Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

Do I daman my money back?

Pathological

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 16, 2019
Messages
59
Reaction score
10
Age
28
Sorry if this was asked here before (to be honest I am more of an immage board guy) but here it goes:

Dated this girl for almost a year, turned into an LDR (which I, knowing was a bad idea, still wanted to believe in). Basically everything was going fine and all, I had to support with the tickets and all but it seemed natural to me. We made plans to go to the south for a 3 week holliday. I did my part.

Then all of a sudden she practically ghosts me for a week and almost a week later tells me on the phone that she "just only" made out with a guy after smoking weed and breaks up since she can not settle yet, acts apollogetic. I have not talked or contacted her since.

Fast foreward to now, I am on the trip alone. Working out every day as hard as I can to somehow subdue the rage. But otherwise basically living like a NEET without much contact with anyone since all I feel is constant anger.

When and how the fvck do I demand the money for the tickets back? Worst problem would be her unability to pay since she's from Eastern Europe and has chit to no income. But to be honest I do not care how she gets the cash.

Or is it too harsh?
 

Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
17,021
Reaction score
5,605
Age
48
Location
midwestern cow field 40
The elements of a gift are offer, acceptance, and donative intent. The tickets were a gift. You have no recourse, nor will you ever get that money back. Sorry man, chalk it up to a lesson learned and be wiser next time.
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,126
Reaction score
3,659
Age
31
Location
Sweden
1. You can't make her pay you back.

2. Distance does not make the heart grow fonder, distance makes the eyes wander.

3. I've fvcked up in a similar way - traveling to see a woman. She did a 180 as soon as I texted that I'd landed, before we'd met. I also knew it was a bad idea but I did it anyway because like you I wanted it to work. My lesson, and my advice to you, is to not give power to someone else to decide how your investments of time and money are going to go.
 

Pathological

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 16, 2019
Messages
59
Reaction score
10
Age
28
The elements of a gift are offer, acceptance, and donative intent. The tickets were a gift. You have no recourse, nor will you ever get that money back. Sorry man, chalk it up to a lesson learned and be wiser next time.
Lesson learned.
One more question: how to stop making it hurt so much?
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,126
Reaction score
3,659
Age
31
Location
Sweden
One more question: how to stop making it hurt so much?
Accept the fact, feel the feeling, forgive yourself, take a lesson away, move on to other women and other things.
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,126
Reaction score
3,659
Age
31
Location
Sweden
I sure time will help. The anger just doesn't subside either
As long as you are on the trip and have nothing else going on there, you will feel anger... and this is a symptom of the lesson I told you about above. If you had gone on the trip for yourself first, other women you meet there or have already talked to second, and expecting a disney resolution with her specifically third, you wouldn't be feeling this anger.

Talk to other women now while you're there... just cut loose your inhibitions about it and let it go while you're on the trip. Fvck it.
 

Pathological

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 16, 2019
Messages
59
Reaction score
10
Age
28
As long as you are on the trip and have nothing else going on there, you will feel anger... and this is a symptom of the lesson I told you about above. If you had gone on the trip for yourself first, other women you meet there or have already talked to second, and expecting a disney resolution with her specifically third, you wouldn't be feeling this anger.

Talk to other women now while you're there... just cut loose your inhibitions about it and let it go while you're on the trip. Fvck it.
It is boomer central here. Nothing but boomer families and locals (which I am not into). In one week my boomer-tier parents will arrive since "the living space is free anyways".
All I do is try to focus on working out as much as I can and chugging vodka to loosen up would counter that. Frankly, I am at least content to finally vent here...
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,126
Reaction score
3,659
Age
31
Location
Sweden
Chugging vodka? no way dude. I don't drink at all. But yeah, if you can't talk to any other girls there and you've got nothing to do... it¨s gonna suck until you get out of there and can put yourself on something else. I've been there dude. Vent all you need... just remember to take the lesson I gave away.
 

Pathological

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 16, 2019
Messages
59
Reaction score
10
Age
28
I wanted to just get wasted on some beach rhe other day by myself but everyone being happy just made me sick and reminded me to go back to the weights.
Maybe I am wrong but the "never stop performing" part of being a man put everithing in perspective of having to just work towards status, money, body as the end all be all.
 

Pathological

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 16, 2019
Messages
59
Reaction score
10
Age
28
Chugging vodka? no way dude. I don't drink at all. But yeah, if you can't talk to any other girls there and you've got nothing to do... it¨s gonna suck until you get out of there and can put yourself on something else. I've been there dude. Vent all you need... just remember to take the lesson I gave away.
I wish I could be that cool headed. I only ever feel relaxed after a drink or two.
 

Pathological

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 16, 2019
Messages
59
Reaction score
10
Age
28
Not being with or around women is not a problem or an issue to me. It's the backstab that hurts the most. No ammount of effort is ever worth it it seems. And the way things are going joining some paramillitary organization would be more fun than some desk job or phony startup venture
 

Bible_Belt

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 27, 2005
Messages
17,021
Reaction score
5,605
Age
48
Location
midwestern cow field 40
just work towards status, money, body as the end all be all.
Your body isn't just muscles, it also includes your mind. LMS isn't worth much if your mind isn't right. "Inner game" is the old pua term. If you're not happy with life, then it is hard for people, and women, to gravitate to you.
 

AttackFormation

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 2, 2014
Messages
4,126
Reaction score
3,659
Age
31
Location
Sweden
I wanted to just get wasted on some beach rhe other day by myself but everyone being happy just made me sick and reminded me to go back to the weights.
Maybe I am wrong but the "never stop performing" part of being a man put everithing in perspective of having to just work towards status, money, body as the end all be all.
Ive got good news for you... This is something you only realize and start feeling from a retrospect on, but at some point, your energy tank for being a circus animal who has to be, do, feel and think certain things to qualify itself for random women (and internet alphas) who themselves dont have to do shyt, just runs out. Your nervous system simply wont let you put up with any more shyt that you are tired of or dont enjoy. You didnt know you could get so tired of shyt that it causes a physiological change in you, but there it is.

At that point you will begin to actualize the motto of putting your own enjoyment and selfrespect first in your lifestyle and microchoices. You are 24, so you may be close to hitting this point. Youll know it because youll feel it.
 
Last edited:

Pathological

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 16, 2019
Messages
59
Reaction score
10
Age
28
Your body isn't just muscles, it also includes your mind. LMS isn't worth much if your mind isn't right. "Inner game" is the old pua term. If you're not happy with life, then it is hard for people, and women, to gravitate to you.
To be "happy with life" would probably make me do some very big things that I am sure I would not be allowed to even remotely reach
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
15,859
Reaction score
8,562
Don't be too bitter, LDRs rarely work.
 
Top