"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Do any of you wish you could have a certain ex back?

EyeOnThePrize

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What you miss isn't the real them, it's an idealistic version of them that you have in your head. If the ideal was true you would be together.

Remember to think in degrees, not absolutes, no one's perfect. And pining for someone is rooted in lack, and is a symptom of something deeper. Take it as a sign to double down on your personal goals.

Giving and sharing your life shouldn't feel like a huge sacrifice, whether the woman stays or goes, by your hand or hers. It should all feel like second nature.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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lost_blackbird

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No, none of them have ever really gone out of their way to make me feel special as far as I can tell.
 

Billtx49

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Wanting an ex back is probably one of the most self-destructive mindsets a guy can have. You can't go back in time, literally. You can only dream about it.
Exactly. Everyone rationally realizes that the past is now gone and can’t be changed, but when emotions are involved concerning our favorite female, it’s Now a different story,
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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mrgoodstuff

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Exactly. Everyone rationally realizes that the past is now gone and can’t be changed, but when emotions are involved concerning our favorite female, it’s Now a different story,
Past is gone you convince yourself that the future can be different.
 

captain55

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I found out that my Ex went on SSRIs (anti-depressants) after we broke up. It's the equivalent of having a chemical lobotomy. If I got back with her then it would be getting back with a robot, and not the girl I once knew.
Robot? Lol that’s an understatement. Last girl I dated was on those and I would highly caution men to stay away from any woman on them. I’ve been around the block..I’ve dated strippers,npd,bpd, you name it.... How quickly she became cold was something I’ve never witnessed in my entire life even from the harshest borderlines. The woman literally went from wanting my child to acting like I was a stranger in a matter of days. Truly disturbing..

They may be good people I’m sure but I just wouldn’t chose to connect intimately with a person on anti depressants. You just can’t get that connection with them
 

Mister_Skinny_Jeanz

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Ive spinned a million plates so I know all about how not to get stuck up on one woman but do any of you think about a certain ex of yours that you wish you shouldve kept or that you would love to be with right now? Its been 10 years and I cant stop thinking about one of my exes.
you need to get out more , and see more yoga pants, go to your local target or walmart for a few hours and then come back here
 

Jariel

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There are two in particular I really miss to this day and I often wish we could reconnect. But then I realise what I actually miss is the honeymoon period of that relationship. Whereas the final months were miserable and stressful. Even if we recaptured some of that early excitement, it would eventually fall apart again because we weren't compatible in the long term.
 

Grneyedguy

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I had an affair six years ago. It was supposed to be non-emotional but I got carried away...fooled around and fell in love. For my part it was wonderful. It might have worked out as there were strong feelings between us but of course I did everything wrong. I wish I could get a mulligan, a do over. I m sure it would turn out the same but at least I'd know I did everything right.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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DSterlen

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Nope, not one. They all either got fat, got a bunch of giant ugly tattoos, turned into a weirdo or a leftist/feminist nutjob. Good riddens. Also, every single one of the girls I've ever had ONEITIS for pretty much the same thing happened. I wouldn't touch any of them now. I sleep well in this respect.
 

christie

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No, it is my belief that he is a father now with children out of wedlock like how his brother became a father.
I predict he is still being told how to live his life by his mother and a married, promiscuous woman.
I believe he is satisfied and happy and content with this position and don't wish to disturb him or interrupt his life. I have no amends to make to him that I hadn't already made in the last bit of time I was still an 'us' with him.

I am content and grateful and find comfort in some positive memories of companionship and intimacy and appreciate he has kept no contact and not stalked me in my area.
 

Grinderman

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All ex's need to swim with the fishes (metaphorically speaking of course).

Ask yourself how you can afford to sacrifice your precious present moment headspace for.......

..for what? A fvcking self delusional fantasy which will render you with a present moment thousand yard stare.

Wake up to today.
 
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