Well...I've been there like quite a few guys on this forum, and moved on and gotten over it. I was curious, though. Have any of you who once had oneitis on a woman ever had an experience where she actually regretted that things were over between you too? Where she ran into you and gave you a look that seemed to express some kind of regret or suggest that she would have liked to say something to you and have a conversation? I ran into my old oneitis some time last week at my gym, the 35 year old woman I had written about earlier. We ran into each other in the hallway and she gave me this look that I can't really describe in words. We basically both looked straight into each other's eyes but didn't say anything to one another.
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Do "Oneitis" Women Ever Feel Regret Sometimes?
- Thread starter Frank2500
- Start date
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Sure they feel regret about losing a friend. But a male friend to a girl is a dime a dozen. They are more guys like you out there where she feels regrets when SHE RUNS INTO THEM AFTER SLEEPING WITH HER BOYFRIEND.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
I've been fortunate as not to have been susceptible to oneitis but I have had a couple of LTR ex's approach me about getting back together (I actually worked at the same company as one). I didn't have any feelings toward reconnecting with them but I'll admit it did feel good telling them "Although we had some really good times together I'm sure that we're not good fit for one another any more." 
WhitePimp
Master Don Juan
It happened with this girl I used to work with. I didn't have super-oneitis for her, I was actually pretty smooth but she had a boyfriend and I couldnt break them up. Eventually I lost interest and they broke up some months after I quit. I came back like a year later just to see some old people there and she was still there and just gave me this look like she was expecting me to have become this fat slob and not the immensely attractive person I've become and she wanted to reconnect. It felt good...I have no animosity toward her or the situation, but it feels great to know a girl I wanted to pulverize wants to **** me.
Also, many hot ass girls from high school who ignored me because I was a putz now look supremely haggard, and are surprised as hell to see how I've changed for the better. I doubt they're dying to jump all over me, but still, now they're the ones who have no idea what to say to me because I've ascended past their league.
Also, many hot ass girls from high school who ignored me because I was a putz now look supremely haggard, and are surprised as hell to see how I've changed for the better. I doubt they're dying to jump all over me, but still, now they're the ones who have no idea what to say to me because I've ascended past their league.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Basically what it comes down to is: Don't get confused and try to analyse what is going on in her head. Once a woman losses interest in a guy, its pretty much a lost cause. Look at her actions not her words or facial expressions. Don't fall into the trap of thinking: "she is giving me this look because she wants me" because you will end up in the same spot all over again.Frank2500 said:
Move on with your life and hit on other women. Its never a good idea to revisit the past.
jophil28
Master Don Juan
I said to my Ex G/f when she called me again,' You deserve to be with someone who is more like YOU." ( she got offended -Why ?)
It sounded like she felt insulted - a slap?
Maybe that was a really good line to push her away ?
It sounded like she felt insulted - a slap?
Maybe that was a really good line to push her away ?
Re:
Thanks for the feedback. The 35 year old Oneitis actually sent me a text message on our last contact along those lines as well: "In retrospect, you are right. I did not feel the same way that you did. You deserve to be with someone who does. Please don't contact me again."
Looking back, I'm actually shocked at what ever drew me to her in the first place, as I now find her very unattractive both physically and in conduct, and strongly believe that I deserve better. But back then, I was so upset with how she treated me and I unleashed my anger at her. I replied that I hope she meets someone who will treat her the same way and even worse and that she shouldn't misinterpret my text message as an attempt to regain contact with her because I have moved on. I told her that she was just too superficial and vain for me and that for a woman her age, it's a disgrace.
Anyway, reflectively, she was quite too old for me, even though I am 28. I don't think I would have wanted to have a longterm relationship with her in the first place. Nonetheless, seeing her face again at the gym brought back so many painful memories and it reopened the wounds in my heart. I just did my best to ignore her. At one point, when I had to lift weights on a machine several feet away from the treadmill where she was running, she looked up at me and gave me this look as if she thought perhaps I was trying to approach her to confront her. I just ignored, her did my 34 reps and showed off my masculinity to great effect.
Thanks for the feedback. The 35 year old Oneitis actually sent me a text message on our last contact along those lines as well: "In retrospect, you are right. I did not feel the same way that you did. You deserve to be with someone who does. Please don't contact me again."
Looking back, I'm actually shocked at what ever drew me to her in the first place, as I now find her very unattractive both physically and in conduct, and strongly believe that I deserve better. But back then, I was so upset with how she treated me and I unleashed my anger at her. I replied that I hope she meets someone who will treat her the same way and even worse and that she shouldn't misinterpret my text message as an attempt to regain contact with her because I have moved on. I told her that she was just too superficial and vain for me and that for a woman her age, it's a disgrace.
Anyway, reflectively, she was quite too old for me, even though I am 28. I don't think I would have wanted to have a longterm relationship with her in the first place. Nonetheless, seeing her face again at the gym brought back so many painful memories and it reopened the wounds in my heart. I just did my best to ignore her. At one point, when I had to lift weights on a machine several feet away from the treadmill where she was running, she looked up at me and gave me this look as if she thought perhaps I was trying to approach her to confront her. I just ignored, her did my 34 reps and showed off my masculinity to great effect.