Divorce rates fall

[zekko]

I ran across this article the other day saying the divorce rates are falling, thought it was relevant since divorce is discussed here so often.

http://www.cnn.com/2011/LIVING/05/19/divorce.rates.drop/index.html?iref=allsearch

I'm not really drawing any conclusions from this, but if it is true that the rates are falling, here's my guess for what the reasons are:

1) People are waiting longer to get married, which means they are more mature, and are more choosy about their spouses.
2) When the economy is down, people will be less likely to risk changing a stable financial situation (in other words, women will be less likely to file).

 

[squirrels]

1) People are waiting longer to get married, which means they are more mature, and are more choosy about their spouses.

Fat chance of this.

2) When the economy is down, people will be less likely to risk changing a stable financial situation (in other words, women will be less likely to file).

This is the one.

Women have limited earning potential, regardless of the "feminist movement". MOST women just aren't as good at MOST things that make money as men are.

During good financial times, there are a sh!t-ton of cubicle-monkey jobs out there that provide women with ample money of their own, allowing them to explore their true promiscuous nature in their personal lives. If they are dissatisfied with a man, they will dump him in a heartbeat.

During bad times, those jobs are the first ones to go. Companies "tighten up" and won't hire people simply to have warm bodies to handle mundane tasks. During these times, women find a fairly stable man to latch onto for support. If they are dissatisfied with a man, they will still endure a LOT of crap before trying to get away. They MAY cheat on the side once in a GREAT while, if the danger of getting caught is low, but they will hang on to that support-line as much as possible.

The other thing to bear in mind is that promiscuity is being pushed further down the age-brackets. Before, in high school, you may have fooled around or "done it" once or twice, on average, but your true promiscuous days were in college or just after. These days, kids are starting to "do it" in Middle School, thanks to over-exposure to sexual marketing, and by high-school, both boys and girls are outright wh0res. By the time they get out of college, most of them are sexually "burned out"...they can't handle the rush and the swings of a promiscuous life, so they "settle down". Even if the guy is not what they want, they are just tired of effing with it.

Then there's the loss of religion in society today. People need something to latch onto in hard times. In previous generations, it was God and religion that provided them some source of hope, some sense of divine intervention being available. Most people these days have left organized religion behind.

The problem is that many of them throw the baby out with the bath-water...they can't get their head around the idea of a spiritual nature of the universe without a Bible or Koran or book of rules and cool stories to put it in "simple terms" for them. They need something that tells them how to live their lives "correctly" and something that has "magic" properties so they can believe those instructions are driven by a divine power, rather than originating from the self.

Without God, all they have left to turn to is "love". I'm not talking about real love, "agape" love, the sense of compassion and empathy for what's around you, but the ROMANTIC love that is heaped upon them from childbirth.

"True love conquers all! Believe in love!"

So without any sense of greater spirtuality, 99% of people in our generation embrace "love" as a pseudo-religious duty. That's why the world is full of chumps and chumpettes, constantly paying homage to "being in love" while secretly longing to escape it, like any major religion.

"Love" is the only major divinity left in the common person's life. To most, it becomes their divine calling. And you could do worse than REAL love as a divine/spiritual sense, but remember what I'm talking about by "love" is EROS, erotic/sexual/romantic love.

Look at our parents and grandparents...sure they were "in love", but they didn't do this coddling/cooing crap with each other. They didn't have sets of "rules" that had to be followed with their relationships. And "love", while important, certainly wasn't sacred. That's because they didn't embrace romantic love for its own sake, nor did they look to it for guidance/rules to live their lives by. They had a "real God" for that.

So I think there's three main reasons:
1) Financial hardship makes people less likely to give up financial support
2) Kids are getting "burned out" on f**king at earlier ages
3) With the old organized religions dead, romance provides a deity for the common man.

 

[DMSR76]

Great post squirrels. Quite logical and thought provoking.

 

[DJDamage]

I bet that marriage rates are also falling which affects the divorce rates.

Staying single and cohabitation is on the rise.

 

[zekko]

By the time they get out of college, most of them are sexually "burned out"...they can't handle the rush and the swings of a promiscuous life, so they "settle down". Even if the guy is not what they want, they are just tired of effing with it.

Squirrels, I agree with the bulk of what you said. But this caught my eye. I think this is the first time on this forum I've ever seen anyone suggest that people get tired of fvcking around. I'm not disagreeing with you, but this is the first time I've seen this said.

 

[SXS]

DJDamage is spot on.

