Do you think women that keep their ex-husband's last name are alpha-widows?

[MatureDJ]

I recall talking to a childless, divorced chick that was newly single but had kept her ex-husband's last name. I have also read that Elizabeth Warren has kept for first husband's name, even after remarrying. It seems to me that a woman that doesn't want to take her new husband's name is signalling that she finds her earlier husband to be superior to her current one. Of course, I could understand a woman with children keeping the name of her children, but then again, a man would be incredibly beta to marry a single mommy.

Also, I have no problem with a widow, staying unmarried, keeping her husband's name, as she is a real widow.

 

[DelayedGratification]

Good question. It's only been 18mo since the final decree, and my ex has not gone back to her maiden name, at least not that I'm aware of. And she was pretty butthurt about me insisting that we were done.

That said, there's a lot of extenuating circumstances in this case. As a medical professional, she uses her maiden name partly because that's what her degrees lists, and partly for privacy reasons. So in a sense she never stopped using her maiden name in a big part of her life. The other thing could be that she might be concerned about how our boys might react to her suddenly making that switch.

 

[Who Dares Win]

Cant really tell you exactly but not to sound boring I would still again follow that one single general rule.

If something a woman does/does not somehow makes you uncomfortable at a gut level, there is something wrong behind it.

 

[backseatjuan]

Women take last name of husband during marriage (unless it’s some kind of beta fck marriage) and after divorce they don’t bother. Case in point my mother and millions of other women.

Now if they keep their original last name during marriage and hubby takes it, that’s either hubby is a beta fck or she had some interesting last name to begin with, like elite or some sht like that.

Nothing wrong with keeping last name after divorce, it’s customary.

 

[Atom Smasher]

I asked a woman about that once and she said it was just too much trouble to change the name. I suspect that there’s also some kind of identity component at work here, or that changing back to the maiden name is a realization of loss.

My fiancé is a widow, and is using her married name for now, but will of course become “Mrs. Smasher” when we get married.

 

[2Rocky]

1) it is a PITA to change it
2) It is hard for kids who have a different last name than their mother for schoolteachers to make the connection.
3) they often have created work and social connections under the married name, that connection would be lost if they went back to their maiden name.
4) they have more years with the married name than maiden name.


Same goes for women who keep the maiden name.

Women who go to the trouble of reverting back to their maiden name are trying to escape the reputation of the family they married into.