Does anyone here actually like "talking" to women?

[TheFixer14]

I forced myself to go out last night. I went to this bar on Sunset. It's actually a pretty chill place and the majority of people that go there are nice. I ran into only one b!tchy woman last night and even then I've seen worse.

Anyway, I danced a little bit. But I did not want to talk to any woman. After going to bars and clubs enough and being able to get laid there I've figured out that you can't talk your way into a woman's pants. I noticed these two girls just talked to a bunch of guys all night long and ended up going on home alone. Pointless conversations.

Now, someone might say "just have fun and talk to them!" But isn't the purpose to get laid? That's why I am going to start taking dance lessons soon to up my confidence on the dance floor a bit. And really, what can you gain from a conversation with a woman? The loud music doesn't help either.

But I realized that I don't really like talking to women in general. It's never really about the conversation unless it's work related. It's always about the emotions underneath. And if you don't connect emotionally, then you are done. Most women simply do not engage in intellectual conversations because this is not how they are built. When you are speaking to a woman you have to feel your way through them. You can't logically understand them.

Does anyone else feel this way?

 

[xstang77]

I don't mind talking to them and there's some I have great intellectual convos with it's just there fickleness and flakiness that kills it for me, you can talk about the moon and stars one day then the next they act on there emotions and peace out, fuels my mindset of just Fvck em and leave em.

 

[EyeBRollin]

The women I have intellectual conversations with aren't the women I'm ****ing. If you want to sleep with her, converse as little is needed to do just that (less is always better).

 

[Urbanyst]

I like talking to women who like talking to me.

Sometimes you get good results if you challenge them when they act aloof. One question I like to ask hot women that intimidates them is "Tell me something interesting about yourself?". Throws some of them off because they are used to getting by on looks over personality.

But I'm not always in the mood to challenge a woman. Sometimes I just want to chat and if she makes that difficult or awkward I just leave her alone. I don't like getting tested by a woman right out the gate.

 

[zekko]

I enjoy talking to them, I enjoy their feminine energy. You don't need to be having sex to feel that. It's the whole package that's appealing.

 

[devilkingx2]

I dislike talking to women because they don't share my interests and tend to be too dumb for intelligent discussion (so are most guys, but most guys share my interests)

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

When you are speaking to a woman you have to feel your way through them. You can't logically understand them.

I strongly agree with this. That doesn't mean I don't enjoy talking to them. I don't care really. Sometimes they are a lot more exciting to talk to than men because they have so much more enthusiasm and give off a good vibe. Other times they just say such stupid sh!t that blows my mind at how the answer to their problems is directly in front of them, yet they still choose to go the most convoluted route.

 

[Milano]

I conversed with a teacher I banged, she told me how little money means to her, (since I am a student) but the same evening she managed to talk about how she dated an older guy with a lot of money when she was younger and now she desperately wants to buy a bigger apartment. Oh women.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

I dislike talking to women because they don't share my interests and tend to be too dumb for intelligent discussion (so are most guys, but most guys share my interests)

People don't always have to have the same interests. They can be a good guest into your world and you can be a good host. It feels good when folks open up and allow themselves to experience new things.

 

[fastlife]

If your conversations with women are boring, it's your fault. You're failing to lead; you're expecting her to converse like a man; you're expecting her to give value before she sees you as someone high value.

It's like complaining, "God, I hate talking to 5 year old kids. They never have anything interesting to say--I have to do all the real work and they just say nonsense. They don't know anything substantial about politics or philosophy and they only talk about themselves.

Talk about the things you're interested in and passionate about, and you'll find a lot of interesting & passionate women

 

[hockeyfreak79]

Even as an ambivert I enjoy talking to woman.
Now granted they are doing most of the talking because half the time they won't shut up but that's no always the case. I agree with Zekko as well.

I chatted up this broad last night, just so happens she's engaged and her fiancé is deployed in the military. Ha, 11pm at night she's at the bar ordering drink after drink.

I was talking to another 1 to the right of me, she was receptive but the convo just kind of fizzled out.

I keep intellectual convos for close friends and or fam. Occasionally you can certainly do that with a stranger if they are interested but usually that's not the case.

 

[EmotionalGeek]

I love talking to woman. Voice of her giggling because of my jokes is best thing in my live. Because I am emotionally pretty stable with only three or four moods I like change that she brings to my life with variety of her emotions.

 

[PeasantPlayer]

I love the feminine energy, but women (and people in general) bore me

 

[9Volt]

I conversed with a teacher I banged, she told me how little money means to her, (since I am a student) but the same evening she managed to talk about how she dated an older guy with a lot of money when she was younger and now she desperately wants to buy a bigger apartment. Oh women.

When a chick tells you out of the blue money means little to her it's 99% the opposite. Or she's telling the truth, doesn't save it and spends hers or YOURS if given the chance like nothing. Of course she'll say "money means little to her" as a self-serving public relations statement and have you think "she's not like the others" then give you a heads up right after that because "money means little to her" the next man she meets should "appreciate" her self-serving statement and then spend his money on her to get her a bigger apt or to treat her while she saves her own money for her bigger apt.

 

[9Volt]

I enjoy talking to them, I enjoy their feminine energy. You don't need to be having sex to feel that. It's the whole package that's appealing.

^^^This.

Unless the chick is immature, flakey, or simply acts like a retard. Then again chicks would feel the same talking to a dude that acts those ways.

 

[devilkingx2]

If your conversations with women are boring, it's your fault. You're failing to lead; you're expecting her to converse like a man; you're expecting her to give value before she sees you as someone high value.

