Will900 said:
hi
i met a girl about 2 weeks before xmas at a club where i live, we were dancing and kissing all night.
OK,you said that the two of you were dancing and kissing all night. Was this on the
same night you met each other?
Will900 said:
Then we exchanged numbers, we started txting then decided to start going out. Few days later she said we rushed into this relationship and we should go back to just mates and get to know each other more so thats what we did.
Question:From the time you two were "dancing and kissing all night" up until she said that the two of you should go back to being just mates,how much time had passed? Days? A few weeks? If possible,give an exact amount of time.
Will900 said:
We met up again things went rly well but then the next day she told me she wasn't ready for a relationship and she wanted to be single which took me by surprise because we were getting on so well.
I don't know
everything about women,but I've learned enough to know that her telling you that she wasn't ready for a relationship was a lie. That,I
do know. If she
really wasn't ready or interested in having a relationship,then why would she even bother with exchanging numbers and trading text with you? If all she wanted was sex,then she'd have slept with you on the same night you two were "kissing and dancing " all night,and that'd be the end of it. The fact that you two exchanged contact info means that she originally had planned on having contact with you beyond the night you met each other.
Will900 said:
Now to this day we are still mates and we do talk quite abit over txt or msn etc. But if i ask her anything about us she says don't start this again or just saying please as if don't go there.
In other words,what you're saying is that if you mention anything "sexual" pertaining to the two of you,then she says not to go there,or not to start that again. Well guess what that means? It means that (at least in her opinion) you said or did something that killed the attraction for her. And more than likely,it was something in your behavior. So what did you do? Did you push for a relationship with her/act more interested in her than she was in you? You'll need to examine yourself to find out where the error occured. You need to do this because there's a good chance that whatever it was that you did,said,or how you behaved,you're
unintentionally still doing it right now,which is why everytime you bring up the two of you dating to her,she says not to go there.
Will900 said:
I still really like her alot and i want us to go back to how we were before xmas.
Well,it
is possible for the two of you to go back to the way things were,but first,
YOU have to go back to the way
YOU were in the beginning. Look at the way you act and behave now vs. the way you were behaving the night you met this girl. Is it the same? I doubt it. There is a difference because this girl
felt it. That's why she backed out of the relationship with you.
Will900 said:
Any suggestions on what i should do?
Thanks
Well first of all,STAY AWAY from this girl while you figuring this thing out. The more you're in her presence while you're giving off the weak/unattractive vibe,the greater your chances of falling into the friendzone. In fact,you might already be there. If that's the case,then forget. It's already over. However,if you're not there yet,then get away from this girl. It won't take you long to find the problem,just ask your self these questions:
Are I being a man/masculine/in control?
Am I leading the interactions with her/her following me instead of me following her?
Do I have the stronger frame?(Meaning do you draw her into your world,or do you fall into hers?)
Be honest with yourself.
Good luck man.
