Diving deeper into love and sex

[George Gordon]

What is the difference between love and sex? There seems to be something deeper than a Nice Guy--Jerk perspective on it.

I was out a few weeks ago with a chick who mentioned that the only guy that ever broke her heart had only held hands with her. Huh!? Yet this chick and her friends had 'guy check-lists'. They would go around sleeping with NHL players and other sports teams after games. I guess the challenge, the game. Yet, the only guy she ever 'loved' only held her hand?

What?!

The other day I had a similar experience for myself. I've been seeing this chick for about two months, and we've fooled around a lot, but no sex. Often, she gets really horny, but then ignores my further advances. She even got out of bed to lay down on the floor for a few minutes, cause she said that "the room was hot".

I woke-up in the morning only to realize that she was masturbating beside me. Pretty sure. I just pretended I was asleep and dozed off again. Later she got up and went to the bathroom and was in there for like 15-20 minutes. She comes back into my room and exclaims, "Oh! I didn't know you were up." "Wow! you had a pretty long sh!t there, huh?" I replied. Hmmm...

I've never been in a situation like this before where I know how turned on a woman is, yet she doesn't follow through on her passion. Her body says, yes, yes; her mind says, no, no. What's up with that? What's with the divide between 'woman' and 'person'.

Anyway. This is not what I want. So yesterday night, I said as she was leaving that "we should just be friends, okay?" I could see her heart shatter into a million pieces. She stood there in shock for a bit then left my apartment. I followed her down the stairs, her eyes red and watery. Eventually, she just broke down into tears in front of me.

Any insights? I do not get what is going on here?

!GEORGE GORDON!

 

[Don Ronny]

I've been seeing this chick for about two months, and we've fooled around a lot, but no sex.

Major red flag. Unless you are both abstaining for religious purposes, there is really no reason to wait this long dude. Sounds like you both have issues with sexuality.

I was out a few weeks ago with a chick who mentioned that the only guy that ever broke her heart had only held hands with her. Huh!? Yet this chick and her friends had 'guy check-lists'. They would go around sleeping with NHL players and other sports teams after games. I guess the challenge, the game. Yet, the only guy she ever 'loved' only held her hand?

People often love the unattainable and equate someone who fails to invalidate them as a soul mate. Human nature is tricky that way.

I woke-up in the morning only to realize that she was masturbating beside me. Pretty sure. I just pretended I was asleep and dozed off again.

WhatTheMotherFukk??!! WHY???????????

Are you gay?

Where the hell are your balls?

If I had that girl in my bed and she was fiddling around in her panties, I woulda started kissing her, then feelin those nice titties, then caressing her stomach softly, then grabbing her ass, then fingering while I suck the titties, then more kissing, then back to the titties, ass, titties, ass, thighs, titties, ass, ass, finger, finger, finger, FINGER, FINGERRRRRR!!!! and right as she is about to explode I stick my dikk in her.

case closed.

Her body says, yes, yes; her mind says, no, no. What's up with that? What's with the divide between 'woman' and 'person'.

ALmost all the girls I been with have given me last minute resistance. How do you get past it=? Simple. When they say, "we shouldnt be doing this" you verbally agree with them and just keep getting them turned on. If they keep pulling away, you just freeze them out and ignore them for a while. Believe me, it will work alot better than your comment about her taking a sh!t.

Ultimately, you need to be more aggresive there Georgie Boy. Stop being such a pvssy!

You LJBFed when you just shoulda banged her!

 

[George Gordon]

Originally posted by Don Ronny
Major red flag. Unless you are both abstaining for religious purposes, there is really no reason to wait this long dude. Sounds like you both have issues with sexuality.

Actually it was a religious issue with her.

If I had that girl in my bed and she was fiddling around in her panties, I woulda started kissing her, then feelin those nice titties, then caressing her stomach softly, then grabbing her ass, then fingering while I suck the titties, then more kissing, then back to the titties, ass, titties, ass, thighs, titties, ass, ass, finger, finger, finger

That's about where she 'shut-down' earlier. Is this like a really weird chick? I haven't met a girl like this before.

