"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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DJ Boot Camp: IOS

IOS

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Week 3: Day 2

Alright, so two conversations; with one HB7 and an HB7.5

HB7 was during economics class. Just opened asking her how she thought the midterm went last week (lame opener, I know...), and we got talking about economics, which somehow eventually morphed into a conversation about our hometowns. Probably a 5 minute conversation. Rapport was nice, just wish I could start kino, flirting a bit more, etc. She was very borderline dateable, I'd say she's just a step above not counting.

HB7.5 was when I was in line at the pita place on campus. The girl making my pita didn't look very happy, so I asked her how she liked working there. She talked about how much she hated it, how she can't really balance school with it, and I pretty much just listened and kept asking her questions. It was a nice conversation for sure. She didn't seem happy at all before I started talking to her, but brightened up when I did (especially when she bye). Place was so busy, I'm surprised I even got a decent convo in (4-6 minutes). It really was too busy for me to stop and get her number though. I hate making these excuses, I need to stop doing that.

So alright, 7 more to go and 5 days to do it. Hoping to move up to HB8s tomorrow, and try to get off boring subjects (I was proud of the second convo, but the first was pretty dull).
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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IOS

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Week 3: Day 3

Wow, what a terrible day. Not a single convo with an HB that I didn't already know today. Bummer. I don't know why I didn't, I guess it was just a lack of motivation. Which is not a good thing. Wow.

I really just have to motivate myself, and realize that this is not hard. My confidence has definitely improved, but it still has somewhere to go. I did a pretty good job last week when I set goals for myself. Therefore, my goal for tomorrow will be convos with 2HBs. I know I can do this.
 

arutha

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IOS said:
Alright, so two convos today, both with HB6.5s, meh. Didn't ask for numbers simply because I wasn't interested.
Don't kid yourself, this is just an excuse as well. Training and practicing, you should have no expectations and no standards. I started the boot camp 2-3 years ago (got in a relationship instead of finishing it... Oh well) and this was one of my problems early; I just wanted to talk to the really hot girls. You have said in your first post that number closing is a sticking point for you, my main one was having the confidence to talk to strangers no matter who they were.

Next time you are chatting to that 6 or 6.5, even if you aren't interested, get her number! Doesn't obligate you to ever call her, hell as soon as you walk away from her you can delete the number. That gives a good feeling of power. Fat chicks? Talk to them anyway, its just target practice. When you have successfully number closed 6.5's, the 7's 8's and 9's will just seem that much easier and more within reach, particularly because you have already heard yourself asking for a number and seen a girl give it to you, even if she wasn't really a viable target.

Other than that, you're going well! Keep it up mate.
 

IOS

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Week 3: Day 4

What a night

Ok, so earlier I did talk to two HB8s, but there was a guy there as well. I don't know if it really counts, as I kind of talked to them all as a group. I think it should count as two, as I did talk to them for a good five minutes, but I don't know if the guy there cancels anything else.

Later that night, we played flip cup in somebody's room at res, and I ended up somewhat employing dj skills after a few drinks. Not enough to be completely hammered, but i had a good buzz going. Anyways, that buzz allowed me to tease an HB8 there, do some kino, and everything. There was a point where I was giving her a foot massage (and she was loving it), and I was biting her too (she said she loved being bit, I don't know kind of weird). But then she just left out of nowhere, and I ended up with no sex. I kind of knew the girl before though, so that doesn't really count as anything.

Ok, so I had my two conversations if it counts if the guy was there. Still a bit buzzed right now, but I don't think two more convos with Hbs is unreasonable for tomorrow.
 

IOS

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Week 3: Day 5

arutha said:
Don't kid yourself, this is just an excuse as well. Training and practicing, you should have no expectations and no standards. I started the boot camp 2-3 years ago (got in a relationship instead of finishing it... Oh well) and this was one of my problems early; I just wanted to talk to the really hot girls. You have said in your first post that number closing is a sticking point for you, my main one was having the confidence to talk to strangers no matter who they were.

Next time you are chatting to that 6 or 6.5, even if you aren't interested, get her number! Doesn't obligate you to ever call her, hell as soon as you walk away from her you can delete the number. That gives a good feeling of power. Fat chicks? Talk to them anyway, its just target practice. When you have successfully number closed 6.5's, the 7's 8's and 9's will just seem that much easier and more within reach, particularly because you have already heard yourself asking for a number and seen a girl give it to you, even if she wasn't really a viable target.

