroom. She now knows she can control you with sex. When you become sexual with a woman, you need to make her be the one who's begging to get laid instead of being the one who places a high priority on the activity.

I know this is a difficult area for most men, but you should NEVER let your emotions show in the bedroom (unless they're positive ones). You cannot get mad when she denies you sex - you should be indifferent to it. You cannot get upset when your c0ck won't stay up - you should just carry on by giving her oral. Showing that you cannot get upset in the bedroom displays the ultimate in confidence and makes you incredibly attractive and sexy to her. Not only that, you're doing the exact opposite of what every AFC does - placing a high priority on sex.

 

[zekko]

When you become sexual with a woman, you need to make her be the one who's begging to get laid instead of being the one who places a high priority on the activity.

Unfortunately, a lot of this type of attitude is promoted on this website. "Men have 10x the testosterone as women, therefore women can't really want sex as bad as a man. Women will trade sex for emotion or support".

This really isn't my experience. Maybe their fire doesn't burn quite as hot, and maybe they have their anti slut defenses to worry about, but I've found that in most cases, women want it just as much as the guy does.

 

[bigneil]

In the case last night it was a matter of my not striking when the iron was hot. She was ready to go early in the date but I made her wait and I followed through with the plans for the night (don't do this) and an hour later the moment was lost. I didn't really care that sex didn't happen (we had sex before many times) but she was apologetic, wanted to make definite plans right then (I did not) and texted "Don't be mad at me" the moment she left (I was heading out for a drink).

It reminded me of my first love who promised sex once and then chickened out (she was then 16). After she left she called and said those exact words. We went on to date for 14 years.

It seems to mean high interest despite sex not happening.

 

[TillTheEndOfTime]

Not only that, you're doing the exact opposite of what every AFC does - placing a high priority on sex.

By this definition, virtually everyone on here is an AFC!

 

[Desdinova]

By this definition, virtually everyone on here is an AFC!

I think the bedroom may be the defining moment of what makes you "the great catch". I've got women waiting in the bushes for me to drop my gf so they can have another romp in the sack with me, and possibly even keep me around. It's fvcking crazy.

Maybe their fire doesn't burn quite as hot, and maybe they have their anti slut defenses to worry about, but I've found that in most cases, women want it just as much as the guy does.

I think women ultimately want confident sex. If you can provide that, she won't go anywhere.

 

[georgie24]

maybe she saw your magic wand and didnt want it inside her?

 

[bigneil]

maybe she saw your magic wand and didnt want it inside her?

We had sex many times before so I don't think that was it.

I had planned to give her a bubble bath after a home cooked dinner but she was ready to go the minute we walked in the bathroom (and even before). But the water was too hot for her and we had to add cold water and she literally wanted it to be room temperature, and somehow by the time she got out of the tub the moment was lost. Still not a bad date.

Louis and Copeland wrote about that. With women, there is only one peak moment of the night when she fires on all cylinders, and you need to remember that sex is the goal, not executing a plan that was designed to maximize the odds of sex.

Also remember that sex means little to women in most cases. You want them to be 100% into it. It's better if they are intimate but don't go all the way than to have non-intimate sex, IMO.

 

[bukowski_merit]

I wouldn't worry about it.

I also wouldn't respond to it.

It's a double bind

"I'm not mad at you" looks weak.

"I'm mad at you" looks weak too. (although, "fvck you, don't ever fvcking not fvck me again!" could work depending on what kind of woman she is; aka: low self esteem).

No response COULD give the look that you're giving her the cold shoulder; but this is exactly why a woman you're seeing should NEVER always get answers to everything she sends you. I regularly don't respond to texts from women. And women get used to it. So if they say "Don't be mad at me" about something - there's a 100% chance they won't get a text in response.

Why she said it - shouldn't matter.

----

Also:

"don't be mad at me" is a pretty weak emotional response from her to you, and a perceived belief by her that you have some form of emotional response to you guys not having sex.

The best way to increase her investment - is to leave her hanging.

Maybe for days.

 

[bigneil]

I normally don't reply either, but being drunk I replied after bars closed (2 hours later) and said it was funny she wrote that because I was just thinking she reminded me of another girl who said that (a 16 year old).

Funny how after a great date we still nitpick why it wasn't perfect. That's another reason it's key to go MIA after a date, as people tend to remember only the good things.