!GEORGE GORDON!

 

[NRM]

If you know your woman won't have sex because of religious reasons then you need to accept it and respect it. If you are looking for an intimate relationship with sex then don't get involved with women who won't have it. Don't expect it if you know she won't give it.

 

[Don Ronny]

A Church Gal! I knew it!

In order to help you more we need details.. How did she stop the escalation? What did she say and how did you respond?

Sidenote: I avoid religious chicks like the plague. Brainwashed people turn me off and dont get me started on their sexual hangups! The last Christian chick I banged? Worst. Lay. EVER.

 

[Life-Trainee]

Heheh, my bud's GF was highly religious, but he's such a perv I bet she worships satan now.

 

[Cheiradawg]

Someone once suggested men not date women with addictions. These include alcohol, drugs, and born again Christianity.

 

[Dirtheart]

What do you want from this girl - love, sex or both? Here's the thing, right now you have her totally hot for you and emotionally attached too, so if you can be patient about the sex, this girl sounds like she could be good LTR material.

Women thrive on challenge and anticipation. The longer you keep a girl waiting for sex, the more she wants you.

I posted a tip on this a while back after speaking to a female friend of mine (http://www.sosuave.com/vBulletin/showthread.php?threadid=52712)

I've noticed it myself too. If I postpone sex with a girl I'm dating (and I often do for this reason) she is all over me and gets really fired up.

But it depends what you want from this girl and how long you can wait.

 

[Hollowpoint]

Originally posted by NRM
If you know your woman won't have sex because of religious reasons then you need to accept it and respect it. If you are looking for an intimate relationship with sex then don't get involved with women who won't have it. Don't expect it if you know she won't give it.

I totally agree.

Originally posted by Cheiradawg
Someone once suggested men not date women with addictions. These include alcohol, drugs, and born again Christianity.

Hahahahahaha!

 

[diplomatic_lies]

Maybe the guy who "only" held her hand didn't want her.

 

[So pimp its scary]

Hi there George,

This is like two threads in one, cause at first you ask the difference between love and sex.

Here's my answer to that question : Love can be sexless just as sex can be loveless, but the pleasure that you get from love is limitless, while the pleasure from sex is merely the act itself.

To prove the point, many people have dedicated their lives to spreading their love ot the world and received much more pleasure from it then they would have had from any sexual encounter. (Although whether or not these people masturbate could be questioned)

Now, about the dilemma with this girl...

I've dated a really catholic girl, and there was no way that I would ever get sex with her (I went out with her for 4 months, and she said after we broke up that if we were together just a bit longer she would have caved ).

Except, to see her masturbating next to you??? I honestly can say that I don't know how I would deal with that situation, but I wouldn't have pretended to sleep while she was doing it. No Biggie...

But, is this the same girl that is the volunteer 'puck' that comes in after the game?

If so, there is no reason for her to not shag, and I would recommend dropping her. Because if she's not a virgin, then she's a born again christian, and they are the most extreme in their religion.

[rant]
I would like to add, that I personnally have a big problem with women that are virgins for religious reasons. It was an idea that was ideal in times long past when children where to be married at 13-15 years old.

To wait for sex untill you are into your twenties just causes stress to the person. Also, there have been studies to show that men that are not getting sex are alot more likely to be convicted of a violent crime.

I take Nietzche's perspective on this "Vilifying sex is the worst thing that religion has done to mankind" (or something to that effect)

Lastly, when there is passion between two people it's only natural that the encounter ends in sex. Just to remind that random paternity tests throughout north america have found that 30% of families are with an illigitimate child (or children).

Bottom line, holding back from sex is bad, mmmmkay.
[/rant]

G'day my friend.

 

[George Gordon]

As it turned out, not a day later--yesterday--she called me to come over and talk at 10pm. The talking lasted about an hour. Then, we were up all night until she had to go to work at 8:00am.

!GEORGE!

 

[So pimp its scary]

Just talking?!?