Does anyone have any advice for me?

[LearningNeverEnds]

I have no problems talking to women. I am 21 black male (22 in two months) that has moderate success with women. It could have been great success if I wasn't shy (fearful) a few years ago.

1. What are some good online sites to meet woman? How should women be approached online? Do women respond more to pictures of men smiling? Serious expression? Participating in some activity?

2. Am I being to narrow-minded in thinking clubs/bars make up the large percentage of how men hook up with chicks? If I am being narrow-minded, what are other popular venues?

3. Since my career is **** for meeting women, and I don't currently attend school... what does one do when his interests include watching TV? I'm being funny, but I can't play an instrument and I don't spend free time at an art show. People always say get a hobby but it's hard for me to think of a hobby I'll enjoy doing, plus one that will have women my age.

 

[realsmoothie]

I'll say one thing... YOU'RE 21 YEARS OLD... CHILL OUT!

You got LOTS of time to goof off. Sounds to me like you're taking your life way too seriously.

 

[LearningNeverEnds]

I don't mean any disrepsect, but why do people always tell me this?

I'm a 21 year old guy that last got some 4 months ago? Why is it cool for other guys to be getting it on, but when I want some action... I am rushing things?

That comment isn't really directed towards you, but my brother and a close friend told me this a little while ago. I should just chill out.

Let me ask you this? Are you chilling out and not getting any booty or hooking up with any girls?

 

[mountain]

Are you opposed to bars or parties? they are by far the easiest venues.

Why is it cool for other guys to be getting it on, but when I want some action... I am rushing things?

That comment isn't really directed towards you, but my brother and a close friend told me this a little while ago. I should just chill out.

My question for you is are you putting in the effort or just feeling bad about not getting laid?

 

[Bvbidd]

Your putting in no effort yet worrying about the outcome.

Worry less about whether you do get laid or not but put in more effort.

People don't say "I want sex. I will get sex."

It just kind of happens in the right time and place.

 

[d9930380]

LearningNeverEnds - Chill out means just that "Chill Out" - Not you shouldn't be getting it on.

I'm actually glad for you that you aren't chilled out and have realised you have a problem. When people say this they really mean:

If you see it as a problem, it will be a problem, if you leave it, it will come naturally.

The problem is, the people saying this either a)are just using something they have heard others say or b)have never had the problem.

And they're thinking but really.... talking about this to you just brings me down.

What i recommend is
a) stop worrying about scoring - it doesn't help you. Get on with your life, don't do things to impress or meet girls, do them becaues they bring YOU happiness.
b) Seize each oportunity - If your unsure about aproaching a girl, aproach her, deal with the consequences later. Ask a girl for her number, then decide to call her or not etc.
c) girls should be a normal part of life - an add-on - not the focus of your life.

Focus more on the articles about self improvement - Then it WILL come naturally.

 

[Faca]

Patience is the key.. Nobody can change over one night sleep!

1. Try joining a gym or some other sport activity, but do it only for you. Meeting chick shouldn't be your top priority.

2. Actually Clubs and Bars are a bit difficult if you haven't much experience.. Don't go to a club in mind just to meet a chicks. Your top priority should be having fun with your friends, and they'll pick up on this.

You can also try chillin' outdoors with your friends, there are a lot of things you can do. Also go sometimes to a local swimming pool or beach when it's hot.

3. You don't need to play an instrument, just find out what makes you special in a cool way, so you can use this to your advantage.

In anything what you do, keep a positive attitude.. you'll see how this attract women. :rockon: