Does "claiming" girls deter AMOGs when going out?

[Roan]

So I went to a pool/club party a few nights ago and brought two girls with me, one of whom I've banged and kind of have a thing going on with. We meet up with our group there and as the night progresses everyone's getting drunk, having fun. No worries.

My ex (who I'm still sexing) was also chilling with us, so I didn't want to be too overt with any affection and touching towards her or the girl I brought. So I kept the kino and stuff subtle between the two, but at one point had my hands resting on both their asses at the same time while we were in line with the group waiting for drinks. Neither of them knew.

Later on in the night one of the dudes in the group, someone who I've met once, got the number of the girl I brought, right in front of me. Whether he knew she came with me or not I dunno, but I was sitting and talking with my ex at the time it happened so I didn't say anything and kept my cool. It did make me go "Hmmmm" though. Anyway, brought the chick I came with back to my place and proceeded to pound her out the rest of the night.

There's more to the story but my issue is this: Is there a DJ way to "claim" a girl when out in public that would deter other dudes from trying to swoop in or try for the number? From what I understand mate-guarding makes you look beta, but NOT doing some form of mate-guarding has bitten me in the ass before.

Thoughts and advice appreciated.

 

[skinnyguy]

So I went to a pool/club party a few nights ago and brought two girls with me, one of whom I've banged and kind of have a thing going on with. We meet up with our group there and as the night progresses everyone's getting drunk, having fun. No worries.

My ex (who I'm still sexing) was also chilling with us, so I didn't want to be too overt with any affection and touching towards her or the girl I brought. So I kept the kino and stuff subtle between the two, but at one point had my hands resting on both their asses at the same time while we were in line with the group waiting for drinks. Neither of them knew.

Later on in the night one of the dudes in the group, someone who I've met once, got the number of the girl I brought, right in front of me. Whether he knew she came with me or not I dunno, but I was sitting and talking with my ex at the time it happened so I didn't say anything and kept my cool. It did make me go "Hmmmm" though. Anyway, brought the chick I came with back to my place and proceeded to pound her out the rest of the night.

There's more to the story but my issue is this: Is there a DJ way to "claim" a girl when out in public that would deter other dudes from trying to swoop in or try for the number? From what I understand mate-guarding makes you look beta, but NOT doing some form of mate-guarding has bitten me in the ass before.

Thoughts and advice appreciated.

Are you in Vegas?

Cause numbers mean nothing there.

 

[Roan]

Yup.

But...three nights later she texts me that she's out with the dude that got her number and his friend and the other girl I brought to the pool (her roommate).

Her: Are u working tonight?
Me: I'm free for a few hours

Her: I and roommate are in karaoke nearby market with Dave [number guy] and his friend. I want to invite you but almost finish it.lol
Me: No thanks. You two make a nice couple. Goodbye.

Her: We can meet tomorrow?
Her: Roan...:'(

[Next Day] Her: Are you angry with me?

Haven't replied back yet.

 

[G_Govan]

If I understand this correctly, she isn't in a committed relationship with you so why would you assume she wouldn't be messing with other guys? Not only that but YOU are messing with multiple girls at the same time.

You reacted in an angry/jealous manner to her text which shows her how you really feel so the cat's out of the bag at this point (in case you were trying to give her the impression that you just wanted something casual).

She already knows the answer to her question.

My question is, given the circumstances, why would you allow yourself to become this invested?

Unless you're willing to physically fight other men there really isn't any way you can prevent other men from hitting on your girl if you go out to bars/clubs. Some guys will size you up and not care either way, it's expected in that kind of setting.

 

[Roan]

Can't argue with what you're saying Govan.

We aren't exclusive, and yes I wouldn't normally care what she's doing and with who. But the fact that someone got her number in front of me, after everyone's liquored up of course, and then she texts me that she's out with him on what seems like a double date does not sit well with me. Feels disrespectful.

Granted, she's from a foreign country and has been in the US for only about a year, so there could be some communication and cultural misunderstandings. Could also be she only went out on behalf of her roommate, who's interested in the other guy's friend. Or not, doesn't matter I guess.

How would you play this out?

 

[DragonBlood]

Feels disrespectful.

she's from a foreign country [...] so there could be some communication and cultural misunderstandings.

Dont bull**** yourself!! The only misunderstanding here is the quality of women you bring into your life.

The solution I would apply to this is keeping an eye open for a replacement and being equally shameless to raise her attraction. Not from a place of "jealously and control" but because its the correct course of action. If shes not your gf you should have already been doing the same thing. Set firmer boundaries with the next one or with this one if she improves.

