Doing the right thing?

[Spectre]

Alright, I wanted to make sure if i'm doing the smart thing right now. Okay, so there's this girl I was interested in and we made out one night when I was at my friends house. So the next weekend, at a party that I was at, she ends up ****ing another guy. So the next morning (still at the same house) I was talking to everyone but her, making everyone laugh, and I could sense something coming from her like regret for what she did. So the next day it was my birthday, she texted me saying "Happy birthday, Spectre " I didn't reply. The next day(today) she texted me and said "Hey ", I didn't reply.... I'm going about this like we had a relationship and she broke up with me, and I wanted to make sure I'm going about it the appropriate way. Because, I do want to get with her. So any comments or advice on this matter would be great, Thanks!

 

[perseverance]

It's simple, you like the girl and your ego has taken a dent, you'll deny it, but if you didn't why would you have reacted negatively to a girl who had sex with another man? As you say you're not in a relationship with her or seeing her, so she is free to do as she wants.

If you want to bang her then I say reply to her texts and escalate, but then I'd throw her as far as you can, she's not girlfriend material.

 

[vatoloco]

Is this the same girl who asked you via text if you like her?

 

[Spectre]

no it is not, vatoloco. This is a different girl, but I've heard this girl did like me. So, Idk if that changes anything.

 

[perseverance]

no it is not, vatoloco. This is a different girl, but I've heard this girl did like me. So, Idk if that changes anything.

She likes you until she tells you otherwise.

If you are interested, go for her, just doesn't surprised if she is having one night stands when you're dating/ in a relationship.

 

[Spectre]

Okay, I am not btching her out because I don't want to look like I am trying too hard... I am not talking to her because if I did and acted like nothing happened I would look like an AFC....
So, right now I think I'm doing the right thing by not replying to her texts to build her want for me. Until someone gives me some better advice, I will continue my method..

 

[perseverance]

Okay, I am not btching her out because I don't want to look like I am trying too hard... I am not talking to her because if I did and acted like nothing happened I would look like an AFC....
So, right now I think I'm doing the right thing by not replying to her texts to build her want for me. Until someone gives me some better advice, I will continue my method..

I'd say you look AFC by ignoring her, but each to their own. I hope your method works.

 

[Igetit!]

So you are interested in this girl. Well if so,then why are you avoiding her? If you two had a date set up and she had flaked on you or something,then what you're doing may have some validity to it,but really,this doesn't make any sense.


You claim you want to be close to the girl,but every time she reaches out to you,you move farther and farther away. I'm just curious as to how that's supposed to win her over.



I think if you peppered her with this technique,meaning to talk to her some,then ignore her some as well,you'd probably be better off.

Alright, I wanted to make sure if i'm doing the smart thing right now. Okay, so there's this girl I was interested in and we made out one night when I was at my friends house.

NOT ENOUGH INFO HERE. For one,did you meet this girl at the party where you two made out,or had you known her before then?

What happened AFTER you two made out? Were there plans to see each other another day,or did you two just kiss,then go your seperate ways without any discussion of anything happening in the future?

So the next weekend, at a party that I was at, she ends up ****ing another guy.

She had sex with a guy at a party that YOU attended? Wow,this girl gets around,lol.

DOES SHE KNOW that you know this? And what is it EXACTLY you want form this girl? It can't be a long term relationship,......right?




You can't want anything serious with her,do you? I mean she fooled around with you one weekend,then another guy then next one. And I don't think this is anything new for her. Don't think you're guy #1,and the guy she had sex with is #2. Seems to me that each party = a new guy,and I HIGHLY DOUBT that the party where you made out with her at,and the one where she had sex are the only 2 parties she's ever been to.

So the next morning (still at the same house) I was talking to everyone but her, making everyone laugh, and I could sense something coming from her like regret for what she did. So the next day it was my birthday, she texted me saying "Happy birthday, Spectre " I didn't reply. The next day(today) she texted me and said "Hey ", I didn't reply.... I'm going about this like we had a relationship and she broke up with me,

BINGO...


See the part I put in bold? THAT'S where you're making a mistake at.


You said it perfectly. You said,"I'm going about this like we had a relationship and she broke up with me.",and that's WRONG dude. Come on man,you made out with a chick ONE TIME,and now all of the sudden you start acting like it was a relationship? And because she slept with this other guy,you feel betrayed,right?



You're punishing this girl for NOTHING. What did she do wrong? Can you say EXACTLY what wrong she did that warrents you giving her the cold shoulder?



What you're doing is a TURN OFF for women. If you're ignoring her,then she knows there must be a reason why. And if she thinks or finds out that it's because she slept with this other guy,then she'll know that you were hurt/emotionally attached.




And then the attraction will be out the window. She may still call or text you but not out of sexual interest,it'll be out of concern for your FEELINGS.
She'll call or text to see "if you're ok".



Dude,you DO NOT want a girl who you're sexually interest in to start worrying about if she's hurt you or not,ESPECIALLY in the beginning of a possible relationship.

and I wanted to make sure I'm going about it the appropriate way

Well you're not.


If she finds out that you're ignoring her because she slept with this other guy,your goose is cooked my friend because that'll mean you care.


And how can you "care" or be so emotionally involved in some chick you've only made out ONE TIME with? You've never even had a SINGLE DATE with her,and yet your heart is broken?



Get it together man,get it together.

 

[Spectre]

Damn, I'm an idiot. Thank you, Igetit for knocking me back to my senses!

 

[Iceberg]

Okay, I am not btching her out because I don't want to look like I am trying too hard... I am not talking to her because if I did and acted like nothing happened I would look like an AFC....
So, right now I think I'm doing the right thing by not replying to her texts to build her want for me. Until someone gives me some better advice, I will continue my method..

Wrong.

She's NOT your girlfriend, and you're mad at her for hooking up with another guy. THAT is AFC.

She goes to parties and she sleeps around. You're the only guy who's taking her seriously enough to give her the cold shoulder. Everyone else is just banging her and passing her off to their friends. So you can either jump on board and f*** this girl, or forget her entirely. Don't try to play around with her like she's a potential g/f, because she isn't.

 

[Spectre]

I know, i was trippin, dude.... lol...