"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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does being comfortable around chicks still equate success?

sstype

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i see a great fallacy on this website, the mentality that the more you approach and talk to girls, the more comfortable you will get around them, thus being able to close them.

i have done this, and the fact that i work a sales job which requires walking up to complete strangers has tremendously improved my communication skills with people in general.

yet, i still realize something, the girls i feel attracted will 9 times out of ten feel little to no attraction towards me. I am very good at observing body language, and their body language just yells "i am not interested in you" sure they will be nice and friendly, but not too friendly unfortunately.
Its gotten to a point where a girl will subtly or not so subtly "reject" me, and of course it hurts for a day, but afterwards i just forget about it and go about my life.

you guys here are all about "APPROACH AND GET REJECTED!" well i have done that already, now i want to not get rejected for once.
We all know that "practice makes perfect" we know what we do wrong each time and work on correcting that.

Am i doing something wrong with these chicks? because i dont act overall desperate or needy, or are they just not that attracted to me from the getgo?
 
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"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Hound_of_Love

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Yes, you're doing something wrong but without more info, nobody can tell you what it is.
 

flexion_

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Being confortable around them is not really an ability - its pretty much required. Thats a given. This just puts you in the position of having access to all the women you come across.

What you do when you are with them is your problem. We have no idea what that is though...
 

sstype

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Originally posted by flexion_
Being confortable around them is not really an ability - its pretty much required. Thats a given. This just puts you in the position of having access to all the women you come across.

What you do when you are with them is your problem. We have no idea what that is though...
to be honest i dont know either. i wish i could figure that out myself, but you know women they will never tell you truthfully whats on their minds
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Visceral

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IMO ...

Perhaps being comfortable around women really means being comfortable with seducing them - getting rid of your "Nice Guy" hangups about being sexual and masculine with them?

I know I'm perfectly comfortable around women I'm not attracted to, so I don't doubt that comfort alone isn't enough to generate interest.

Unless, of course, you're making poor choices in women or really screwing up somehow.
 
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h2o

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Being comfortable around women should be a given...you should do approaches to become comfortable, yes. But just because you approach and are comfortable, it doesn't mean you'll be getting p*ssy.

I posed a similar question as yours a while back, and here's what the late PRL said:
Originally posted by PuertoRican_Lover
I can approach 100 women and get rejected by the overwhelming of them!! Just because I "approach" doesn't give them a reason to give up the digits!!
So, I took that, and approached more selectively. I'm sure there are girls that give you eyecontact...do you go to bars/clubs btw? It's much easier to pull there.

Yeah, just because you're approaching and comfortable doesn't mean you'll be getting some. Work on your game a bit, be playful/flirtatious...and get in their personal space more. I highly doubt 9/10 girls are not interested in you...I can't tell much by your post though, so really most important thing is have fun and have picking-up be the last thing on your mind, and do whatever your style of game is...

...good luck
 

DonJuanMonk

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being comfortable = others will be comfortable with you depending on the situation. I certainly would prefer hanging around an alert watchful person in an emergency situation. a relaxed comfortable person is totally useless.

that's about it, but no it won't make you successful with chicks.

for a real good example: a homeless guy is very comfortable being on the street, saying whatever he wants. DO YOU THINK THAT EQUALS SUCCESS?
 
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