Do You Think This Really "AFC" or Am I Just Too Worried?

[~attrACTION~]

Hi again. This post is not really about myself, personally.

Rather, I have a little cousin who I am sort of concerned about. I think these are the types of 'situations' that add to my life worries sometimes. But then again, I could be overthinking it.

Anyhow, we otherwise live in different states, but she and some other family have come over to visit for break. In some random conversation, she says she has a boyfriend who takes her out to some really - and I mean REALLY - expensive dinners. Their last date was $100, just dinner for 2 at a restaurant! $100!? She said "it's cool, because it's not her money."

Now, I know guys do chumpish stuff, but that's a whole wad of cash to casually throw down on just a dinner (not to mention, most college students are not loaded, making you wonder). She told me it's okay because on average their dates ONLY come out to about $80 for dinner for 2. Mind you, my cousin is barely a freshman in college, and this is the first time I am hearing of her having any sort of "boyfriends."

I didn't pry at it much during the conversation, but I was concerned because she is sometimes very naive. I wonder how much this guy is thinking of returns on his investment or what. Is this just what a typical chump does, is it out-of-the-ordinary, or am I worrying too much?

I care for my family members alot, so how do I let her know to be careful and not naive, while not ruining anything for her? In the moment I just said, "well, you're doing something right, lol."

I come from a sort of family that is not typical. They have double standards. For instance, while it's great for the women in the family to find guys who put them on a pedestal, my brothers and I are encouraged to find many women who treat us like Gods - being a player is encouraged for both sexes. Although I personally have not really lived up to that expectation much yet.

I only posted this because I am honestly undecided about how to react to it, if at all...So, anyhow, should I mention any hint of advice or just keep this to myself?

Thanks.

 

[Teflon_Mcgee]

Keep it to yourself.
AFC is an attitude not a defineable, definate set of actions.

As as AFC I dropped $80 on a dinnner.
As a DJ I still will drop $80 on a dinner.

And trust me, there is a HUGE difference between the two even though they are both the exact ame action.

Chances are he's an AFC. But is that your problem? I know I've tried to help guys I wanted my cousin to like but in the end it doesnt' really matter.

She'll find what she needs and he'll either seek out answers or stay F'ed the rest of his life.

In the end it all works out.

 

[~attrACTION~]

Keep it to yourself.
AFC is an attitude not a defineable, definate set of actions.

As as AFC I dropped $80 on a dinnner.
As a DJ I still will drop $80 on a dinner.

And trust me, there is a HUGE difference between the two even though they are both the exact ame action.

Chances are he's an AFC. But is that your problem? I know I've tried to help guys I wanted my cousin to like but in the end it doesnt' really matter.

She'll find what she needs and he'll either seek out answers or stay F'ed the rest of his life.

In the end it all works out.

^thanks. Yeah, I just wanted to help out. I'm not so sure about the $80 dinner thing, but you're right, I'm not in a position to be judging that. Still, I would be interested to know if it's totally out of line to say anything or not. I'm glad you seem like you've "been there done that" and didn't just give some irrational 2-word answer.

It's not a big deal, I guess I over-react to such things because in my family/culture we sometimes get concerned with these trivial things. It's tough to explain, but think of Greek/Italian mafia sort of families where a guy would beat up any dude who bought their sister the wrong color of roses or something ridiculous like that.