Quiksilver
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 30, 2006
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"...There is a train leaving the station, would you rather take action and jump on that train even though it is picking up speed and there is a risk of falling under it? Or....would you rather play it safe and miss that train, not know when another will come along, if ever..."
Part of why many people don't go for an opportunity is obviously fear. We(yes sometimes me included) rationalize that fear by telling ourselves that another opportunity(train) will come along soon, and we will be ready for that one. Then another opportunity comes(because we are ALL lucky and God is a merciful S.O.B.)...and goes...and we get stuck in a viscious cycle of dealing with our fear THE WRONG WAY. In this analogy, to deal with your fear the right way you have to be willing to die, willing to FAIL.
Eventually you get so fed up with watching all of your fellow companions make that leap onto the moving train and take their chance, that you decide its YOUR time, that all of YOUR failures to act have lead to this ONE moment, this ONE turn of fate. And you take that leap, not knowing if you will make it or not, but you sure as hell know that if you are successful you will be one happy motherfvcker! I will not say whether he survived that jump or got his @ss chewed up by that train because that is not the point.
The point is that the first step is the hardest.
The point is the fear that was BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION by your imagination and analyzation will be popped like a balloon. From then on you will know that the rewards of taking those steps toward success are NOT that hard and that even a complete and utter failed leap will NOT be as bad as you had first made it out to be.
I've read some threads on how to get rid of your fear of rejection. People are told to go up to a 10 000+ women and slowly break down that fear of rejection. This is ok advice...isn't it? Sure, why not...
I had an epiphany not too long ago. Just before it, I was sky-diving. I'll tell you what, I've never felt more afraid than I did up at 15 000ft being told to let go of the wire and jump. For the first 20 minutes of the flight my imagination went berserk and had concocted all of these horrible and painful occurances for me if I jumped. Seeing all of my friends leaping out with a big grin on their faces really pained me; I WAS BEING LEFT BEHIND! My heart was clawing at my throat...I felt really bad...Then I felt ANGRY, angry at myself for being such a fvcking pvssy. Suddely I made up my mind and just said "FVCK IT!" and leapt. It was the most fun I've had, EVER.
That evening I went to the bar with the same friends I went skydiving with, they were joking about whether it was a good place to meet HBs and teasting eachother(and me) the rejections they might recieve. These guys are GOOD. Within 10 minutes they are havin a convo with random girls they spotted, meanwhile mr. chump(me) sitting at the original table we got, was eating. I felt that same feeling at that moment that I did while up at 15000 ft earlier that day when my friends were having fun while I was scared
sh1tless...Then I felt the same anger, the same rage. In my mind I again said "FVCK IT" and went to talk to a girl who I'd been making some eye contact with while eating...I won't tell you how it went because that ISNT THE POINT! I MIGHT HAVE GOTTEN REJECTED, I MIGHT HAVE GOTTEN LAID, IT DOESN'T MATTER!
Readers: "Ok, thats nice... you went skydiving and had a beer afterwards, whats in it for me??"
My advice is to do 'something' that forces you to conquer your fear. My 'something' was skydiving(the $300 also motivates you to jump as well). Once you get over your fear once, every time thereafter will be easier.
P.S. Skydiving is great for conquering your fear, because the exhiliration when you are free-falling trains your brain that once it overcomes this fear, good things follow it. ie. when you're workin up the courage to make an approach, and you finish dominating your fear the same way you did for skydiving, your brain will then be conditioned to feel exhilirated and on a natural high as you go into the conversation. Also it will give you a good story to tell and the chicks dig that sort of risky sh1t!
SO GET YOUR SEXY ASS OUT THERE AND JUMP ON YOUR MOTHERFVCKING TRAIN!!1!
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