Does this trick work for you?

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Summary
I’ve discovered a technique that boosts my confidence in social situations and makes it easier to approach people. I’m curious if it works for others, too. By sharing it here, I hope some of you might test the technique and provide feedback. Below, I’ll share some background, describe the effects it has on me, and explain how to do it.

Some Background
First, let me clarify: I’m not a pickup artist, nor am I interested in pickup artistry. I’m married and have no interest in approaching other women for romantic purposes. However, I recently discovered a trick that dramatically boosts my confidence in social situations and makes it much easier to approach people. I’ve found it especially helpful in non-romantic contexts, where it’s proven very effective.

What I’m curious about is whether this trick works only for me—perhaps for some personal reason—or if it works for others too. If this technique turns out to be generally effective, it could be a useful tool for building social confidence. I understand that many of you are interested in improving your social skills and often practice cold approaches. My goal is to gather some initial evidence about whether this trick works for others, not just me.

What Are the Effects of the Trick?
I’d describe myself as having average social skills and confidence. I know people who are more naturally adept in social settings and others who are much more awkward or uncomfortable. Like many, I find social situations at least somewhat intimidating. Approaching strangers, speaking in groups, or giving presentations usually causes some unease or anxiety. While I handle these situations, I often feel reluctant to enter them—though it’s not extreme or pathological.

As a single, I struggled to cold-approach women I didn’t know. Asking someone out, especially in person, was daunting. Again, this seems pretty typical—few people find these situations easy. However, when I use the trick, everything changes. It’s like flipping a switch that puts me into some kind of 'social mode'. I feel a surge of social confidence, and rather than dreading social interactions, I am positively drawn to them. Approaching people becomes effortless and instinctive, rather than something I have to push myself to do. In a difficult-to-describe way, talking to people, including strangers, suddenly appears like the natural thing to do.

Importantly, this confidence isn’t excessive or inappropriate. I don’t become overconfident or start engaging in intrusive behavior. Instead, I gain just the right amount of self-assurance, leading to a natural ease and outgoingness in social situations.

Because I’m married, I haven’t tested this trick in romantic contexts, but I can easily imagine how it might make approaching women far less intimidating.

How to Do the Trick
Hopefully, I’ve piqued your interest. Here’s how the trick works—or at least how it works for me:

The trick is simple: focus your attention on the lower part of your body—especially your feet and legs. That’s it.

The trick works by shifting your mental focus to different parts of your body. I know it sounds esoteric, but it’s surprisingly straightforward once you try it. If you’re unfamiliar with the concept of 'mental focus', here’s a quick explanation: you can generally direct your awareness to different parts of your body. For example, right now, you could focus on your right hand or your left elbow. If this is still unclear to you, you might want to read about autogenic training, where this technique is commonly used.

Now, the trick involves redirecting this focus specifically to your feet and legs. In my experience, our mental focus tends to default to the upper parts of the body (chest, head, etc.). When I consciously shift my focus downward, I feel an immediate boost in social confidence.

The effect is almost instantaneous. The moment I shift my focus, I enter 'social mode'. However, as soon as my focus drifts back to my upper body, the newly gained confidence disappears. Unfortunately, my default state is to focus on the upper body, so I need to consciously bring it back to my legs and feet. This means the effect isn’t permanent—at least, I haven’t managed to make 'social mode' my default yet.

That said, maintaining the effect requires minimal mental effort, and it’s easy to sustain for an extended period when you need extra confidence. I haven’t noticed any diminishing returns or 'confidence depletion'. As far as I can tell, you can use the trick as often as you’d like without losing its potency.

My Question for You
I realize this might sound unbelievable. If I hadn’t observed these effects in myself with great consistency, I’d be skeptical too. In fact, I’m still amazed and puzzled by it.

This is where you come in. I’d love to know if the trick works for others. Since many of you are focused on improving social confidence and seeking out challenging social interactions, I hope you’ll give it a try. It’s simple, quick, and requires no preparation. Whether you test it in romantic or non-romantic situations, I’d be grateful if you could share your experiences—positive or negative.

If it does work for you, I'd ask you to use it responsibly. Please don’t use it to engage in behavior that could be considered inappropriate or disrespectful.

Sidenote
I’ve also noticed effects on my posture, breathing, and overall body awareness, though I won’t go into those here. My best guess is that this technique affects the nervous system, perhaps altering the balance between the sympathetic and parasympathetic systems.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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This can be considered a form of meditation. Being present and having equanimity of mind is guaranteed to improve your success at talking to women, but only if you do it for its own sake rather than for the sake of improving your success with women. The moment you do any sort of meditation with any kind of ulterior motive, it is not serving you, and never will.
 

Bingo-Player

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OP - not sure about seduction or social engineering but you could have a solid future in copywriting

Anyway I mean look whatever works , Surface level confidence with women is not that difficult too achieve

Back when I was an emptied headed 20 something I would be charging around clubs like a bull in a china shop approaching any female that would give me the time of day

I learnt if you approach anyone with enough authority they will generally fit into your frame

Biggest problem is falling into the mental trap of " shall I do it " once you're in that spot its very very difficult to be objective

Whoever coined "just do it" for Nike definitely had a lot of experience with women
 

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Ricky

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This is interesting. I don’t have confidence or social anxiety issues but this could be helpful for those who do
 
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