do you guys let the girl initiate?

[HappyHarryHardon]

im talking like girls youve had sex with several times, even gf/bf. when you finish hanging out one night does she ask what ur doing on so and so day? or do you just let her go home and wait for her to ask you out again? sometimes i feel when im with my girl that when she goes home i dont want to ask what shes doing next week or whatever cause i'd feel needy? she usually just asks what im doing on the same day and we arrange something for next week. but im asking for times when none of us do. should i be calling during the week and try to arrange something or leave that up to her? i remember reading someone saying that after you have sex with a girl you don't have to chase her anymore and she'll do all the initiating?

 

[Matthew Lyon]

im talking like girls youve had sex with several times, even gf/bf. when you finish hanging out one night does she ask what ur doing on so and so day? or do you just let her go home and wait for her to ask you out again? sometimes i feel when im with my girl that when she goes home i dont want to ask what shes doing next week or whatever cause i'd feel needy? she usually just asks what im doing on the same day and we arrange something for next week. but im asking for times when none of us do. should i be calling during the week and try to arrange something or leave that up to her? i remember reading someone saying that after you have sex with a girl you don't have to chase her anymore and she'll do all the initiating?

I'm going to help you out here, HappyHarryHardon, because you're asking the wrong question.

Here's the question you're trying to ask: "How do I find what I'm passionate about doing in life?"

Truthfully answer that question and your worry about chasing is over.

 

[Your_Royal_Flyness]

im talking like girls youve had sex with several times, even gf/bf. when you finish hanging out one night does she ask what ur doing on so and so day? or do you just let her go home and wait for her to ask you out again? sometimes i feel when im with my girl that when she goes home i dont want to ask what shes doing next week or whatever cause i'd feel needy? she usually just asks what im doing on the same day and we arrange something for next week. but im asking for times when none of us do. should i be calling during the week and try to arrange something or leave that up to her? i remember reading someone saying that after you have sex with a girl you don't have to chase her anymore and she'll do all the initiating?

There's nothing wrong with having a woman initiate sex and meeting up with you. A lot of guys come off very needy and "thirsty". HOWEVER, there's a balance. You need to be secure enough with yourself enough to know that if you want to hang out, you can initiate it.

Here's a solution: don't ask. Invite. e.g.

"Hey, let's hang out at [place] on [day] at [time]...I wouldn't mind seeing you."

Although you're inviting her out, you'll avoiding appearing needy. However, be careful. Women are not attracted to insecure men and it may eventually drive her away.

Good luck!

 

[mahoney]

no hard and fast rule to this, sometimes i ask them, sometimes i don't - depends on the girl!

some they initiate more than i do, some i initiate more than they do, sometimes about the same, it all depends on what feels natural at the time. don't worry too much about some strict rule, just make sure what you're doing feels natural and make sure you're not crowding them or pressuring them.

also i agree with what the other person there said about inviting not asking