Does this chick want me to ask her out

[jizzlobber]

This chick friend was going to Vegas so I told put $200 on a football game for me. It turns out she didnt go which is good because I would have lost the bet. She gives me the money and says, "Maybe you should treat me to dinner since I saved you $200." And I say sarcastically "Yeah, right." So the next day she comes around again and says,"I saved you $200 and you dont even treat me to dinner." So I say, "Okay, if you are nice to me"
She then says, "No" and walks away but I cant tell if shes joking or not. So what's up with this chick?

 

[blue17]

my guess: She was giving you an obvious signal to take her out to dinner because she was interested. You rejected her proposal (whether sarcastic or not) and she was offended. Now she is guarding her feelings towards you and any attempt you make to fix the situation she will have an attitude of like 'too late! you missed your chance!" kinda thing. Not looking good.....you missed your big window of opportunity and from here on in it's an uphill battle. She has the upper hand at this point.

 

[spidersense]

with the sarcastic response you gave, "yeah, right" she was probably thinking that you were saying yeah right to going out with her, not yeah right to treating her to dinner(which is how I would have meant it if I were in your shoes) and then she felt rejected, which women feel all the time. once they feel rejected by a man, something switches in them (there was a great thread about this topic in the forum) and they are pretty hard to get then. IF you are REALLY interested in this girl, then explain to her how you really meant it(if you meant it the way I said it), that may clear things up in her head, and ask her to meet you for a cup of coffee, and say you MAY actually TREAT her to that, if she's nice to you.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

True what was said about her feeling rejected. What you need to do is not explain yourself. You don't need to seek her approval, or to try to explain you using some humor, etc. She needs to get over it; at least if she's that interested.

Just tell her, "hey, so when are you treating me to dinner?", if she's interested still, she'll say "no, when are you taking me out?", and take it from there.

 

[spidersense]

that may work, and if it does, it would be a better way of going about it. but my point is that sometimes when that switch switches, it switches really hard, and saying something like that may not help. That's why I said "IF you are REALLY interested in this girl" emphasizing the word "REALLY" then, it wouldn't be very "Don Juan" but, explaining to her how you meant it could loosen her up to you again. This isn't something I personally would do, but if you know this girl and you think there could be a good relationship there, then try that if that's you.

go with gangster's advice first though.

 

[Grey Fox]

Right now trying to pull any games or tricks is just going to deepen the hole you have already dug for yourself. Instead just call her up, don't explain, don't apologize. Just ask her to dinner if you are interested in her, no biggie.

-Grey Fox

 

[Wyldfire]

She did like you before you hurt her feelings by (in her mind) rejecting her rather harshly. She doesn't like you anymore and it's unlikely she will ever agree or want to go out with you again. If a woman suggests going out you can't say things like that to her or she will lost all interest very fast.

 

[jizzlobber]

re:

I guess my question is if she felt so rejected why would she come by the next day and bring it up again. And is there any chance she is still interested?

We have been freinds for about a year. Before she went to Vegas she was telling me how she was going to talk to all these cute guys. I told she can do anything she wants as long as she puts my bet down.

 

[Wyldfire]

Re: re:

Originally posted by jizzlobber
I guess my question is if she felt so rejected why would she come by the next day and bring it up again. And is there any chance she is still interested?

We have been freinds for about a year. Before she went to Vegas she was telling me how she was going to talk to all these cute guys. I told she can do anything she wants as long as she puts my bet down.

She only brought it up again to make you feel bad so you'd ask her to dinner so she could reject you. She just needed to be able to tell herself that even though you rejected her first, you really did like her but she rejected you. It's just a female defense mechanism to protect her own ego. She doesn't want to go out with you now. She did before, but you missed the boat this time.

Don't ever reject an offer from a woman you like...if you do there most likely won't be another chance.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Re: Re: re:

Originally posted by Wyldfire
She only brought it up again to make you feel bad so you'd ask her to dinner so she could reject you. She just needed to be able to tell herself that even though you rejected her first, you really did like her but she rejected you. It's just a female defense mechanism to protect her own ego. She doesn't want to go out with you now. She did before, but you missed the boat this time.

I totally agree with this female point of view. A lot of times guys are rejecting women and don't even realize it. While this is happening, she is asking herself "why won't he put the moves on me?", "doesn't he like me?", "I am making it so obvious, and he doesn't want me." All this goes on in her head while the guy has no idea that she feels rejected. If her signs/hints don't get through, she has felt rejected, because that is how they communicate interest. It doesn't matter that her way is not the same way a guy would communicate. Most of the "rejection" dialogue is in her own head.