I hit on other girls all the time when Im out with my "friends". It only turns them on more and makes the night fun by boosting my mood and confidence. The only way to pimp your hoes is to actually be a pimp. You are acting like a concerned bf and enticing her promiscuous behavior. If you are the most desirable man in the room she wouldnt be spending her time and energy with "Dave". And even if she did, you would have so much going on you probably wouldnt give a ****. She would fade away and a more attracted girl would take her place.

Acting pissy and making couple jokes isnt going to help you compared to having a pair of balls. Be unapologetic and always keep your inspiration to meet new girls, even if its just to socialize.


As a side note about "mate guarding" (since you asked the question) thats pretty straight forward. If you have a hot girlfriend, dont bring her to the club. You will be AMOGd with single guys who are on top of their game and lose the girl. Such as your example above, if you didnt go to the club/party she wouldnt have even met Dave, and Dave would probably never of had the balls to get your girls number.

I go to the bar, and you would be surprised how many lonely girls I meet just sitting around drinking, waiting for their dumbass bf to show up. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. If you are not taking advantage of your enviroment to meet new girls then at the very least dont drop your girls into venues that work against you.

 

[Roan]

Set firmer boundaries with the next one or with this one if she improves.

Examples of boundaries and how to set? I know I've should've done this from the beginning but didn't because I don't want to seem too overbearing right off the bat...something I need to work on. Might not be too late with this one since it's still in the early stages.

 

[DragonBlood]

Examples of boundaries and how to set?

By leading. Say your girl doesnt like dancing. Take her by the hand and bring her to the dance floor! If she refuses still, dance with a girl already on the dance floor and ignore her for 3 hours.


In your example. Right after Dave leaves ask her to delete the number. Kind of weird to hang out with the guy after complying to that would it? If she refuses or tries to open a confrontation about it look annoyed and ignore her (passively) for the rest of the night. Also, go talk to other girls.

1. Lead, have fun and expect compliance.
2. If she fails withdraw all fun and become indifferently cold. Gain compliance from other girls. This will cause her to chase and re-evaluate why she tried to wear the pants.

Things have to go in the direction you want regardless of the girl.


Here is a simple example I had to deal with recently. There is a girl I like to take to lunch to socialize with. One day she shoots me a text saying she will bring her own lunch this time, which messes with my plans but helps her save money. I could be "cool with it" out of fear of losing the girl... or I could do what I actually wanted. I told her the place I wanted to go to wouldnt allow that. She complied and continued to pay for lunch, and the frame is now set I get to take her wherever I want without telling her in advance. As long as you are doing what you want to do, and you are leading, a girl will very rarely work against that.


It sounds with this girl you arent really sure yourself where you want things to go. Is she a **** buddy or a girlfriend? She doesnt really know. So when something like this comes up she goes with the flow. If you complain about it after the fact this makes you look weak. She will resent the fact that you were hiding what you wanted from her.

I and roommate are in karaoke nearby market with Dave [number guy] and his friend. I want to invite you but almost finish it.lol

First off, I want to point out this is a bad situation to even be in. And you should have killed this by not going to the party or removing her from the situation. You cant comply with this and you are now killing this.

I dont know if I would have responded to this at all, but so far you are handling this well. "Are you angry with me?" is pathetic as it shifts the blame onto you!!! I wouldnt text her EVER again and just go about your life like nothing is wrong until she writes a wall of text saying how sorry she is, and how much she misses you. This could take two weeks or even a month. Being ridiculously aloof is not "overbearing" as she has the freedom to chose what happens next. I never get mad at girls or get into fights, but I allow my attraction to go downwards through inaction when they do something stupid. Her actions have to cause your emotional investment to go down instead of up with this drama nonsense. The weight is fully on her to chase and maintain the relationship now. Just cut her off, Im curious how she responds.

Ideally, you want her to get really worried and emotional so she overthinks this. Then when she explodes just reach out like everything was fine in the first place and meet up The fact your "last" text ends on a goodbye with a period will drive her insane.


I had another girl actually who flaked me on a date. I just ignored and forgot about it. When I stumble across her again 2 weeks later shes excited to see me and very apologetic about genuinely forgetting the date. I say its cool and set another one up right there. Do you think she is likely to ever forget again? Even if she did what effect would it really have on me? I already went about replacing her tbh, but in this case she did come back. This is a good way to set boundaries of what you determine is acceptable, by shifting your attraction away from negative stimulus and behaviors.