"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Does a woman "stop going for jerks" when her desirability wanes?

JaegerPilot217

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zekko said:
I don't know many people I would consider real jerks either. One dude is an ex-cop, he likes to lord his power over people (he's in a position of some authority). He doesn't do any better with women than anyone else though.

Another is a guy who is probably not very socially calibrated, because he manages to offend people a lot. Mainly because he's very smug and thinks he's right all the time, and usually ends up p!ssing people off. Again, he's no better with women than anybody else, in fact many women will avoid him because he is annoying.

That's why I don't buy into the whole "Women love jerks" business that PUA gurus like to put out. Almost every woman I know is with a guy who is NOT a jerk. So the PUA theory just comes across like a weak fairy tale.

I did know one guy who kind of fit the mold. He was a tough guy, he liked to get drunk and beat people up, a bully I guess you would say. But he was socially calibrated enough that he was pretty cool to talk to (when he was sober). He could get girls. Maybe partly because if he had his eye on a girl, very few men would challenge him because they would get the sh!t kicked out of them lol. He ended up beating a guy to death outside of a bar one night and went to prison. Stories are his tough guy act got him gang raped repeatedly in prison. So even if you would say "Here's an alpha type", you wouldn't want to use him as a role model.
Yup, a woman just has to have a vagina to.be called a woman, in order for a man to be a man he needs more than that
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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ive

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The "jerkness" of a man is based on how much he is liked by women, not the other way around. If a man is spoiled by female attention, he will automatically be a "jerk".

"Choosing" a husband, and being attracted to someone are two different things. For a partner a woman usually aims at a stable choice, more or less within her league. For attraction, she aims above her league in order to feel passion. You cannot feel passion for something that is not at least a bit "out of reach".

If you want a passionate marriage, then you marry a man much above your league, but that is passionate AND painful usually, due to the cheating that happens in such marriages. Depends on your priorities, I know women, who are very happy in such "unbalanced" marriages, regardless of the cheating, because of the very strong love and passion they feel for their husbands. But usually women go for more stable relationships with men within their attractiveness level i.e. "nice guys". For women it will always be easier to get laid, though, if we are talking about pure sex. For men it will always be easier to have relationships/marriages :)
 

Mike32ct

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ive said:
The "jerkness" of a man is based on how much he is liked by women, not the other way around. If a man is spoiled by female attention, he will automatically be a "jerk".

No doubt that a guy spoiled by lots of female attention could end up acting like a jerk. Makes sense.

"Choosing" a husband, and being attracted to someone are two different things. For a partner a woman usually aims at a stable choice, more or less within her league. For attraction, she aims above her league in order to feel passion. You cannot feel passion for something that is not at least a bit "out of reach".

Again, this sadly makes sense. I definitely don't want to get married then. The stable guy is essentially her permanent roommate not her lover.

If you want a passionate marriage, then you marry a man much above your league, but that is passionate AND painful usually, due to the cheating that happens in such marriages. Depends on your priorities, I know women, who are very happy in such "unbalanced" marriages, regardless of the cheating, because of the very strong love and passion they feel for their husbands. But usually women go for more stable relationships with men within their attractiveness level i.e. "nice guys". For women it will always be easier to get laid, though, if we are talking about pure sex. For men it will always be easier to have relationships/marriages :)
No doubt women can get sex easier. Judge Nismo and I discussed the relationship card a few years ago in various posts. While men have SOME relationship power, for most men, it will never come close to being equal to a woman's sexual power. Women can get sex faster than ordering a pizza. Most men would be lucky to land a gf in several weeks. Plus, women are the gatekeepers for sex AND relationships.

But overall, I enjoyed your brutally honest post :).
 
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