"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Do you think chicks cringe at public marriage proposals because they have to make a split-second hypergamy determination?

MatureDJ

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I was looking at an article about this, and it got me thinking. The reason that so many women cringe at this is because by accepting the proposal, a woman has to say to herself, "this is the best I can hope for", and the hamster brain wants to make sure that this is the right decision.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Alvafe

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if they cringy it means she is not sure of him yet, and at that time she have to decide if he is or not, and then happen the problem, there is other people around to confirm her decision and that makes diffiult for her to back down later

they just don't want to be acountable for they decision nothing more or less
 

Hal9000

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I would hate it because its a transparently manipulative attempt to force her to say yes by putting her on the spot in front of a bunch of people. Not exactly the actions of someone who loves you.
 

MillionBillionaire

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I believe that deep down inside a woman will love whatever attention and validation she would get and whatever happens don't really matter because she got her moment in the spotlight.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Who Dares Win

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I dont like agreements between parts than involve third parts even as specators.
 
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