"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Do you think people are generally happy to meet new people?

S

Special T

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Guy has no friends. Guy wants friends. Guy begins going out and doing different things in hopes to make friends. Guy is not a weirdo. Will guy be successful?

I ask this because people can be very stand-offish. If you're hanging out with your male friends and some dude comes along and tries to be friendly... how will you react?

What advice do you have for guy? When are people most accepting of new friends?
 

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L

lakeshore

Don Juan
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I struggle in this area also. I wasn't very good at being friendly and I've made a conscious decision to change that recently.

I've met people that can make new friends in a flash and with what appears to be little effort. But they have a very friendly and genuine personality (so it seems) that makes this "easy" for them.

For me, I haven't had that genuine interest in people which is really bad. I'm trying to change that. I really am starting to understand that about myself and hate it.

Once you get more people friendly you can just join a club or something and make new friends. Try meetup.com
 
P

PlaysToWin

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Try and "bring something" to a circle of friends you are trying to join. For example, if you have a wicked sense of humour and can make people laugh or are great at telling crazy stories, or you have a place that can be used for house parties, or are just generally a fun guy to be around, etc. Have something that gives you value as a friend, then people will be eager to include you in their circles.
 
E

Ease

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If the person offering his company and extending a hand of friendship is of high value, then people are happy to meet people. If he is lower value, then he can contribute nothing and his presence isn't cherished.

If 50 cent walks up to you and asks your opinion on something, you would immediately be very happy to accept him into your circle.

If the intruder is a total nerd with no social value, then your response would be the opposite.

The key to it is being 'high value'.
 
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