It's like complaining, "God, I hate talking to 5 year old kids. They never have anything interesting to say--I have to do all the real work and they just say nonsense. They don't know anything substantial about politics or philosophy and they only talk about themselves.

Talk about the things you're interested in and passionate about, and you'll find a lot of interesting & passionate women

it's not actually possible to have an interesting conversation with a 5 year old because they don't know anything about anything, not sure if that's the most apt comparison to make in defense of women lol.

also gushing about how awesome your favorite hobby is while the other person nods is more masturbation than conversation imo

 

[GoodOne123]

What ive learned:

Being even remotely intellectual or philosophical in a conversation is a turn off for them.

What works is asking about them, listening, and branching off topics into other related things to keep the conversation going.

Occasionally say short witty banter.

Above all be confident.

All that being said, Id say 60% of women I don't particularly like talking to, 40% I like. It seems the older I get the less the latter gets.

 

[Urbanyst]

What ive learned:

Being even remotely intellectual or philosophical in a conversation is a turn off for them.

What works is asking about them, listening, and branching off topics into other related things to keep the conversation going.

Occasionally say short witty banter.

Above all be confident.

All that being said, Id say 60% of women I don't particularly like talking to, 40% I like. It seems the older I get the less the latter gets.

So true. Its almost like women find intelligence and analysis repulsive.

My guess about the reason behind it is because women don't want to deal with men who can see through their bullsh*t. I've learned that it often pays to play dumb in a lot of situations.

The more of a dumbass you are, the more people like you. Stupid people are easier to use and maybe less of a threat emotionally.

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

Talk about the things you're interested in and passionate about, and you'll find a lot of interesting & passionate women

How do you do this without talking too much about yourself? I find myself doing this a lot when I try to make myself seem more relatable but I think it comes of as a little bit egotistic at times without me meaning to.

 

[fastlife]

it's not actually possible to have an interesting conversation with a 5 year old because they don't know anything about anything, not sure if that's the most apt comparison to make in defense of women lol.

But you don't get frustrated, since you know going in what their conversational limits are. You don't take anything they say all that seriously--which is why it's actually a super apt comparison. I'm not defending women--rather attacking a set of expectations that will only lead to frustration.

Even intelligent women, in the company of other women, don't converse 'intelligently' lol--they talk about what would be (from a male perspective) inane bullsh1t. If a woman is even trying to speak to you logically, that means she really really likes you enough to try to appeal to your frame (but most women, especially when you first meet them, won't see that frame as worth the effort). And even the girls who will speak to you logically will probably get more enjoyment from something like:

You: You're crazy. Girls with blonde hair are always psycho.
Her: OMG. No I'm not.
You: Such a liar. I don't like liars.
Her: I'm not lying.
You: I dated a Columbian once--even crazier than blonde girls. She thought I was fvcking her sister....But you're kinda cute. Like a little hobbit. Can you dance?

even though it's all pretty inane and doesn't really make any sense from a logical outflow.

also gushing about how awesome your favorite hobby is while the other person nods is more masturbation than conversation imo

That's how guys experience things. Our friendship are founded in common interest & collaboration. But you'll notice a lot of 'try-hards'--guys you can't stand or that you and your group of guy friends would look at each other and roll your eyes if he came up to talk to you at the bar--do very well with women. He's totally oblivious to the fact that he's annoying everybody and saying dumb sh1t--but watch the girls.

You can go up to a girl and start talking about how vanilla icecream is the greatest thing in the world--about how you love when it melts and dribbles down your chin--and, even if she hates vanilla icecream, based on the strength of the emotions you invoke, she'll nod her head in agreement & think she's having the best conversation in the world--at least until she's attracted. But even before that, you can just tease her, "Oh, you wouldn't understand--you're probably one of those icecream snobs--only Italian ice or a vegan or some sh1t--but vanilla icecream..." and she'll eventually fall into that frame.

How do you do this without talking too much about yourself? I find myself doing this a lot when I try to make myself seem more relatable but I think it comes of as a little bit egotistic at times without me meaning to.

With girls, you don't want to brag. Bragging = qualification, which isn't attractive. So instead of talking about yourself directly, i.e., "I work at a high status job and got employee of the year, since I work hard and I'm smarter than everybody there," you go indirect: "You know a lot of people are afraid to take chance to do the things they love." Instead of say, "I summered in Europe. I traveled first class from London to Paris," you'd say, "Europe is awesome! They just look at things so differently from Americans...life is so much slower there."

You see how you're allowing her to infer qualities about you without actually having to directly lay them out? Those inferences are where she gets the most enjoyment. But that's why passion is important--passion demonstrates that you're familiar with something, probably even skilled or experienced--without having to explain how you're familiar with it.

But in general, rather than starting with "I" stick to structures like:

• Most guys are so thirsty; they probably get in line to buy you drinks. (Girl Code: I don't have to buy girls drink. Yeah, you're attractive & I know how most guys act around you--I'm not socially oblivious--but I'm not thirsty, since I have options.)
• Most girls are really stuck up. They always look for what they can get out of guys. (Girl Code: You don't seem stuck up--that's why I'm talking to you--but I have standards and I won't put up with bullsh1t.)
• A lot of people just get caught up in a routine...go into work every morning...take sh1t from their boss. They're afraid to take chances. (Girl Code: I'm not afraid to take chances. I live on my own term. I'm probably pretty financially successful if I'm not taking sh1t from a boss.)

But don't be afraid to hog the convo upfront--girls desperately want you to.