Other than that, you're going well! Keep it up mate.
Thanks for the advice, and I'm pretty sure you're right. Not that I haven't been completely avoiding sub-7s, but I really should practise just asking for numbers before I move on to better targets. This is definitely something I'll try before moving to Week 4. Thanks for the encouragement!

Damn, so I was supposed to go to a party last night, but my buddies that I haven't seen in awhile called me up and I didn't think I would have a chance to hang out with them for a bit. So I hung out with them, and we went to see a movie at the theatre. I thought i'd have a bit of a chance to get some convos, but the theatre was packed, the employees there were too busy to chat, and I was stuck between two of my friends during the movie. Even after, we just went back and stayed in. So absolutely no convos yesterday.

So 5 left, and two days to do it. Thats still quite reasonable. I'm also considering doing an extra week of this like Walden did. I'm still not at the point where I can approach anybody, and thats an important step before next week. So if I find myself still hesitant by Day 7, I'll take that extra week.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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IOS

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Week 3: Day 6

A worse day then I thought. I made conversation with a half dozen or so Hbs today, but they always seemed like they were in a rush, and none of them lasted more then 2 minutes. Well one convo lasted a bit longer, talked to the clerk at a convenience store about working there. I find that people working are much more open to conversations because they're usually under a lot of pressure and its nice to get a friendly conversation in.

That being said, 4 more convos and 1 day to do it. And I am going to do the remedial week like Walden did. I'll go over the readings again, and establish the basics more firmly before I move on.

EDIT: WTF, I completely forgot about a conversation I had with an HB7.5. She's in my res, asked her what floor she's on, program she's taking, where her hometown is, etc and it was probably a 5 minute conversation. Can't believe that convo slipped by me. Looks like its only 3 convos for tomorrow then.
 
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IOS

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Week 3: Day 7

So I manged to get in my three convos today, which I was pretty happy with

1st was with an HB8 when I was walking through the concourse. She was handing out fliers for some new shop that opened, and asked her about what she was handing fliers out for, which eventually got into a topic about the university in general which was actually pretty interesting. She's a third year student, and had some interesting things to say. I felt very regretful after not number closing

2nd was with an HB7 in line at one of the take out restaurants on campus. I asked her what she recommended to eat, and she said that she rarely goes there because of the ridiculous lines. I agreed with her, and we had a solid conversation pretty much just bashing the restaurant, haha. Don't know if this was a good or bad thing, but it was fun anyways :D

3rd was with another HB7 who I recognized from my music class. She was in my res, and asked her how she was planning on studying for the midterm (because we have no textbooks or anything, its really up in the air). We talked about the class for a bit, before departing. Solid conversation, probably about 5 minutes.

So technically the week is over, but I'm going to do an extra week just practising the skills that I learned from the first three. I'm going to need the practise if I want to get through Week 4.
 

IOS

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Remedial Training: Day 1

So today I just worked a bit more on eye contact/saying hi to people. Said hi to a bunch of people, and I'm actually finding my conversations to be a lot less awkward, and more interesting. The key is just to not care what the other person thinks about you, and just act naturally. It worked perfectly, i actually number closed one of the HB7s from yesterday today. Will I call her eventually? Maybe. I'm just glad that I've already progressed as far as I have. Still, I'll use this week to get the necessary skills down 100%. Then I'll be ready for the following week.
 

IOS

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I've been really sick for the past two days, and have unfortunately been unable to get any interesting convos with HBs. A small roadblock, but I'm already feeling a bit better. I'm hoping to be fully back in action by tomorrow. Just wanted to keep you guys posted!
 

vagrant

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I'm all ears man. I stopped for now but like what you're doing I'm still having conversations with strangers and making eye contact with strangers, reviewing what I've learned. I know boot camp is supposed to be week by week but I believe if you just go with the process of finishing the boot camp and all of the assignments I would still get the same result which is getting out of my comfort zone when it comes to women or being social in general.

But yeah, like I said, I read your boot camp and I try to learn from it so keep going and don't stop no matter what. :up:
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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IOS

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Man, I've been in a rut thats been going on for far too long. Time to start up again.

I don't really remember where I left off, but i guess I was doing the remedial training. I'll start fresh from that, and see how that goes. Hopefully it'll only last a week until I'm back on track.

Thats not to say that I haven't already made improvement. Now I'm far more likely to start talking to somebody, or be more interesting in conversations. Most of all, I'm more "fun". However, things still aren't as good as they could be with the ladies, so here it goes again.

If all goes well, the journal will be good to go starting tomorrow
 
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