Does getting dumped have an echo?

[bigneil]

Looking back over the years I'm observing a pattern. Whenever a woman ends the relationship and you walk away, she will contact you a week later, but at that point anything you say will be used against you. So basically as soon as you open your mouth she will dump you again immediately.

By some paradox she will often claim the reason she dumped you to begin with (last week) is because of whatever you just said (today).

She will leave you thinking you somehow messed up a good opportunity (again).

I'm wondering if others have observed this echo effect, why it happens, and whether there really is a way to swing things back in your favor when she returns.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

This is the exact reason you go No Contact.

 

[bigneil]

Yes NC is key, but I'm wondering if they do it just to get one last kick in, or whether the same pattern of failure plays out again. Is it their nesting instinct that makes them return to prior lovers briefly? Or are they looking to blame you to remove guilt?

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

Girls second guess their decision but as soon as they hear the guy talk again they suddenly remember again.

 

[sinnerman]

Looking back over the years I'm observing a pattern. Whenever a woman ends the relationship and you walk away, she will contact you a week later, but at that point anything you say will be used against you. So basically as soon as you open your mouth she will dump you again immediately.

By some paradox she will often claim the reason she dumped you to begin with (last week) is because of whatever you just said (today).

She will leave you thinking you somehow messed up a good opportunity (again).

I'm wondering if others have observed this echo effect, why it happens, and whether there really is a way to swing things back in your favor when she returns.

OH yes.. Ive observed this echo effect. Usually this happens in case of Limited Contact. I think if the woman has wavering mind then this is bound to happen. And yea you'll be left thinking how you messed up an oppurtunity.

Also this happens when you haven't made her anxious enough. the reason behind going NC is to make her realize her decision was fool hardy and you have moved on. This eventually starts to eat her up so she tries to text you or IM you or establish any "low intensity contact". Now most people here (including me) would respond coz usually if you go NC on someone then its accepted that your feelings are involved. Once you reply her sudden need of you is extinguished. She is no longer that anxious. Once that emotion of anxiety is gone she'll again remember how she decided to end things and later starts analyzing the whole affair.

I think you get only one shot at NC(in the case you're trying to make her come back). if you play it right(let the anxiety level rise till she goes crazy) then it will go smoothly. after 2-3 times it just becomes a pattern of breaking up and making up. and the "echo" continues to become louder

 

[PRMoon]

Firstly this is why the ignore feature on your phone is so useful. If you ignore after the first two rings she should get the message. Ignoring txt and emails in tandem should really solidify stance of "f*ck off b*itch"

But to awnser your question, for the sake of humor, you should typically expect something devious from a girl who just broke up with you if they're calling you. Many times its like buyers remorse where they have to justify their decision to themselves and badging on you further is an easy way to do it. The post relationship sex is another indicator that even though she broke up with you, those emotional bonds are giving her fits making it hard to "quit you" What you shouldn't expect is anything logical or rational.

 

[Strelok]

They're not getting validation out of you anymore so they call you back and dump you again in order to have that ego boost.
Is no different than girls deleting you from their friends list on facebook, it doesnt have any logical reason, it's just a quick fix for their ego as much as a choccolate is a quick fix for their desire of pleasure.

As a man you feel powerful when knock out an other man in a fist fight, they do when they have someone chasing them and they throw him away only to have him to come back.
Better yet if they can brag about it with their friends pretending they guy is annoying her.