"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Dmatter's New Life Resolutions Journal

dmatter

Don Juan
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Hey guys, I have been here for almost five years now under different names. and honestly this site has changed my life. It has helped me from becoming a loser and has left me somewhere in between a AFC and a DJ. I know most of the techniques and have read most of the inspiring posts. When put into practice I have had success. but my my inconsistent confidence tends to get in the way like yest this hot 25 year old was eye raping me she would not stop looking at me on the bus and honestly at that moment i got scared and did not know what to do cause she was that hot. and when i get off the bus i realize i should have said "you know its rude to stare right" :) ugh. but Im working on it.

anyways i have just come my longest relationship being about 3 months and I knew she kept hinting signs of low interest so I took the initiative and broke up with her but immediatley pleaded to go back with her AFC she thought about it 5 days later i could have gotten back together but something within me said no and then a week later i get feelings for her and confess my pain without her. (looking back at it i regret it so so much) and she then 2 days ago tels me that being friends is whats best for us.

honestly guys i dont really care the only reason i "loved" her was because she was my only option and most of my exes were by luck. So as long as i work on my goals I KNOW i can become the Don Juan I was meant to be. I basically erased her from my life with one or two weak moments where i add her on aim again and check her away message.

I am not bad looking either I get looks all the time but I just freeze up and not approach, opening is one of my weakpoints along with confidence.

I know that knowing is not enough i must apply as well. and i hope with guys like kontroller and many others i can get the help i need to become the MAN that Im destined to be.

So here we go. seeing as new years is 2 months from now i have decided to make my resolutions NOW so when new years come i will have already had a good amount of progress and start the new year on better terms.

My weaknesses are
Opening
genuiney consistent confidence
long term social life

strenghts
humour
good looks (lol wel im not deformed)
height 5 10 or 5 11 with shoes
smile
eye contact

Things that are so so but need work
conversations
keeping social proof ( ill be cool with a guy or girl one day and the next week he or she will walk pass me)
lacking charisma
lacking charm
not and alpha leader all the times.
my eye contact I look down when a grl 1st looks at me i cant help it its a reflex.



My resolutions
Gain 10 lbs of muscle and 8 % bf
have a large group of friends
never stay home on weekends
always have something to do
have a closer realationship with my parents
have alot of SEXXXX
have many plates spinning
eventually go into a ltr
a social life being "that guy" everyone wants to hit up
buy a new phone the G1 from tmobile
pass all my classes
gets some hobbies like guitar and piano maybe breakdance
get wayy better at dancing
get a car
Did I mention sexx?
not masturbate ever.
get better at speakg spanish
increase vocabulary.
ill think of more..



Also I will report any approaches i do and log results once or twice a week. I look foward to your support and advice and I hope more of you get inspired to do a journal like this so we can annhilate the afc disease once and for all.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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dmatter

Don Juan
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okay so my main concern right now is keeping girls interest at a high level. I always give a strong impression funny confident gain rapport and get number from there sometimes the girls interest level isnt as high as it was when i met them? wtf. also when talking in a group and I say something usually im not heard or its brushed off and other times ill be the leader of the group how do i deal with the inconsistency?
 

dmatter

Don Juan
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so so day. didnt get really anything done but Im working on it. just been really tired due to work and school. when i get home i just knock out. anyways im going to sleep reall early today so tom is gonna be fun and interesting cause i might go to a club.
 

magickarl

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 19, 2008
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Illinois
It's good to hear that you are setting resolutions.

I've just got to ask you why it's taken 5 years to realize what you want and decide to go after it. Better late than never, though.

If I could offer once piece of advice that I feel would help you more than anything else it is this: You have got to get out there and grab the bull by it's horns. As much reading and researching and thinking as you do, none of it is going to help you as much as going out in the field and learning by trial and error. Practice may never make perfect, but it can bring you damned close.

Also, it is just as important that you stay happy in life all things about women aside. From some of your goals, it looks to me like you already realize that, and I am happy that it is a priority of yours to get into shape.

I'm actually getting ready to leave for a party right now, but I want you to know I'll be keeping an eye on this thread, and if there is any advice you need, I'll do my best to help you out. Later man
 

dmatter

Don Juan
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its taken me so long because honestly, Ive always put it off day after day week after week. i would read a sweet article or post from the dj bible and remember being soo inspired so motiviated but then the next day I get held back by fear and the push wasnt there any more. Now 5 years later I have changed but mentally. I KNOW I can have the life I want if I work at it. I also regret that my highschool life could have been soo much better and fulfilling had I kept that push to study to talk to that girl tryout for teams.. but i didnt. the truth is it wasnt till i broke up with my ex that I realized how miserable I really am even when I was with her she was cute and all but was chubby and I didnt want to introduceher to any of my friends. I want to eventually have a gf with a banging body face and personality, I just Thank God that I still have some time to turn my life around for the better at the age of 19.

thanks magickarl its greatly appreciated that your willing to help.and any one else who wants to share their insight well Im going to sleep now, cant wait for tom. i finally feel a little push that is growing each day.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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