"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Does this guy fancy me(like me) or is he just using me for sex??

d!ckmojo

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sassygirlie89 said:
I am starting to lose a SLIGHT interest in him because his lack of contact is driving him nuts. So if he is playing hard to get he is playing a very dangerous game with me. So heres to meeting a guy who doesn't send me mixed signals through lack of contact if this guy doesn't change his game :)
You don't realise it, but this is a fcking lie. You're lying to yourself, albeit unintentionally. But if you did meet a guy who didn't send you mixed signals, or should I say WHEN you meet a guy who doesn't send you mixed signals, he won't interest you very much.

Look, its a quirk of psychology, but something is only desirable if its just out of reach. Imagine you have a string, and you dangle it in front of a kitten, and jiggle it around just outside of its reach. The cat goes mental! It wants that string, it will chase that string around for nuts. But if you drop that string and let the cat have it, the cat will lose interest and go back to licking itself or whatever.

Its the same with you and guys: if a guy straight up was unambigously interested in you... meh. You without a shadow of a doubt wouldn't feel the same spark of excitement and attraction for him.

You need to accept that the reason you want this guy is precisely BECAUSE he doesn't initiate contact and ignores you for long periods and is playing hard to get. I know you don't want to accept it, but its the truth.

To another girl, this guy isn't even probably all that hot, but just because of the way he's treated you, your Interest Level in him sky-rocketed.

To the other guys on here, I don't think its appropriate to tell chicks to spin plates. Spinning plates is a male prerogative fellas, don't encourage her to be a skank.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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sassygirlie89

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I am actually starting to lose a slight interest in him because believe it or not I like guys who show a lot of interest in me and initiate the contact most of the time. It makes me feel special I guess. I really don't get this thing where if you show a lot of interest in someone they become bored of you easily. I don't think this is true if you actually like the person.
 

Atom Smasher

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sassygirlie89 said:
I am actually starting to lose a slight interest in him because believe it or not I like guys who show a lot of interest in me and initiate the contact most of the time. It makes me feel special I guess. I really don't get this thing where if you show a lot of interest in someone they become bored of you easily. I don't think this is true if you actually like the person.
Of course this is how you feel. Nature dictates that man is the pursuer and that woman is the prey. She "lets" herself get caught when she is interested.

It is human nature to become bored of and to lose respect for that which is too easily obtainable. This is true of both genders. That's why a one night stand usually ends badly for the woman. All has been said and all has been done.
 

sassygirlie89

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Well I don't just rely on looks, a guy has to have a decent personality as well. The annoying thing is that the 2 times I was with this guy we did get on very well together. But maybe that was because he was getting sex at the end of the night I don't know.

Well I didn't go out this weekend because I am trying to save money lol. But I am going out this thursday night with my work buddies and we're going to a hot spot later that night so maybe I might meet someone there. I don't mind if I don't but maybe if I met a really nice guy there it would defo take my mind off this guy who I now see might actually be a complete and utter ******* :)
 

sassygirlie89

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Well I am definitely not going to message him first from now on.

But what if he decides to message me during the week and asks if I want to meet up for another night out with his friends and my friends which he did suggest but after his recent lack of contact maybe he was just saying that.

I know for a fact that I will be happy if he messages me first during the week only because I am a little bit gullible that way. I wish I could say to him you are a complete and utter a**hole for not contacting me in over a week so why should I meet up for another night out with you. But I am just too nice a person to do that.

But this might not happen at all and maybe it would be a good thing if it never happened. So I could meet a nice guy and not have sex with him on the first few dates and then I would know if he was interested in me or just the sex :)
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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perseverance

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You could just ask him to get clarification on where things may or may not be heading.
 

Greasy Pig

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Just do what every girl does, OP.
Enjoy a sexual "no strings" relationship with him for 6 weeks, have "the talk" (ie where is this relationship going?), watch him freak out and leave, then repeat the process until you find one who doesn't leave.

And your pic didn't work again....
 

sassygirlie89

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Greasy Pig said:
Just do what every girl does, OP.
Enjoy a sexual "no strings" relationship with him for 6 weeks, have "the talk" (ie where is this relationship going?),
That is if he contacts me again because I sure am not! I am surprised that I even initiated conversations with him because I usually hate to initiate conversations with the guys that I am attracted to.

I dunno maybe me saying to him to drop me off at the end of the road so that my parents don't see me with him might have scared him off lol. Well to rephrase that, I told him that my parents don't know that I stayed with you last night because they don't believe in having sex straight away even though they know I am texting you.

Ah who cares lol that might not be the reason at all but it just crossed my mind anyway.

Oh is the pic not working again??!! Oh well that is the last pic I am sending anyway. I do not know why they are not working :)
 

flashpoint

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sassygirlie89 said:
I do not know why they are not working :)
such a ****tease lol. first one is not working because it has restricted access and second one points to your own computer which of course is not open to anyone else but you. either you are some damsel in computer distress (makes me wonder how you even manage to post here?) or you'r playing with wannabe DJs the good old game ...
 

MikeOck

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sassygirlie89 said:
Oh is the pic not working again??!! Oh well that is the last pic I am sending anyway. I do not know why they are not working :)
Just go to the facebook pic and change the privacy settings on it to 'public'.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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omega05

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i dont understand how a girl can come on a forum full of guys and ask for guy help. Answers are gonna be biased to what a guy would/should do in the situation
 

Aristippus

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Let Sassy describe in great detail what the man she's interested in actually did, how he behaved, and then just do the same thing. Learn from it guys! hahaha Then you'll have some woman posting here about this "guy she really likes.". :p
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Aristippus

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YOU are going to suffer the sweet misery and anticipation that comes with meeting a man you're sexually interested in and YOU are going to like it! That's what Nature says and no amount of talking to us about it is going to change it. Nature can be a b**ch sometimes, can't it?
 

flashpoint

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sassygirlie89 said:
Ammmm I don't mind like lol well if its bad feedback prob not lol :)
you dont mind or do you only want to hear what you want to hear?
 

sassygirlie89

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I said I don't mind so that means fire away.

But going by your "do you only want to hear what you want to hear", it doesn't sound like good feedback but anyway I don't mind every guy has their own opinion :)
 
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perseverance

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You seem like a decent looking girl, but the whole drink in one hand, cigarette in another hand look just turns me off. I bet it turns off a lot of other men as well.
 

sassygirlie89

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perseverance said:
You seem like a decent looking girl, but the whole drink in one hand, cigarette in another hand look just turns me off. I bet it turns off a lot of other men as well.
You must think I must be some sort of alcoholic or something lol.

It was a night out and I was not holding a cigarette in my hand, I was on a bus.

But I do smoke but so does most other people lol :)
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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