Do kill our manhood with pickup?

[IShotTheSheriff]

we <- i just want to give you the missing word from the topic

Hi everyone.
After over a year dealing with Pichup stuff I realy wonder.

There are some good advices out there - the lessons of pook for instance which revolve around the nature of a man an a woman and habites of a man which do not fit his manhood and therefore make him unhappy and in consequence unable to get the right woman for him.


But I guess 90% of the PU theory out there is bull****?
Why? Because it preaches water but drinks wine - as on of our sayings goes.

90% of the PU theory and book teach you about the alpha male. How he is not interested in pleasing anyone especialy not woman since he is not needy. Also he is strong and authentic because he makes no secret of his intentions and is a honest do god guy in this matter. Then they wrap it up in some biological and historical background to give it a scientific touch.

But after this introduction what they teach you is a different thing. The tell you to fake thos behaviours a aplha would show. They tell you all sorts of technics to make woman laugh, to make things interresting, to entertain them. Also they rationalize all kinds of bad behaviour from woman you would never accept from anyone else and tell you if you cant deal with it its your fault. And if its ypur fault you have to work harder to become more attractive to woman.

In Essence they tell you to do all kinds of things which they called BETA at the beginning. They tell you to make woman the center of your universe, to work hard to be attractive to them, to entertain them. They say its the "***** diagnose mode" to rationalize all kinds of disrespectfull behaviour. And a few pages later they offer all kinds of weired explanations for the same disrespectfull behaviour along with some canned material to overcome this.
Also they tell you to not glorify woman and to see them as something godlike. But if your read careufully through tips and hints given from the community you will realize, that in 99.9% of all cases they will tell you that the woman did nothing wrong. She is always right, she did pretty clever there and all of this was your fault because you acted "unworthy".

Please dont concider this an offence against this board.
Since I found the works of Pook and others here it probably helped me more than any other source.
Its just the big picture that I got from dealing with PU for over a year.

 

[zekko]

I think you overstated your case a little bit, but I do agree with you, generally.

In Essence they tell you to do all kinds of things which they called BETA at the beginning. They tell you to make woman the center of your universe, to work hard to be attractive to them, to entertain them.

Yeah, they say the alpha does what he wants and won't change for the woman. But pickup teaches you to completely change your personality to please women. Which is beta in itself, isn't it?

They say on this forum specifically NOT to make women the center of your universe. But pickup gurus, no matter what else they may tell you, will say things like go out to clubs five times a week and practice game. If that's not making women a very high priority, I don't know what is.

They say its the "***** diagnose mode" to rationalize all kinds of disrespectfull behaviour. And a few pages later they offer all kinds of weired explanations for the same disrespectfull behaviour along with some canned material to overcome this.

Right, I don't like to play games, so I won't deal with bad behavior. Pickup teaches you all these little tricks to deal with bad behavior. But I prefer to not play at all, I don't tolerate BS. That's the advantage of being older and having options, I guess. When you're younger and you're out looking to get laid, you almost HAVE to have the pvssy. And that puts you in a bad position.

 

[Mike32ct]

I agree with the OP.

Certainly the most alpha thing you can do is just life your life to it's fullest and not give a F about women except for those you meet that are worthy.

But there is no guarantee that women will chase you despite the fact that you focus on other areas of your life.

Not to get off topic, but that is problem I'm having. I've got a pretty good life that works for me as far as a job, hobbies/interests, etc., and at thus point, i don't even care about finding a relationship. But I still like to get laid once in a while. But it requires a Herculean effort whether it's in the field or online. If I just ignore women and do my own thing and not give a F, as recommended, women don't give a F either.

So it becomes a balancing act between being true to yourself and sometimes selling out a bit for some occassional poon.

 

[backseatjuan]

You become what you think and do. Fake an alpha male and become one.

Don't have to use a guide either.

Become friends with an alpha male and do what he does. Your friend will have an influence on you.

 

[coochieman]

F*ck PU or whatever, What pickup s*** have you been reading ? I really do not care about pickup whatever blah blah.....

ALL that matters is ALPHA-ISM! You have to be TOP DOG! This isn't about only girls. This is EVERYTHING, for jobs, for human relations, for unwarranted favor, for status .... i don't know how to live without being the leader any longer.

Who the f*ck are we fooling here? Lemme ask you... If you already consider yourself an alpha male now, did you really just become an alpha male immediately you read or heard you had to become one?

It took practice and faking at first! A LOT! my friends didn't know watsup with my new posture, my new smile, my new voice tone and pace, why i wouldn't participate in noisy sport arguments, where i got confidence to approach without expectations. They hated the new me. I understood, and thought to myself.....F*ck it, there is a price to pay!

I DID LOTS OF TRIAL AND ERRORS. I broke-up with my prettiest g.f at the time, i confronted my "most-highly-feared" mother many times, i spoke my mind to girls, i approached ridiculously, i neg-hit and c.f people, my posture spells "i'm boss", i ditched a lot of friends that were messing my status and reputation up, i went for a rugged-edgy look, i spent on clothes well. 8 months later, i'm the center of attraction guy [and i talk so little]. NO KIDDING!