 

[Burroughs]

Squirrels excellent post.

I'm curious on your thoughts (since you seem to have a fairly deep insight in this)...what are your thoughts on my generation (early to mid twenties) going forward..as we reach our 40s and 50s...without the support of religion and being burned out on human relations so early in life. Seems like money and shopping are the only values we have.

Not a pretty picture.

 

[The_411]

Fat chance of this.


This is the one.

Women have limited earning potential, regardless of the "feminist movement". MOST women just aren't as good at MOST things that make money as men are.

During good financial times, there are a sh!t-ton of cubicle-monkey jobs out there that provide women with ample money of their own, allowing them to explore their true promiscuous nature in their personal lives. If they are dissatisfied with a man, they will dump him in a heartbeat.

During bad times, those jobs are the first ones to go. Companies "tighten up" and won't hire people simply to have warm bodies to handle mundane tasks. During these times, women find a fairly stable man to latch onto for support. If they are dissatisfied with a man, they will still endure a LOT of crap before trying to get away. They MAY cheat on the side once in a GREAT while, if the danger of getting caught is low, but they will hang on to that support-line as much as possible.

The other thing to bear in mind is that promiscuity is being pushed further down the age-brackets. Before, in high school, you may have fooled around or "done it" once or twice, on average, but your true promiscuous days were in college or just after. These days, kids are starting to "do it" in Middle School, thanks to over-exposure to sexual marketing, and by high-school, both boys and girls are outright wh0res. By the time they get out of college, most of them are sexually "burned out"...they can't handle the rush and the swings of a promiscuous life, so they "settle down". Even if the guy is not what they want, they are just tired of effing with it.

Then there's the loss of religion in society today. People need something to latch onto in hard times. In previous generations, it was God and religion that provided them some source of hope, some sense of divine intervention being available. Most people these days have left organized religion behind.

The problem is that many of them throw the baby out with the bath-water...they can't get their head around the idea of a spiritual nature of the universe without a Bible or Koran or book of rules and cool stories to put it in "simple terms" for them. They need something that tells them how to live their lives "correctly" and something that has "magic" properties so they can believe those instructions are driven by a divine power, rather than originating from the self.

Without God, all they have left to turn to is "love". I'm not talking about real love, "agape" love, the sense of compassion and empathy for what's around you, but the ROMANTIC love that is heaped upon them from childbirth.

"True love conquers all! Believe in love!"

So without any sense of greater spirtuality, 99% of people in our generation embrace "love" as a pseudo-religious duty. That's why the world is full of chumps and chumpettes, constantly paying homage to "being in love" while secretly longing to escape it, like any major religion.

"Love" is the only major divinity left in the common person's life. To most, it becomes their divine calling. And you could do worse than REAL love as a divine/spiritual sense, but remember what I'm talking about by "love" is EROS, erotic/sexual/romantic love.

Look at our parents and grandparents...sure they were "in love", but they didn't do this coddling/cooing crap with each other. They didn't have sets of "rules" that had to be followed with their relationships. And "love", while important, certainly wasn't sacred. That's because they didn't embrace romantic love for its own sake, nor did they look to it for guidance/rules to live their lives by. They had a "real God" for that.

So I think there's three main reasons:
1) Financial hardship makes people less likely to give up financial support
2) Kids are getting "burned out" on f**king at earlier ages
3) With the old organized religions dead, romance provides a deity for the common man.

Gotta love the Alchemist allusion to "agape" love as it is apropos. I think people are actually afraid of marriage at this point for the simpel reason there's a pervasive belief that it's likely going to fail so why even bother. I don't blame anyoen for thinking that way especially guys.

The economic situation absolutely will lower divorce rates as women realize that the gravy train is harder to get when the economy is screwy.

I'm not sure that organize religion is to blame as much as political correctness, frivolous lawsuits, and the inability to punish without fear of retribution.

I've always argued that society needs its young men to fight (fist fight only) as a way of keeping people in check and teaching humility. Without this men become weak and entitlement runs rampant and certain behaviors aren't being checked.

I would also argue that a contributing factor is welfare state that the United States has become. It's almost like being unemployed and collecting money/food stamps is a way of life for a lot of people.

Then there's the women in the workplace angle where in past generations women stayed home and took care of the house. The male role was in a much more dominant positon then it is now. There's nothing wrong with it per se saver from the fact that men have been emasculated here (self imposed or otherwise)

Of course one can always talk about the absurd divorce laws and child support laws and how the male almost always is at fault regardless of actual fault.