"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Do you really see dating as a "game"?

Splendidostring

Don Juan
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Hi guys,

I've been thinking about it for a couple of days. Thinking about how dating can be a "game" for some people. I also realized I really don't see dating as a game.
For me, dating is about connecting with someone. Like I said in my other post, I need some chemistry. Of course I have fun seducing girls, but my real optic is to find girl(s) I can REALLY feel myself around. Sure, there will be test and other stuff, but I choose to believe it's possible to find one or more girls I can love. Hell, there's BILLIONS of girls in the world, I know I can find at least one that can really dig me and vice-versa :).

What do you think?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Joined
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I view it the same way. Fundamentally, I'm looking for a connection to share with someone and have that rush that you get when you feel excited about seeing someone that could go anywhere.

However, it seems I play games with myself (i.e. trying to deal with nerves, conflicting or even contradictory intentions (i.e. wanting to connect sexually, vs. moral/religious values), etc....) than to even think about dating as a game, but to each their own.
 

BustedKnucks

Don Juan
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Dating is 100% a game. Sometimes, even if you really like a girl, and she genuinely likes you, you have to play this game in order to fulfill certain expectations before a relationship even has a chance to develop. It's stupid, but that's romance in America. My boss's daughter today was complaining that she'd never been out on a date. I told her that's because she isn't attracted to the type of guy that would ask her on a date. Women of our generation are all floozies. They want to be charmed off their feet by confidence and swagger, not roses and a candle-lit dinners.
 

Casually

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Dating *is* a game in the sense that it has certain rules, and that you can adopt certain strategies that will improve your success, a la game theory. It's not so much a "game" in the sense of "I'm just doing this for fun without any emotional commitment", although it can certainly be played that way.
 

Following_of_Me

Don Juan
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It depends on my mood. Sometimes I feel like chillin, then dating is just a part of life that comes and goes as I please, if I see a girl I'm interested in, I'll see what happens. But other times I'm bored, and when I'm bored I'll just look for a challenge, and then life in general becomes a game. On more than a few occasions I've challenged friends to get girls, or simply challenged myself by sayin "Alright, I'm bored...where's there a woman, I need a good hunt." in which case, yes, it is definitely a game.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Four_Aces

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It's a game until it gets serious. Then comes the kids, the house, soccer practice, and stretch marks from the C-Section.
 

Paintballguy

Master Don Juan
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Four_Aces said:
It's a game until it gets serious. Then comes the kids, the house, soccer practice, and stretch marks from the C-Section.
Don't forget the hallway sex. When you and your spouse pass each other in the hallway, you both say "**** you".
 

Splendidostring

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Hola guys

Hehe "Following of me". I can relate to what you're saying. Sometimes you meet a girl you really enjoy being with and then it seems natural. But sometimes, there's nothing in stock and as you said when you get bored, you're gonna seek some pleasure.
 

rushing dude 123

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i hate to say it but i saw it like a hunt lol, i would never ever do a one night stand its to easy, even when i can, i like a hunt so i do the whole dating thing because i find it way much enjoyable and when i do get a girl wanting to do it i leave it (unless i got some serious connection). Its like when fencing u disarm there sword and ur just about to stab them but u decide to walk away, but just knowing u could is enough.

And now i am at a stage where i only hunt things worth my time, i don't hunt small frys, i only go for the big catches lol girls u actually connect to. It ****s my mind up though, because once i have something i don't want it anymore because the whole chase is gone lol. But i am freshning up my mind set is bit better now, but once u get to into the game side of things its hard to get out. But i will take both sides on board and decide whats the best route to take. I feel i should hold back now and not rush things.....lol, but rather just take each step slow so u can enjoy the scenery much more, but have the edge because u still have knowledge of the game.
 
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