So many times it became tiring, and i was called "arrogant", "proud", "rude", "nonchalant" a lot, that it doesn't even bother me at all because i understand how they feel. All i know is people copy me a lot now..

Listen, if these books say have self respect, hit the gym, develop a better than average sense of humor and blah blah..... I think you should, not because all this is for a woman.... its because these are things you NEED to move up the social ladder....

Lets not confuse newbies in the game... You have to kinda fake at first. People would hate you, people would challenge you, people would even be confused and surprised. The more of a chump you were prior to your new self, the more of these tests you would face and that's the HARDEST PART.

Only YOU knows what you are gunning for, you have to be ready for all this tests, especially from MEN. You don't just read "Be an alpha male or become high status" and simply become it tomorrow, HELL NO!

I had read lots of PU stuff and dating books prior to sosuave. And yes, they contain a lot of BS. But if at all you're gonna try and fail, FAIL NOW [we don't live forever]. Try things, be open to new ideas [put the least expectations and analysis on them] and remember that almost all DJs have gone or are going through the same process so there's absolutely NO SHAME.

Moral: JUST KEEP IMPROVING, READ AS MUCH OF STUFFS. MORE IMPORTANTLY, PRACTICE!!! MEANWHILE, GET MONEY. I AM NOT A FAN OF A BROKE FELLOW! STUDY IN SCHOOL OR HUSTLE! 'CAUSE YOUR KIDS NEED TO ATTEND THE BEST OF SCHOOLS STRESS-FREE. [these girls are short term! but you still need skills to manage them like a man should alongside with his various passions of life.]

 

[wilford]

I love pu$$y but i don't need it....

I will make an effort to get it, but i won't tolerate bullshiat.

 

[ilikecharlene]

PUA is an 80\20 principle.

20 percent is good, such as being confident/assured, dressing well, etc.

80 percent is just pseudo-psychological bull****. And telling guys that looks don't matter (lol.. well they don't matter absolutely, but they're still a major factor).

IMO, it's largely a fad, and will die down once the gloss has gone. That's why there is the proliferation of PUA guys on Youtube.

 

[IShotTheSheriff]

PUA is an 80\20 principle.

20 percent is good, such as being confident/assured, dressing well, etc.

80 percent is just pseudo-psychological bull****. And telling guys that looks don't matter (lol.. well they don't matter absolutely, but they're still a major factor).

IMO, it's largely a fad, and will die down once the gloss has gone. That's why there is the proliferation of PUA guys on Youtube.

Yes but dont get me wrong.
On youtube in particular there are some guys which kepp it simple and offer ver very practical tipps for situations which you will find yourself in on a regular basis with woman. The guys of practical happyness or whatever he ist called. Not blabla routine bull**** or stuff just straight forward - "if a monan never calls you but only sneds you SMS just write her "call me"."
ANd he is one of the good guys.

 

[MisterD]

There are some tips that are good. But i've said in many a thread. Natural game is the key. If you have natural confidence, most of the battle is won. You don't have to gain it from women. I gained most of mine from getting in better shape, and not caring about outcomes. It's amazing how attracted people are to you when you show indifference. Almost like they feel they want to be the one to make you happy or spark a reaction out of you.

I don't walk into a room with hot chicks and think oh man what are those pua tips again? Ahhh how do i approach?? What if they turn me down? I just walk in and treat them like i would a dude. I acknowledge the fact that they're hot, but so what? We're all human beings. Looks don't intimidate me or impress me. I appreciate a hot face and a fat ass but I'm not gonna break a sweat trying to chase it. And i guess they see that, and they're drawn to it. I live with the belief that hot women are always gonna be around. If I don't get this particular girl, i'll get another. There's not some hot girl shortage going on in the world.

 

[st_99]

The main point is to care without caring.

In other words, sure, its ok to learn tips and tricks, how to push a girls buttons, what makes her vag tingle, stuff like that BUT its an absolute must that you have to put yourself above any girl. Mentally, emotionally, etc.. you just can't give a sh*t about any particular outcome. Thats ultra game in a nutshell.

How do you get to not caring? You need to get your self worth some other way,
whether its career, school goals (phd, mba) hobby, sport, friends, whatever.. find something that is not women. The more
stuff the better.

Basically what MisterD said.

 

[ilikecharlene]

There are some tips that are good. But i've said in many a thread. Natural game is the key. If you have natural confidence, most of the battle is won. You don't have to gain it from women. I gained most of mine from getting in better shape, and not caring about outcomes. It's amazing how attracted people are to you when you show indifference. Almost like they feel they want to be the one to make you happy or spark a reaction out of you.

I don't walk into a room with hot chicks and think oh man what are those pua tips again? Ahhh how do i approach?? What if they turn me down? I just walk in and treat them like i would a dude. I acknowledge the fact that they're hot, but so what? We're all human beings. Looks don't intimidate me or impress me. I appreciate a hot face and a fat ass but I'm not gonna break a sweat trying to chase it. And i guess they see that, and they're drawn to it. I live with the belief that hot women are always gonna be around. If I don't get this particular girl, i'll get another. There's not some hot girl shortage going on in the world.

This. Too many guys fret over looks, as if hot girls' poo smell of strawberries, or if they get a cut they bleed red wine.