DonJuanabe
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 20, 2012
- Messages
- 592
- Reaction score
- 22
Fall will soon be here and it's time for DJB to reflect on himself as the seasons have passed by this year. No serious girlfriend since March 2010 when his seven year LTR ended (mutually). Prior to splitting up, his then GF said DJB would never date another girl as pretty as her, but DJB didn't care - the relationship just wasn't working. In May of 2010 DJB met a girl via online dating - she was very intelligent (genius level) and a solid 7.5 with 8 body - but it was like talking to a stone wall. No emotion of any kind; it was... weird. So, DJB let it go as non-interest.
Random dates for the rest of the year and then he meets a girl in December. She isn't really his type but she'll do, she's cute enough and intelligent, and they date for about a month. She sees his run-down apartment for the first time and the next day cancels their upcoming New Year's plans and doesn't want to continue dating. He accepts it with grace since he wasn't really into her that much anyway. With most of his friends married or in relationships DJB decides to spend New Years at home, chilling, just reflecting on another year gone.
2011 comes and goes; no significant dating relationships. Again, DJB spends New Years at home, chilling, all of his friends spending the evening with their spouse/GF. He could have dated a co-worker as she made that very obvious, but he did not want to go down that potential route of disaster in the making. As you can imagine, DJB is frustrated, and has to give props to his ex-GF -- she was certainly right that he'd never date a girl as pretty as her. He decides that from now on he will always go for the kiss-close on a date.
Early in the morning of January 1, 2012 he sees an online profile and sends an email to the girl. They banter back and forth for a week or so and DJB likes this girl. She has just finalized a divorce, so he is wary, but she is very pretty, very athletic, and extremely intelligent (genius level). They are supposed to meet but she pushes the date back. He senses something has changed -- he can feel it. She tells him she met someone and wants to see where it will go but will still meet him since the date was already scheduled. They meet for pho, have a great time with lots of laughing and banter. Standing at her car he kisses her, she lets him but does not kiss back.
DJB, who had been off SoSuave since maybe 2002, rejoins. He is at his limit and let down. This is the girl he discusses upon rejoining, the one who liked cycling, was pretty, was smart. Regardless of women, he is happy to have met/re-met some great guys on the forum.
In late January DJB meets another girl. Their first date last for hours and is fun. DJB does not go for the kiss close because as they are chatting by her car he says we should do this again and the girl declines (don't remember what she said but it was a weird response). DJBe thinks okay, one and done. The next day he receives an email and the girl says she misheard him and it just occurred to her that he was suggesting a second date, which she would love to do. So they go for Vietnamese food and he goes for the kiss close at the end, and it is a long kiss. Third date they go to a movie but as they are driving she is texting a friend in California who has been having relationship problems. Weird. Back at her place DJB and the girl f*ck and he sleeps over. The next day she emails DJB that she is sorry to do this but she is getting back together with her boyfriend -- that's who she had been texting.
Lonely. At this point DJB is lonely. Friends out with their wives or girlfriends most of the time; DJB doing nothing. People will often tell him he should have married his LTR because she was hot, but he knows it would have been the wrong decision; being lonely is better than being divorced and lonely.
In March, via online dating, he stumbles across a profile he remembers from nearly two years ago, back in May 2010 (see above). He contacts her saying hi, recalling how she wasn't interested but that he liked her profile and thought she was interesting. She replies that she doesn't recall the date well and that many people tell her she is hard to read because it takes her a while to figure out how she feels about things. She also says she has serious emotional issues (clinical; in therapy). They exchange fun emails and she suggests meeting that weekend. They do and have a really good time -- she is much more interactive than she was two years ago. They spend six hours together at a festival, then dinner, then chatting in her car. He kiss closes and she tells him to take off his glasses (he does so and talks about various things not realizing she is requesting a deeper, more passionate makeout session). No matter, the date was really good.
She emails him the next day hoping the rest of his weekend was good. They set up plans to hang out again. DJB figures be casual and go slow not realizing she wants their second date to be a full-blown romantic date, and due to miscommunication it's a bit of a clusterf*ck but still ends with a makeout session.
DJB doesn't realize that after their second date a guy who is into self-help psychotherapy will, by sheer dumb/bad luck, come into her life and infatuate her with his NLP stuff, ultimately pulling her away from him and causing their relationship to devolve. He has some warning signs that something is going on because she mentions a new friend and things he has been saying about developing your neural pathways, and despite knowing a bit about neuropsychology/physiology/biology he intentionally decides not to talk about this stuff with the girl because he does not want to become enmeshed in anything relating to her therapy (she sees a therapist once/week and has been for years).
Yes, this is Oneitis, the girl DJB complained about for months on SoSuave. Funny how he actually knew her from two years ago. She certainly made progress in her therapy, but he is angry about the unknown and unexpected ****blocking he received when he thought he totally had the girl in his hands. He had no doubts at all! And he regrets not taking time to talk about neurologic hypertrophy and related concepts with her given how infatuated she was with it.
As summer rolls in DJB gets back to meeting girls, despite always thinking about Oneitis. In August he has two opportunities for relationships but decides he isn't interested in even spinning them. One is married/poly and will be an issue with him actually developing a serious long term relationship; the other girl just doesn't have her sh*t together financially.
