AllDay85
Senior Don Juan
If you're not exclusive and both spinning plates, does it ever gross you guys out knowing some other guy smashed that recently? Just curious.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
I have a plate ask for exclusive, i said no, there next day she sends me snap vids with another guy. Hoes these days.A little bit. But, what they do outside of my presence isn't really my concern.
The real problems start, if a woman decides to rub it in your face. I've had quite a few women attempt to make me jealous in this manner. I think the reason they do it is because this sort of thing (jealousy) creates attraction for them, so they think it'll create attraction for us. However, they don't understand that social proof doesn't work on men. It just makes me feel disgusted, disrespected, and generally p*ssed off.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
If you're not exclusive and both spinning plates, does it ever gross you guys out knowing some other guy smashed that recently? Just curious.
Hall of fame stuffEvery day I have less of both desire to be exclusive with women and problem with not being so. The process started only recently, when I was thinking about all this stuff and asked myself why I needed validation from a woman in the first place. I asked myself, what's the ultimate reason why I care about a woman's traits and history? Why does it matter to me whether for example she's a slvt or not? I came to the conclusion that it only matters if you are invested in her to some point. If you derive some kind of self-worth from her. If your ego is invested in pride, security, or whatever based not on yourself but her - if you are invested (which is different from liking someone), then it matters. If you don't hold her up to an ideal and you derive no self-worth from someone else fulfilling that ideal, you are freed of it.
Let me make an example. You are a brand enthusiast and look only for shirts that are originals by the right brand. But one day you just stop caring about it. Someone points out that the shirt you're now wearing is by a low-prestige brand. You do not start to defend your choice by saying that it is actually good quality or whatever. You simply aren't affected because the brand is no longer something that you are invested in, it'd be like someone insulting the design of your tax folder. You hold no value in the ideal of a brand or whatever you could call it. You just like the shirt - it's comfortable and looks good on you, and that's it. You can have many shirts or keep using that one, just don't steal them from others (corresponding to doing stuff like cheating on a hypothetical "good" girl who is in it to have a family). The only reason why you'd care now is you want to provide a good environment for the labourers who made the shirt, so they don't grow up in child sweatshops (corresponding to only having kids with a woman who is suitable for them, so they can be raised in a good environment).
I hope this brief explanation got my point of view across fully. It's a complete mentality shift for me. I consider it to be a different perspective or perhaps an evolution of what I think was @logicallefty 's "beer theory" of women.
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
How do you communicate that you don't care, without being overt? Women are crazy. I don't get her motive, she keeps seeing me, fu**ing me, and seemingly shi* testing me by trying to make me jealous.It's laughable when women think they have the ability to make me jealous. I've had several women ATTEMPT to make me jealous and it always back fires. I just act indifferent towards their attempt to make me jealous. I'll tell her "thats nice to know" or "thats cool" in a tone of disinterest to show that I couldn't care less.
Having jealousy in your heart is not healthy. Anyways, I couldn't be jealous if I wanted to. It's just something I can't do. The fact that women use such a tactic in an attempt to stir up my emotions is amusing to me, because it'll never work; a tactic as petty as that. I can't and will never be jealous over a man and another woman? Why? There's plenty of ther woman on this world, plus: I'm not worried about what another's woman's doing with another man. The ONLY thing that would be on MY mind is what I'm doing with a female.
I don't worry about the business of other people; it's none of my concern (which includes what women do with other guys). All I'm worried about is what I'm doing (including what I'm doing with females)
What women do with other men is their business and has no value towards me; I just don't care.
It can reaaaallly get annoying though when they try to RUB in your face that they're getting other guys. I just don't care and I'm pretty sure I've made this known; so why do you insist to tell me what you're business is with other males? What you're doing with him is none of my concern. I don't care.
How do you communicate that you don't care, without being overt? Women are crazy. I don't get her motive, she keeps seeing me, fu**ing me, and seemingly shi* testing me by trying to make me jealous.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.