Do you keep women in orbit while in a relationship?

[CornbreadFed]

There’s no cheating in bf-gf situations. Lol.

All I am saying is that if you are going to cheat, cheat smart lol not like a beta simp in a scarcity mindset. Everyone says they won't cheat, but not if Sydney Sweenie is throwing you a softball pitch and you are out of town at a hotel bar chilling.

 

[Vanderdonck]

All I am saying is that if you are going to cheat, cheat smart lol not like a beta simp in a scarcity mindset. Everyone says they won't cheat, but not if Sydney Sweenie is throwing you a softball pitch and you are out of town at a hotel bar chilling.

Of course it's smarter to do as you described.

But that's not what the OP was getting at, I don't think. This is simply about not isolating yourself from women (or anyone) just because you're in an LTR. A man should be naturally attracting people, always. Doesn't equal cheating.

 

[Datinglife26]

Of course it's smarter to do as you described.

But that's not what the OP was getting at, I don't think. This is simply about not isolating yourself from women (or anyone) just because you're in an LTR. A man should be naturally attracting people, always. Doesn't equal cheating.

Right im not even talking about cheating. I'm more so asking to you even entertain women who approach you, online or in person. And by entertain I mean do you cut conversations short/don't reply or just use it as an opportunity to stay sharp but not crossing any lines (ie cheating or emotional cheating)

Your response is answering my question most closely.

Honestly I didnt really have a set idea of what way to handle this. I know I get more looks and attention from other women while I'm with my girlfriend because she is tall and attractive. Hell other girls come up to her and compliment her while she's with me.

 

[Datinglife26]

All I am saying is that if you are going to cheat, cheat smart lol not like a beta simp in a scarcity mindset. Everyone says they won't cheat, but not if Sydney Sweenie is throwing you a softball pitch and you are out of town at a hotel bar chilling.

Bro at the minute im going through a big titty craving, I'd like to think i could hold strong but Sydney Sweenie is a challenge

 

[DJ Novice]

Side pieces are great; they satisfy my need for variety. Just don’t expect them to hang around for long.

There’s a reason why they call it ‘spinning plates’. Plates will eventually fall off and you need to replace them.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Of course it's smarter to do as you described.

But that's not what the OP was getting at, I don't think. This is simply about not isolating yourself from women (or anyone) just because you're in an LTR. A man should be naturally attracting people, always. Doesn't equal cheating.

Friendly engagement with women while in the LTR and wasting time and energy on orbiters especially exes because of a scarcity mindset are two different things. For example, today I just bullshvtted with some bartender because the vibe connected and I got a free drink out of it. I had no intentions on getting her number or cheating on my partner, just being social lol. With orbiters, you are actually putting time and effort that could be spent elsewhere on women you see as second place or worse because you are scared of being broken up. Not only are emotionally cheating but you are also potentially putting yourself in the position to physically cheat.

If you want to spin plates and have multiple options, then don't get into a LTR and waste each other's time.

 

[Vanderdonck]

Right im not even talking about cheating. I'm more so asking to you even entertain women who approach you, online or in person. And by entertain I mean do you cut conversations short/don't reply or just use it as an opportunity to stay sharp but not crossing any lines (ie cheating or emotional cheating)

Your response is answering my question most closely.

Honestly I didnt really have a set idea of what way to handle this. I know I get more looks and attention from other women while I'm with my girlfriend because she is tall and attractive. Hell other girls come up to her and compliment her while she's with me.

Well my woman (been together a long time) is emotionally mature and not jealous. She knows other women will approach me or talk to me and that I'm a red blooded male with a penis, but also that I'm not stupid. I'm just a guy with plenty of charisma and attraction and if she doesn't want that she can be with someone a few notches lower. Ditto me: her. Truth is she likes the fact that women like me.

Too many guys get manipulated by controlling/jealous women and they walk on eggshells when it comes to the opposite sex. In the moment jealousy is normal but making it part of her personality is a big red flag. Ain't no one got time for that. I've been in that paradigm and it just doesn't work for me.

On top of all that people are going to do what they're going to do and it's not my job to control them. I can control how I react and manage myself, that's it.

So yeah, women orbit me, that's just how I am, my woman is fine with it. Same as I know a lot of guys wanna bang her.

Friendly engagement with women while in the LTR and wasting time and energy on orbiters especially exes because of a scarcity mindset are two different things. For example, today I just bullshvtted with some bartender because the vibe connected and I got a free drink out of it. I had no intentions on getting her number or cheating on my partner, just being social lol. With orbiters, you are actually putting time and effort that could be spent elsewhere on women you see as second place or worse because you are scared of being broken up. Not only are emotionally cheating but you are also potentially putting yourself in the position to physically cheat.

