"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
DJ Sadao
- Thread starter Sadao
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Create Reality
Master Don Juan
Rofl, that's classic man.Create Reality said:
On another note, the one other guy I usually work with, well, his girlfriend came in for like 30min waiting for him to get off. She obviously wears the pants in the relationship so I chatted with her for a bit, taking her off her high horse and I could tell it was turning her on. Right now i'm not afraid to step on toes since I'm moving to AZ in June so I'm free to do as I please. Any tips to get her to go to lunch with me or something? She works right across the plaza but it'd be awkward if she denied me and informed her bf.
I don't know if I would personally do it for I am barely going through my 'transformation'. But I think you should... Try to do it innocent looking way at first to see how she reacts.
Well, that's all the confirmation I needed! Gonna see what I can do this weekend.loco2chon said:F her. I mean F it! You are moving anyways
I don't know if I would personally do it for I am barely going through my 'transformation'. But I think you should... Try to do it innocent looking way at first to see how she reacts.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
It was a major gamble, and I was laughing my ass off from the moment I sent it until she responded. I just kept telling myself that if she took it badly, who the fVck cares, so many more chicks out there.evasive said:
I walk over to her after finishing up a set so it looked like I was just chatting in between sets, and not coming to the gym to hit on girls.
Me: Looook whooo it issss.
HB8counter: Hehe, hey.
Me: Another exciting night here at Total Body Fitness?
HB8counter: ..I'm so bored.
Me: Haha, yea looks like it, so are you going to grad night?
HB8counter: Yea, are you?
Me: Not sure, do you know where it is, or are they trying to keep it a secret.
HB8counter: Secret pretty much heh.
Me: Where'd they go last year, they rented all of Disneyland right?
We talk about 'Grad Night' for a few minutes, nothing special.
HB8counter: Are you going to prom?
Me: I'm not sure, I'm not sure who to ask, are you?
HB8counter: Yea
Me: Who are you going with?
HB8counter: He's a year older, in college.
Me: Ooo, older man eh?
HB8counter: Haha. Yea.
Me: That's cool, I wouldn't want to go alone though, so I probably won't go unless I find a date.
HB8counter: It would still be fun if you went with a group of friends.
Me: Yea, but if they all have dates it would be kind of weird.
HB8counter: Yea, true.
Me: I dunno, I'm sure i'll find someone. I'll figure something out.
Went on to finish my workout.
Me: Cyaaa.
HB8counter: Oh bye, have a good night.
Me: You too.
She seemed a bit warmer tonight, maybe I'm actually getting somewhere with her.
Good Job though... I think you are getting somewhere with this babe... Keep it up you might end up hitting it.
Oh I definitely feel natural most of the time, and confident. A good trick is to smile a lot, it usually gets the girl smiling as well and that means she's enjoying the conversation.loco2chon said:Hmm.... The hard thing about approaching girls, to me, is acting natural, showing it with face expressions, gesture, and body posture. You have to look confident of yourself... I think if I can somehow do this. BOOM!
Good Job though... I think you are getting somewhere with this babe... Keep it up you might end up hitting it.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Feel free to ask any questions.
I was working alone on Sunday since that's the only day that the other fool that has my job isn't working, and we're usually always together. So his girlfriend works in the same shopping center at pick-up-stix, this chinese place. I head over there during one of my many unofficial breaks and before I even get to the door she flings it open and comes jumping out.
Me: Wow, excited to see me?
HB8halfazn: Yeaaa, I saw you coming from inside.
Me: Cool cool, what are you working today?
HB8halfazn: You mean what time?
Me: That's generally what that questions means, yea.
HB8halfazn: 1 to 9, but probably until 9:30.
Me: And when is your lunch.
HB8halfazn: Whenever.
Me: I'm gonna take mine at 4:15 or so, you wanna go to lunch?
HB8halfazn: Sure *smiles and does this little move in excitement*
Me: Ok so I'll be here at about 4:15.
HB8halfazn: Cool cool.
Me: Cya
HB8halfazn: Bye.
I go back to work for an hour, pretty much looking forward to lunch because I can definitely tell that this girl is interested. So I come around at about 4:20, 5min later then scheduled for coolness factor. I ask her friend where she is, and her friend informs me that she got picked up for lunch. This pissed me off since had I known she would ditch out on me, I would have taken my lunch a bit later and not had to walk over there. So I come back about 4 hours later, not coming immediately shows that it wasn't a big deal to me.
Me: So let's hear your really good excuse. *smiling*
HB8halfazn: A good excuse? My best friend from out of town showed up to take me to lunch.
Me: That's a terrible excuse..
HB8halfazn: ..Can we talk outside?
Me: Sure
Feeling kind of surprised and confused, we go and sit at some tables outside.
Me: So what's the deal.
HB8halfazn: Ok, just before lunch Freddy came by and asked what I was going to do for lunch. I said that Sadao came by and asked me to go to lunch with him. He asked me if I was going to go, and I said yes.
Me: Uh oh.
HB8halfazn: He got really angry and started spouting off how you are trying to hook up with everyone in the store, all this ****.
Me: He's full of ****
HB8halfazn: Yea I got really mad at him since I know you're a really nice guy and that what he says isn't true (it's completely true sweetheart).
Me: Yea I'm not like that at all, I'm just new in town and you're one of the only people around here that I know so I figured we could grab lunch together.
The conversation continues for an hour, while on one of my unofficial breaks that I got **** for later. But she started telling me things, telling me not to repeat them to anyone (weird for only meeting her like twice.) But she talks about how she is probably going to leave him, how he's so jealous and she just can't take it anymore. Also talks about how I seem really cool and just so relaxed, while I respond agreeing that I am really awesome. Later on she even tells me how she is a very horny girl, used to be a model, etc. Basically just a very interesting conversation and I think we're going to be seeing a lot of each other fairly soon. Ended with me getting her number, us talking about going to the gym together since I mentioned that I want to be a personal trainer, and also how she's going to stop telling Freddy anything that she does, so she didn't give a **** about giving me her number. (And hopefully not telling him about all the dirty monkey sex we're going to be having.)
There is this HB8blackhair(maybe even 8.5) who I'd really like to talk to, but I have seen virtually no opportunities. She is in a different grade so we have no classes, no similar friends, never see her on weekends, but i've seen her make eye contact a few times while in her circle of friends(not a place I'd like to approach). I'd rather not resort to myspace. I suppose most will say that next time she makes EC to go up to her, but it's usually when she's surrounded by her friends and she could be making EC because she noticed I was looking at her.
Feedback appreciated!
So the next time you see her, even if she is walking in the opposite direction with her friends, just grab her arm and open her.
The Shocker
Senior Don Juan
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Docs
Banned
-Now, you'll want to slow it down just a tad. You don't want to be seen as a player.
Full speed ahead captain, i'm moving in mid June.Docs said:Niceeee
-Now, you'll want to slow it down just a tad. You don't want to be seen as a player.
edit: so Docs, got any advice on approaching this girl?
Docs
Banned
You are doing perfectly fine. I have nothing to add.
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.