Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Do I need professional help?

Canadian Catnip

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I have been worrying about myself over the last week. Feelings and things have been coming to the surface and I seem to be in this mood where I hate myself.

Whenever I get needy and AFC I really hate myself. I can't seem to go out and meet other people or anything else motivating. I just sit around and beat myself up with my internal voice. I keep away from people, even my friends because I believe they don't want to be around me.

Is this normal or do I have serious mental problems? Has anyone else had this problem? If so, what should I do?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Obsidian

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Pook is the greatest professional of all.

Seriously, tho, if you've just been having a rough week, why don't you just drink some beers or go for a 15 minute run until you start feeling better? Overall, your description of your problem is a bit vague for any detailed advice, but I'd say if it's just been going on for a week, try to snap out of it. Make yourself get active doing something that puts you in a good mood (friends, exercise, music, drinking, seeing a funny movie, etc.)
 

reset

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Interceptor, this has worked for you?

I have seen that same site recommended before, and looked at it... but it seemed a little left-field, and also not something you can really do yourself.

(BTW when I saw that link in your post, I thought "emo free"... like not being one of those emo dudes who is always whining about girls while pretending to be an alternative rocker... guess that's where my head's at ):crazy:
 

Max Power

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Okay Catnip, I've read all the posts you've made before offering you advice.

1. You're taking this DJ thing way too seriously and it's no longer fun for you.
2. Even though you're doing ****y funny and all the tricks you're not getting the results you want.
3. I have a feeling that you still have inner game issues that you need to work on before you can go in the field. You can have all the DJ knowledge in the world, but if it's not congruent with your inner self women can smell it a mile away and turn it on you. And after reading all of your posts I don't think you are emotionally ready or have the inner confidence to deal with the HBs you are seeking yet.
4. You have stated that you are overweight and you are working on it, yet I have not seen any posts from you in the health forums. Are you working out? Do you go to the gym? Do you do cardio?

My advice.

You need to take 3 months off from this "job"

Try to lose some weight by exercising and get your head straight. And don't come back here (unless it's the fitnes forums) or go into the field until then.

You are not crazy, you're just frustrated -- the F part of AFC.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Interceptor

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reset

Master Don Juan
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Thanks for the links, I'll check 'em out.
 

lyamdb

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Everyone can use some sort of psychotherapy believe me. it starts a process of self awareness in you which will help you in the long run. So, if you can afford the money, do yourself a favor and go see a therapist for a while. This doesn't mean you got serious problems. Everyone needs it.
 

Soyoushave

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lyamdb said:
Everyone can use some sort of psychotherapy believe me. it starts a process of self awareness in you which will help you in the long run. So, if you can afford the money, do yourself a favor and go see a therapist for a while. This doesn't mean you got serious problems. Everyone needs it.
100% true,
though I haven't been to a therapist myself, I have been very busy reading (self)psychology books and surfing the internet about it.
Selfawareness is super great...I have to admit that there are still problems in my life, but I can cope with them now, and I'm enjoying even the smallest things in life.

Last week I went back home after a fight (words only;) not physical fighting) and while cycling back to my home, I just looked around me, seeing nature etc. Yeah, it sounds really stupid if you haven't experienced this style of living, but it really does feel great:)

Never let anger etc. win on you, just make a list of all negative emotions and a (recent) situation you had that emotion in...now think of something positive that situation brought you...

For instance:

my girlfriend broke up --> sadness

Thanks to her breaking up, I did an active search on the things I did wrong in that relationship...taking it with me to the future.

Life isn't a road of perils you have to walk untill you die at the end of it...
It's a great party, and parties are places where you should have fun, so why not have fun in life:D

Go outside, and just check out your environment...if you're good to people, they will return the favor so to speak...and if they answer agitated ..it only means they don't know how to enjoy life...it's not your fault!!:cool:
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

On Point

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I think therapy can be real helpful if you find someone good who can give you a different perspective on your thinking. In my early twenties I went for a while and it was helpful. Eventually I got to a point where I felt like I was just paying someone to listen to me talk, and that's when I knew I was done.
 

nolocus

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Canadian Catnip said:
I have been worrying about myself over the last week. Feelings and things have been coming to the surface and I seem to be in this mood where I hate myself.

Whenever I get needy and AFC I really hate myself. I can't seem to go out and meet other people or anything else motivating. I just sit around and beat myself up with my internal voice. I keep away from people, even my friends because I believe they don't want to be around me.

Is this normal or do I have serious mental problems? Has anyone else had this problem? If so, what should I do?
Most people go through rough times every now and again...If your depression sticks around for more than a couple weeks it would probably be benefical to seek a therapist. Just talking about your problems with someone else can be quite healing.

Try to not dwell on negative thoughts...acknowledge them but do your best to focus on the positive.
 
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