September seems to have started well: one date down that seemed to go well which he kiss closed and will ask out on a second date (update to follow); another date later this week with a girl who is into cycling like DJB (update to follow); another date scheduled for later in September due to travel issues (update to follow). So, DJB is stoked for the time being and might even have some plates to spin (though he would prefer a committed GF). However, given his history and the bizarre sh*t that seems to happen repeatedly, he is keeping a very open mind.
The one thing DJB hopes for is to not be surfing SoSuave on December 31, 2012 at midnight...
Random dates for the rest of the year and then he meets a girl in December. She isn't really his type but she'll do, she's cute enough and intelligent, and they date for about a month. She sees his run-down apartment for the first time and the next day cancels their upcoming New Year's plans and doesn't want to continue dating. He accepts it with grace since he wasn't really into her that much anyway. With most of his friends married or in relationships DJB decides to spend New Years at home, chilling, just reflecting on another year gone.
2011 comes and goes; no significant dating relationships. Again, DJB spends New Years at home, chilling, all of his friends spending the evening with their spouse/GF. He could have dated a co-worker as she made that very obvious, but he did not want to go down that potential route of disaster in the making. As you can imagine, DJB is frustrated, and has to give props to his ex-GF -- she was certainly right that he'd never date a girl as pretty as her. He decides that from now on he will always go for the kiss-close on a date.
Early in the morning of January 1, 2012 he sees an online profile and sends an email to the girl. They banter back and forth for a week or so and DJB likes this girl. She has just finalized a divorce, so he is wary, but she is very pretty, very athletic, and extremely intelligent (genius level). They are supposed to meet but she pushes the date back. He senses something has changed -- he can feel it. She tells him she met someone and wants to see where it will go but will still meet him since the date was already scheduled. They meet for pho, have a great time with lots of laughing and banter. Standing at her car he kisses her, she lets him but does not kiss back.
DJB, who had been off SoSuave since maybe 2002, rejoins. He is at his limit and let down. This is the girl he discusses upon rejoining, the one who liked cycling, was pretty, was smart. Regardless of women, he is happy to have met/re-met some great guys on the forum.
In late January DJB meets another girl. Their first date last for hours and is fun. DJB does not go for the kiss close because as they are chatting by her car he says we should do this again and the girl declines (don't remember what she said but it was a weird response). DJBe thinks okay, one and done. The next day he receives an email and the girl says she misheard him and it just occurred to her that he was suggesting a second date, which she would love to do. So they go for Vietnamese food and he goes for the kiss close at the end, and it is a long kiss. Third date they go to a movie but as they are driving she is texting a friend in California who has been having relationship problems. Weird. Back at her place DJB and the girl f*ck and he sleeps over. The next day she emails DJB that she is sorry to do this but she is getting back together with her boyfriend -- that's who she had been texting.
Lonely. At this point DJB is lonely. Friends out with their wives or girlfriends most of the time; DJB doing nothing. People will often tell him he should have married his LTR because she was hot, but he knows it would have been the wrong decision; being lonely is better than being divorced and lonely.
In March, via online dating, he stumbles across a profile he remembers from nearly two years ago, back in May 2010 (see above). He contacts her saying hi, recalling how she wasn't interested but that he liked her profile and thought she was interesting. She replies that she doesn't recall the date well and that many people tell her she is hard to read because it takes her a while to figure out how she feels about things. She also says she has serious emotional issues (clinical; in therapy). They exchange fun emails and she suggests meeting that weekend. They do and have a really good time -- she is much more interactive than she was two years ago. They spend six hours together at a festival, then dinner, then chatting in her car. He kiss closes and she tells him to take off his glasses (he does so and talks about various things not realizing she is requesting a deeper, more passionate makeout session). No matter, the date was really good.
She emails him the next day hoping the rest of his weekend was good. They set up plans to hang out again. DJB figures be casual and go slow not realizing she wants their second date to be a full-blown romantic date, and due to miscommunication it's a bit of a clusterf*ck but still ends with a makeout session.
DJB doesn't realize that after their second date a guy who is into self-help psychotherapy will, by sheer dumb/bad luck, come into her life and infatuate her with his NLP stuff, ultimately pulling her away from him and causing their relationship to devolve. He has some warning signs that something is going on because she mentions a new friend and things he has been saying about developing your neural pathways, and despite knowing a bit about neuropsychology/physiology/biology he intentionally decides not to talk about this stuff with the girl because he does not want to become enmeshed in anything relating to her therapy (she sees a therapist once/week and has been for years).
Yes, this is Oneitis, the girl DJB complained about for months on SoSuave. Funny how he actually knew her from two years ago. She certainly made progress in her therapy, but he is angry about the unknown and unexpected ****blocking he received when he thought he totally had the girl in his hands. He had no doubts at all! And he regrets not taking time to talk about neurologic hypertrophy and related concepts with her given how infatuated she was with it.
As summer rolls in DJB gets back to meeting girls, despite always thinking about Oneitis. In August he has two opportunities for relationships but decides he isn't interested in even spinning them. One is married/poly and will be an issue with him actually developing a serious long term relationship; the other girl just doesn't have her sh*t together financially.
September seems to have started well: one date down that seemed to go well which he kiss closed and will ask out on a second date (update to follow); another date later this week with a girl who is into cycling like DJB (update to follow); another date scheduled for later in September due to travel issues (update to follow). So, DJB is stoked for the time being and might even have some plates to spin (though he would prefer a committed GF). However, given his history and the bizarre sh*t that seems to happen repeatedly, he is keeping a very open mind.
The one thing DJB hopes for is to not be surfing SoSuave on December 31, 2012 at midnight...