If you want to spin plates and have multiple options, then don't get into a LTR and waste each other's time.

I see your point, but I don't see orbiters and plates as the same thing. Orbiters are just women (or people) drawn to you. Not plates you are actively banging. If you don't have at least a small constellation of people that want to be around you, you're isolating yourself or doing something wrong IMO. Can be platonic but there will always be women who would fukk you if they could, that's just life.

 

[CornbreadFed]

I see your point, but I don't see orbiters and plates as the same thing. Orbiters are just women (or people) drawn to you. Not plates you are actively banging. If you don't have at least a small constellation of people that want to be around you, you're isolating yourself or doing something wrong IMO. Can be platonic but there will always be women who would fukk you if they could, that's just life.

I get it what you are saying too. My definition of a plate or orbiter is a female that you have to spend time and energy on to keep her spinning or floating around you. You do not necessarily have to have sex with them, but you do have to keep their attention on you. In addition, why would you need validation from other people if you are always improving yourself? I work out regularily, scaling up my business, travelling the world and ect. Why should I give af about what some random or past female thinks of me especially if I am trying to move up in life?

 

[Vanderdonck]

I get it what you are saying too. My definition of a plate or orbiter is a female that you have to spend time and energy on to keep her spinning or floating around you. You do not necessarily have to have sex with them, but you do have to keep their attention on you. In addition, why would you need validation from other people if you are always improving yourself? I work out regularily, scaling up my business, travelling the world and ect. Why should I give af about what some random or past female thinks of me especially if I am trying to move up in life?

Nobody's saying you have to give af or seek validation. Simply by being who I am, I attract people. It's just a byproduct of a life well lived. So there's no time and energy needed other than being friendly and normal.

The point is not to be wasting energy trying to keep women around. They will hang around because they want to, simple as that. And yeah people come and go, that's life, but there are always orbiters. TBH I don't have time for everyone and end up turning down a lot of offers to hang out or do things.

 

[CoolWave1331]

I know five different women that I can get with under the right circumstances. Right circumstances being distance and relationship status; 3 of the 5 are currently seeing someone so these are no go's.

Most of these women I met through my core friend group. Over the years we would throw parties and bring new people etc. Everyone knows obviously (what you did) but it's not talked about it or seen as a big deal. Because we are all friends - if she were to speak bad about me and cause trouble within the group, my other friends would push back against her, so there's no drama.

The one's I didn't meet through my friend group there is physical attractio but we are also friends. You won't always be so lucky. Some women after some time will hit you with an ultimatum (if we can't be serious we won't talk anymore) and then you have the one's that are very upfront about this and it goes nowhere. I've had both of these scenarios happen many times.

There's no guarantee's but if you can manage to be a good friend to her (and have also already "been" with her) she'll be more likely to stick around. Be visible, get out there and get involved with stuff, then opportunity will present itself. It's much harder to succeed at this stuff solo esp after certain age.

 

[CornbreadFed]

The point is not to be wasting energy trying to keep women around. They will hang around because they want to, simple as that. And yeah people come and go, that's life, but there are always orbiters. TBH I don't have time for everyone and end up turning down a lot of offers to hang out or do things.

If you are in a LTR or marriage, who are these other women having to constantly hang around you? I have female friends, but they have better shvt to do and so do I. When we hang out, they usually hangout with me and my LTR or we do double dates for the ones in relationships.

 

[Vanderdonck]

If you are in a LTR or marriage, who are these other women having to constantly hang around you? I have female friends, but they have better shvt to do and so do I. When we hang out, they usually hangout with me and my LTR or we do double dates for the ones in relationships.

Nobody has to be around me if they don't want to. I have a healthy social life within and without my LTR. If I were only to socialize within the framework of a couple then it just wouldn't work for me. I've been in that situation before and for me it was suffocating.

 

[Desdinova]

Simple question, when you're in a LTR do you at least talk to other women?

It's not entirely about keeping other women in orbit, it's about other women keeping you as an option (high score theory heavily in play). I have women in my vicinity that I'm not necessarily interested in, but I know that if me and my GF split up, they're all going to come out of the woodwork and get in line.

 

[CornbreadFed]

Nobody has to be around me if they don't want to. I have a healthy social life within and without my LTR. If I were only to socialize within the framework of a couple then it just wouldn't work for me. I've been in that situation before and for me it was suffocating.

Yes, I agree that we all need to have space and independence from our SO, but why does that have to pertain to actively seeking validation from other women? If you have to try, then you are just playing games at this point.

 

[Vanderdonck]

Yes, I agree that we all need to have space and independence from our SO, but why does that have to pertain to actively seeking validation from other women? If you have to try, then you are just playing games at this point.

I never said I was seeking validation. It's just how life goes.