As we all know, women don't function like guys, who would only feel rejected if they actually asked her out and she turned him down. Shoot, I missed it totally until Wyldfire brought it up; so I'm sure I miss all kinds of signs women are always sending. Women feel rejected all the time. When they throw hints at a guy that totally gets what is going on, they feel like he is a worthwhile guy that she needs to get to know.

 

[Fenderules]

lol this is like that other guy that completely Gandji'd that other girl that had high interest and got weirded it out.

lol from your actions your name should be Jizzgobeler, caust from your actions thats all your gonna get on your mouth

 

[jizzlobber]

re

So is there anything I can do to make it up to her? Would a perceived rejection cause a woman to loose interest just like that especially if she liked a guy for a long time? I am interested in her and I thought I was playing it cool. When she said No it was a weak no and she is usually pretty emphatic so I wasnt sure if she wanted me to go after her. Thats why I wasnt sure if she was joking or not.

 

[Wyldfire]

Re: re

Originally posted by jizzlobber
So is there anything I can do to make it up to her? Would a perceived rejection cause a woman to loose interest just like that especially if she liked a guy for a long time? I am interested in her and I thought I was playing it cool. When she said No it was a weak no and she is usually pretty emphatic so I wasnt sure if she wanted me to go after her. Thats why I wasnt sure if she was joking or not.

There's probably nothing you can do at this point. Once a woman feels rejected by you it's usually game over. You go from being that cool, cute guy who's really nice and funny to the idiot who thinks he's too good to go out with her even though she went out of her way to do a favor for him.

You have to be really careful with the c*ckiness with girls that already like you, because if you say the wrong thing it's "game over" and you won't even know what hit you.

A basic rule to live by is if a girl you are interested in hints about going out do NOT choose that time to be all "C&F" with her...she'll feel rejected and lose interest.

 

[skinnydart]

When she walked away and said "no", wasn't this just being sarcastic/joking, sense that is what you were doing all along?

I would say ask her out, she was obviously hinting at it. You saying "yeah right" or "if you're nice" shouldn't be enough for her to think that much less of you.

She might have just been a little embarressed that she actually asked you to ask her out after you said no.

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by skinnydart
When she walked away and said "no", wasn't this just being sarcastic/joking, sense that is what you were doing all along?

I would say ask her out, she was obviously hinting at it. You saying "yeah right" or "if you're nice" shouldn't be enough for her to think that much less of you.

She might have just been a little embarressed that she actually asked you to ask her out after you said no.

Oh, but if he asks her out and she accepts she's giving him an opportunity to reject her a second time. She was the last one to "reject" him by saying no after she tricked him into mentioning going out again. It's likely she'd chew off her own leg before giving him a chance to reject her again. She's gonna want to save face.

 

[squirrels]

Originally posted by jizzlobber
This chick friend was going to Vegas so I told put $200 on a football game for me. It turns out she didnt go which is good because I would have lost the bet. She gives me the money and says, "Maybe you should treat me to dinner since I saved you $200." And I say sarcastically "Yeah, right." So the next day she comes around again and says,"I saved you $200 and you dont even treat me to dinner." So I say, "Okay, if you are nice to me"
She then says, "No" and walks away but I cant tell if shes joking or not. So what's up with this chick?

If it were me, I would've said, "Damn, girl...I better be getting laid if I'm treating a woman to a $200 dinner!" Then would've been like, "No, seriously, you wanna go out and grab a burger somewhere? Maybe shoot some pool? How bout Wednesday?"

But that's just me.

I ain't buying no girl no $200 dinner, that's for sure. LOL

 

[biker_gixxer]

"Maybe you should treat me to dinner since I saved you $200."

My response. 'You know, you're right, I should treat you to dinner. How's does Taco Bell sound?'

She'll probably give you an attitude at his point, hopefully playful. I would then reply with...

'O.k., o.k, Burger King it is, but don't push it'.

 

[skinnydart]

My response. 'You know, you're right, I should treat you to dinner. How's does Taco Bell sound?'

She'll probably give you an attitude at his point, hopefully playful. I would then reply with...

'O.k., o.k, Burger King it is, but don't push it'.

That's awesome! Yeah, that's definently what you should have said.

 

[jizzlobber]

You guys were right

I guess the switch went down afterall. I sent her an email saying I would buy her dinner and she replied saying "Nah thats okay. I was only joking about dinner and I hope you didnt get the wrong idea." Its funny because before this happened we were sharing an umbrella and she was pushing her body very closely to mine. And the person who said she brought it p again the next day just so she could say no was right I think. I guess I will chalk this one down as lesson learned. Do you think ganji might work? We work in the same building.

 

[Grey Fox]

Let her settle down first, she is still probably pissed with you. Let time soften her up for you. If she was truely interested in you once, she'll be interested again so long as you drop the ****y act and go with what you were doing before you mouthed off.

-Grey Fox