Doing NC. Help me out brothers, my ego is taking a serious hit

[Shivastorm_88]

So. I broke up with my ex early April. We initially decided to try to stay friends. Early May, I realized that it was stupid. I went NC.

Two weeks later I saw her at the gym where I climb. I was very cold and not engaging towards her, and she texted me two days later asking if I was alright. A text which I ignored.

Ever since that text, a month later, she hasn't initiated contact. She had told me when coming back from her trip she would write to me, which she hasn't.

Now, I don't really care about her per say. I wouldn't say I'm fully over her (it was my first real serious relationship) but I'm doing amazing. Ever since I went NC, I've reconnected with who I am, my social circle has exploded, I'm much more social, I do much more interesting stuff (or I started doing it again), and most importantly, in the last two weeks I slept with three different women. So things are going good for me.

Yet, I can't help but feel a ping at my ego that she has ruled me out of her life so easily (more easily than I have, apparently).

You guys need to talk some sense into me

 

[MtnMan]

I think its normal for your ego to want to have the final "win". Or at least its normal for me. It annoys me to no end that I let things like that get to me. I think its ok as long as you realize the problem, and do not act on it. I think with time and experience with more women, this will get better.

Hang in there and don't do anything stupid like try and initiate contact and cut it off again just so you can have the last laugh. Its immature, won't work, and will leave you feeling worse than before.

If you want to win the game, improve yourself, go meet new women and have fun. That's how you win. Easier said than done, I know.

 

[JoeMarron]

Well it's pretty clear that you're ignoring her. Some people are intelligent enough to take the hint and stop trying to talk to you. It feels good to have a chick blowing up your phone but that's just feeding your ego. Let it go, dont dwell on it. Instead, let your awesome life make you feel awesome.

 

[Kailex]

You broke up with her. That's your final "win". That should keep your ego intact.

Why has she gotten over you so easily? Because she found someone else who has temporarily decided to put up with her crap.

Just remember the reasons why you broke up with her in the first place and forget the rest. What she does now is no concern of yours. For all you know, she could be crying into her pillow every night but she just isn't showing it to you.

 

[6stringer]

Not enough info here about the breakup to tell why its bothering you. Why did you become friends? and did you really want to? and once you decided that it was stupid, the fact is it seems like you secretly wanted more and even though you had the final say, your hand was forced into it.

Again, that's my guess, but without knowing the details, its hard to say. Not that it matters, everyone has given good advice.. let your life and enjoyment be the final say.

 

[Shivastorm_88]

Not enough info here about the breakup to tell why its bothering you. Why did you become friends? and did you really want to? and once you decided that it was stupid, the fact is it seems like you secretly wanted more and even though you had the final say, your hand was forced into it.

I decided to become friends because I was hoping to mend things. And then I realized it wouldn't happen and it was only hurting me, so I cut contact cold turkey. At first, again hoping she would crawl back. Now, I don't even think I would consider getting back with her. This might be my final phase to fully get over her. Know that I did better than her in the breakup, know that she realized she made a mistake and can't find anyone better than me. Purely ego talking here, I am aware

Again, that's my guess, but without knowing the details, its hard to say. Not that it matters, everyone has given good advice.. let your life and enjoyment be the final say.

In bold. You are right, it should be. And it is. Sometimes I get that little after-thought though, which is annoying. At least I'm going for three weeks to Turkey, so that will help things out.